ryedalema

Oh - I forgot to mention - lots and lots of praise/positive reinforcement when she behaved well or handled a situation or emotion well too (being really specific what she was getting the praise for). Worked really well for us.

We put dd1 in the naughty corner each and every time. It resulted in instant crying, which we ignored (and went into another room for mostly). But when the hysterical crying subsided we went to her and she got a cuddle if she said sorry - now it's evolved to saying sorry to the person(s) she offended and voicing what she was sorry for. Sounds a bit draconian when written down but she knew the rules from day one and we haven't 'moved the goalposts' on her. Truth is now my OH and I both end up in the naughty corner as much as she does and I delighted in the time recently when she sent Grandpa into the naughty corner for talking with his mouth full. Something I'd shied off broaching for..umm...decades. It's worked for us - and touch wood and a bit more - we've a well adjusted little one with manners and forethought. Good luck with yours - there is an end to it xxx

Reneet - I was exactly the same. Had a 2.5 year old, a very high pressure job (dd in f/t nursery) and my husband worked away from home Monday to Friday. At the time dd was at nursery in Waterloo as I worked in the city and I'd literally pick her up, feed her on the bus and creep upstairs and into bed when we got home - both of us passing out in the 'big bed'. Weekends weren't much better as there was lots of resentment between dd1 (who thought Daddy had abandoned her) and my OH (who felt outside of the family) and that all came out each weekend while I was trying to referee and keep the family united. Ughhh..I'm so sorry I can't offer any advice (other than move to a desert island of course) but I really feel for you. I felt like I was an up the duff hamster on a wheel - going nowhere fast but exhausting myself each day doing it. We changed a load of things about our lifestyle after that. I kept the job (but negotiated better working patterns), my OH found work in London, we moved the nursery nearer so we could drive there and drop off both girls (and shorten the commute), and we decided that two was enough - so we're (hopefully) not going to have me preggers and commuting again. You WILL come out of the other side. Good luck xxxxxxx

Yes she's asking to go back. I'd like her to go back. My OH thinks she's not ready to go back, but she seems perfectly fit/healthy to me. I am self employed - yes.

Ah good point - the shoes had been planned for a while and I used the opp. of apparent lack of illness plus time to get them - but I can see how it looked to her. The outfit was existing (but matched the shoes). The ice cream and lunch?? Umm - no excuse there..:-$

Morning all - just wanted to hear your views on this one. We were called by the nursery to pick up DD1 on Wednesday as she had a temperature. And fair enough when I got there (stopping off at Scoop for - ahem- ice cream medicine on the away) she looked like a bit of limp lettuce (poor thing) and we took her straight home to bed (and proper medicine). Yesterday I stayed off and looked after her - and we went shoe shopping, to the library and to lunch. Not much sign of an illness in any respect - but in the evening she got a bit hot and my OH told me off for over exerting her (hmmm - possibly the other way around!) So I'm off again today - Madam is playing princesses, wearing the new shoes and Snow White outfit, and I can still see no sign of an illness 'cept for a snotty nose and a cough (neither are bad). - I'm of the 'stay busy and work through it' school of illness - My OH is of the 'bed ridden until better and then a bit more' school of illness What do/would you do? I'm ok staying off (although obv. the work is backing up) and don't want to do wrong by Madam little one - but she's asking to go back to nursery (albeit with new shoes and dress on)and is pretty bored with 'just Mum' to play with... Ho hum.....

I'm so sorry that you've gone through this. I went through something a little similar with my first as the nursery I had lined up went into liquidation 2 weeks before i went back to work (a new job) and a week before she was due to start. It's completely horrid and turns your life upside down. It sounds incredibly out of order that they didn't give you the consideration of taking you into a quiet part (??) of the nursery to discuss this. I agree, ask the Head for an appointment, if you don't feel you've been given due courtesy after this, then you can talk to Ofsted. Not a particularly nice way to go - but they are the regulating body. On another note - our nursery is wonderful and I think they may have places. Not sure which area you need/want. But PM me if you are interested. I promise the Head will be lovely to you - whatever you decide.

You can order from Duo dance online..and if you are desperate for stuff (to borrow) in the next few days before it arrives we might be able to help - if the same size of course. Let me know if useful..

Absolutely the best way - both of mine were particularly eager to see the world too! Congratulations of your new little girl - the adventures now begin!!!:)-D

I was going to say the Hardy Boys (and Nancy Drew) stories - I read dozens of them. Thought they might be girlie though - obviously not! Wonderful books! Edited to add - I had my first massive crush on the Hardy Boys :-$:-$.. Not sure that's a great recommendation for an eight year old....

Aww - I loved Enid Blyton. The Magic Faraway Tree was my favourite. What about Roald Dahl?? (Wish i was a kid again!!)

Totally agree - are they any darker than HP though? I got pretty scared by Mister Potter's antics in places (well not that scared, but then Scooby doo scares me):-$

Have you done the Philip Pullman ones yet? Or are they a bit old?. I loved them all and am a big kid (loved HP too!)

I'd recommend the Florence (Herne Hill sister pub to the Bishop and Actress). It has good grown up and kiddie food and a separate indoor 'sizeable' playroom for the children (with changing facilities and loos alongside).

