dulwichmum

Dear tomM, Thanks for that. I thought as much, pah!

Dear Ms Polly Dorner, I wonder if you could enlighten me. I am relatively new to all of this wonderful technical jargon - does 'lol' mean 'lots of love' or 'laughing out loud'? My husband James has not come home from the rugby yet, and has sent me a text. I am not sure if he is in trouble with me...... Linda Barker lives on Underhill Road, you can spot her house(s) a mile off. Perhaps she made off with a job lot of cream paint from the set of one of her make-over shows.

Dear Beth, Thanks for that. The next school fate - I will be there with my 'home made' (ha, ha) donation with the best of them!

Dear Beth, Can I have your cake baking chums' (Anna) phone number please? You would really be doing me a good turn. Home baking is just too much hassle since I returned to work, and I love the sound of the chocolate gooey one! Mmmmmmmmmm. Mr Batdog, I think it is wonderful that you are turning out to be an international sex symbol. I knew it would be so, I just felt it instinctively!

Dear Beth, That is really good to hear. Too many times I have heard how laborious the process is to apply for lottery charitable funds etc. I have often wondered if any of these funds ever go to local charities.

Look I am not very good at explaining myself this evening. I have had a bad day.

Dear Mr Huguenot, I apologise for making fun of your name. It is nearing that time of the evening, and I am counting the minutes down until seven when I can put the corkscrew in the bottle...............

Dear Mr Batdog, I am sure Ms BonnieParker will agree with me that you are terribly mysterious and awfully masterful - in a very manly (and undogly) way! Sigh. I think I shall go and watch the au pair unload the dishwasher.

Dear Mr Spadetownboy and Mr Batdog, Be careful what you say about Peckham. Mr Snorky will jump out of no-where. We love Peckham and will not hear a word said against it.

Dear Bob, This is true I fear. Has anyone ever heard of any money from this wonderful charity actually being spent locally? I myself have never heard of a single pound of 'Children in need' or 'Help a London child' money being spent locally, and I might have cause to know about it if it ever was.

Dear Mr Huguenot, I think that we should ask Mr Crystalclear to have his body waxed for charity. I would be happy to write a large cheque from the joint account for that.

Ha, ha, ha. Very funny boys. As for you Mr Huge-not, I shall have words with your mother in the playground!

Dear Capt_birdseye, This is just the best news, and a great way to start the weekend. Congratulations.

Dear BonnieParker, Hurrah! I can still spot an eligable man even on the internet! You make Mr Batdog sound rather luscious. Indeed I found it hard to resist his witty conversation all along, but now that you have told me he has pots of money - why I am trying now to resist running to Agent Provocateur with my child benefit money and asking to see their tassle collection! How can I be sure you are not in fact his sister, trying to make him sound dammed attractive? I think Ms BonnieParker we must endeavour to join you up with Mr Batdog, then you will be happy, and I cannot get myself into further trouble! A lady should not be greedy.

Dear Ant, There are some things I do not need to exaggerate - I think you know what I mean. I am still up for the babysitting!

Dear Spymum, Whatever you say AC. Let's leave it at that.

Dear Louisa, Don't be too traumatised by agreeing with me, most of the time I am in character, and I don't actually agree with myself either! Batdog is not - I suspect a dog, or a superhero (although he certainly is for me) and I rather suspect that he is in fact a terribly attractive man!

Surely you don't believe everything you read on a blog that is clearly a work of fiction?

Yes Mr Shambles, You are so right, they are off at seven - to boarding school! (Only joking)

Mr Huguenot, The title of this thread is beneath you! You are quite the scamp young man - to the naughty step with you. I have always been a mainstream medicine girl, so I have no experience of this phenomena. However, it sounds as though you really wouldn't mind being a man trapped inside a womans body. Oh, dear I a am rather writing myself into a pickle now aren't I?

Thanks for that Spymum, I have googled Timothy Spall, so I see who you mean. Yes, Jo is a complete star.

Well said!

Dear Bob S, You see, you must be careful darling, you reap what you sew!

Dear Dany, Virtuous young men such as yourself are (I believe) few and far between.

Forgive me, who is Timothy Spall?