dulwichmum

Ha, ha, yes, it is certainly true of this mum anyhow. I love the way you run and hide, you really make me laugh. My son does that when he disagrees with me! He says 'don't be scary mummy'

Dany, you are a gentelman! Wow, there are actually some left!

Wow!

Dear Ant, It sure does, my baby arrested three times in Kings. She was in ITU on a ventilator and came home after two weeks. We were told she would never walk, or talk. My word, it makes me grateful every day to see her smile at us. She has defied the initial diagnosis and original doctors. After an experience like that, it takes a long time for the family to recover it's equilibrium. Just to learn to trust 'life' again, if you know what I mean. I am still a basket case even now and she is almost four.

Dear Dany, Is this what you expect of your wife dear heart? What fun!

It is just the hardest time, isn't it?

My dear Bob s, I fear it is not an 'au pair' you are looking for! The job description sounds a little like a French maid, but perhaps a little more 'involved' shall we say?

Dear Dany, Perhaps, but look closely, and a lot of it is superficial. People are afraid to let the facade down, if you see what I mean. It can be less than honest.

Regularly, you would be surprised!

Poor you.

Sadly, it is the only dance I know.

Dear Ant, I have been there, and my baby still wakes us up occasionally at night. You poor love. If you ever want a night out, send me a private message, and I will come around with the au pair, so baby dumpling will be well cared for. I think I can safely say I am more than qualified.

Dear Ant, You noticed that too? My pair love it. A classic.

Dear Georgia, You were right to offer for me, I would certainly be happy to babysit for Ant's baby. I am too frightened of Snorky to come out for the Next Forum Night Out, so I will be free.

Dear Reidos, You can get a comprehensive list by phoning the early years section at Southwark Council. They can also give you a list of local childminders, which can be a good option for a little one. I think the no. is: 0207 525 5000 - although I could be wrong.

Dear Ant, I hope you and your partner are getting some sleep. New babies are lovely, but they are very very hard work. Poor you.

Dear Dany, I am afraid I never heard of the tutoring business you describe - that would be ideal. There is actually no professional register at all for nannies, and therefor no set minimum qualifications. I had an idylic idea of what raising children would be like, and like yourself imagined lolling about at home a lot, and arranging cushions on the sofa while watching Richard and Judy, but it actually turned our to be terribly hard. I ran back to work! Just getting them to school age (never mind out the door to school of a morning) is so difficult I could just cry at times. I thought I loved babies, but now I realise, I really just love it when they are cheekey and a little bit more independent. God it is hard work, and I have so much respect for stay at home parents - it certainly is not an easy job. I like smiling at miserable people in the street, I do it all the time - try it, it really shocks them. I don't see that many misery guts on Lordship Lane though, I must admit. Come to the Village - now that is a different story!

Yes, apparently they are even fair to lovely grape farmers in South Africa, so we can still drink wine.

Dear James, I should have said 'disguised' as a Tramp. I have a huge affection for Jo Brand, and however she dresses is fine with me. She is a great mum too.

Oh no, not Top Shop? OK no more Top Shop. Do you think Zara too?

Dear Dany, You are right. A nanny however is incredibly expensive, and I suppose they should be, because they do the most difficult job ever - in my opinion. I have never worked so hard in my life as when I was at home with the children full-time. We have a lovely au pair, and she doesn't take out the bins either, my husband does it.

Actually, I'll stay at home myself, just in case Snorky changes his mind.

Dear Mockney, Wow, thanks for that. That article took my breath away. No more clothes for the children from Tesco either!

OK now I have been christened by Snorky. Thanks for that. But, whatever does he mean? I am not trying to be funny. My blog is fact. I consider myself to be - I suppose a type of a bird in a guilded cage - perhaps more of a vibrantly attired drunk trapped in a wine cellar.

Dear James, You are of course right. It was Vanessa Feltz and a gossip mag. I remember now. She was dressed as a tramp and sitting at one of the tables on a bench. My brain shrank when I was pregnant, and I have been in a state of exhaustion ever since. Life is just not what it was ...I think in a good way. zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz Oh, sorry, what was I saying?