Snufflebabe is the 'vicks vapour rub' meant for really little ones - and the docs/chemist say to rub it into the soles of their feet (and their backs but not their chests). Don't know why, but apparently it's a magic trick. I do feel for you - so worrying/knackering when you're just getting used to looking after a small bundle. It does get better - but I'm afraid to say increased socialisation (going to nursery etc) and teething brings on a lot of snot traumas too. Oh - and throwing up green stuff seems to be pretty normal. Totally gross, but I guess better out than in.

Cafe Nero's not bad either. I know it's a 'superbrand' but always seems filled with babies and Mums. Plus it's next to Jo Jo MB so you can dash in there if you have any emergencies ((as I once had with a baby taking antibiotics - spectacular re-emergence of breakfast!). Or (I know, I know) Starbucks at Sainsburgers. Quite large and loads of room to 'hide' at the back. xx

Narnia Wrote: ------------------------------------------------------- > paul32A Wrote: > -------------------------------------------------- > ----- > > Narnia - Just commenting on the ridiculous > > statement of ryedalema who somehow thinks that > the > > fact he was in the area 5 or so hours before > > anything happened meant his kids were somehow > > lucky to have avoided their untimely deaths. > > Seemed just a tad self-important to try and > feel > > part of the whole sorry tale. > > I take your point apart from the fact that s/he > asked what time it happened at. Where do you get > your 5 hours before from? Ok - if it seemed I was trying to be part of this or seeming self important I completely apologise. I definitely do not want to detract from the tragedy for the victims, their families or anyone actually involved. I was, in fact: - genuinely asking the time of the incident (haven't been out to see Police boards and can't find it on the news) - actually thinking that we might have seen something that could help. Of course I don't want my children involved (or me for that matter) - don't think that's particularly wrong. I hope I've closed this off and we can get back to the purpose of this thread now.

Oh awful, awful - poor man and his family and friends. Does anyone know what sort of time this happened? I was there with my two young girls early evening. There but for the grace...

At 3 is there at all the possibility that they could try and do it themselves with lots of bribery (my new parenting method of choice)? It might be the lack of control that they are baulking at? And difficult to tell I know, but do the drops sting? If they are non--stingy then the DIY-bribery method could work, but I guess there could be lots of wastage from butterfingered attempts. Worth a try??

The promise of Disney Cinderella figurine (?3 from the PO at the bottom of our road!) worked really well. After Madam kicking off her duvet, pillows and the walls the first night, and NOT getting the toy that I'd shown her, she behaved really well last night. Only getting out of bed for a loo stop. Hoorahhh! One piece of horrid branded plastic/future landfill presented to huge smiles. Now she has to go two more nights to get another one - Tinkerbell this time. It'd be easier I think if the kids at nursery didn't wind each other up with 'killing each other' and bats, spiders, monsters and other scary things. Is it me or is this all much younger than... (coughs up Werthers Original while peering over bifocals) ...in my day??? I'm sure I wasn't scared of that kind of stuff until at least primary school. Anyone concur?

Those figurines sound just the ticket - do you happen to know where to get them? Is it a Sainsbury's job, or a Toys R Us excursion?

Yeah we have a version of the bunny clock which turns green in the morning when she's allowed to get up. Trouble is she gets into bed (after the usual grumps) and watches the clock from bedtime...until she drops off, then wakes really early (the 4s) in the hope that it is green, and waits until it is...aaaggh. We've started turning it off as it can't be healthy losing sleep waiting until getting up time. How do you get past that one? Little madam! Sparkly socks sound good - I can surprise her with them in the morning. And actually anything sparkly/princessy would work.

Oh I'm glad others bribe...phew. I thought I was committing some cardinal bad mummy sin. The 'water' sounds fab - will definitely try that. And yes I think you're right.. five days probably is too long. I don't want to mess with brekkie if I can (have got a family bowl of porridge with dates routine shared among all of us which is really cute and baby gets to get involved) but can definitely find some other treat in the morning after a 'good' night. (Non choc/sweet related of course!) Hmmmmm - will put thinking cap on.

I know we've possibly/probably made a rod for our own backs but we've been less than strict with eldest dd about her sleeping in her own bed. Especially when our baby (who shares a room with her) is a bit restless and (ahem) vocal. Her argument? 'Daddy and Mummy get to share beds - why can't i? Hmmmmmmmm...... Now madam (aged 3.5) is refusing to go to sleep in her own bed - saying that she's lonely and that she might have bad dreams. We've tried buying her own special bed, 'magic' teddies who ward off evil boogeymen, stickers...and tonight sees the start of the latest bribery, 'go five nights in your own bed without crying and Barbie can have some new clothes'. Has anyone got any better suggestions for easy bed-loving? I hate to bribe with branded/plastic but it's the only thing I can think of right now. I'd really welcome your advice on this :))

The days, weeks, and probably months, after the birth are (sorry to say) mostly all about the mum and little one. Your illnesses will get short shrift - cos we need to mend and nourish a young'un! My OH suffered from a chronic earache minutes after I gave birth to our second, meaning that he was pretty much useless. I was not impressed! Call me mean-spirited but I wanted to be put first... just this once!!