Scribe

Pearson, in future I will take your impaired literacy into consideration before criticising your spelling. But in return I must ask you to answer a question. How are my actions prehistoric? Man has been using a bow to hunt game throughout history, and still does.

Pearson, you're about as monosyllabic as prehistoric or "early man".

131 Underhill Road, East Dulwich, 1870. Obadiah has returned home from a gruelling, fourteen hour shift of strangling cattle. He's enscornced in his favourite chair, sipping his end-of-week glass of stout whilst casually browsing the Dulwich Gazette. He slowly drifts into a gentle slumber, the echoing thud of horse and cannon beckons him back to the mud and slaughter of the Sevastopol. A war in which he proudly served his queen. Suddenly he's disturbed from his fading memories by his daughters' excited glee. 'Papa, papa, come and see. Hattie and I have been washing lace in the village and we got half a crown.' Obadiah proudly ruffles their hair, and asks his wife, Prudence, if there was any post. 'Your brother writes us from Canada, I've left the letter in your draw upstairs.' 'Oh mama, can we read it now', the daughters chimed in unison. 'No, we'll read it after dinner.' Obadiah settles back into his chair, and takes another deep draft of stout, content in the world. 131 Underhill Road, East Dulwich, 2011. 'Mummy. Mummy, my iphone's broken. I need you to check the warranty and get it replaced. Otherwise you and daddy are going to have to get me another one. 'Not now, darling. Can't you see that I'm booking you a place in an ethnic story telling workshop. And besides, it's your first day at school. Are you ready?' 'I'm not starting primary school until you've replaced my iphone!' 'Babushka, take her to school will you. I need a lie down.' 'Yiz, highness.' Oh tempora o mores!

Zeban, I'm not being aggressive, I'm being tenacious. I simply initiated a thread that cordially invited other hunters to discuss and swap details. It was then hi-jacked, and I defended my position with equal measure. I admit that I've perhaps over-stepped the mark once or twice, but I felt it necessary to stave-off what I perceived as aggressive, group harrassment, engaged in inflammatory supposition. You'll also notice that I haven't on any occasion used bad language or issued threats against my detractors. Overall, I've remained quite calm.

No, RosieH, we aren't. What causes you to think/suspect otherwise. And do you have any other input, aside from making patently false implications?

Annette, you're one to talk. You attached a picture of what I can only assume was a cowardly friend or loved one crouched over an animal that was taken as a trophy. You disgust me.

No, you illiterate cretin. I'm defending my position, and by doing so, explaining mine and others' methods to offer a wider understanding to those who aren't familiar. But tell me something, Tarot. Are you and Pearson one and the same? I ask because you both display a suspiciously similar incompetence when it comes to typing.

Paddy's walking through the village holding a bag of doughnuts. He bumps into Murphy who asks Paddy what's in the bag. Murphy: So, watchya gat in da bag, boy? Paddy: Doughnuts. Murphy: Can ah have one if ah guess 'ow many you've gat? Paddy: Murphy, if ya can guess 'ow many doughnuts oiv gat in da bag, yer can have both o' dem. Two Irish couples decide to spice up their sex lives by swapping partners. Afterwards, Paddy says, "That was fockin' grand! I wonder how da gels got on."

Aquarius moon, I don't feel any sorrow or remorse when I stalk and cleanly kill a deer. I see it as prey. And even if I were to, unintentionally, cause my quarry suffering with a bad shot, I'd probably just feel frustrated. But I would swiftly cut its throat or drive a blade under the base of its skull, so as to not prolong any undue agony. It would seem that we're just going to have to agree to disagree on this one.

Pearson, a shotgun license is a fairly straight-forward proceedure. A full-bore license, however, is not. To be deemed responsible enough to own a full-bore weapon you must submit yourself to a gradual and arduous progression through calibers increasing in size. This proceedure also requires mentoring. The police also scrutinise any weapons you keep your property, and how they are secured. They do this every six months, so I'm told. I prefer a bow or a crossbow because it's more in tune with nature and it is less demanding in a legal sense. I know all of this because I've asked. There's no conspiracy on my part, however which way you go about implying it. Oh, and to counter the argument that bow hunting is inhumane. Studies have found that using a kill head competently will not result in the beast suffering more harm than if it was taken with a gun. Besides, there are many variables to contend with on both weapons to reach an absolute comparison. And to quell any suspicion that I attached an image of a kill head to cause friction, this is what is legally not permisable when taking large game, across the EU and North America. It is what's used in target and field archery. It's called a pile or bullet head: http://www.quicksarchery.co.uk/superbasket/images/products/636/s_qp15.jpg

Hunting with both a bow and a crossbow is illegal in the UK. I never said/wrote that I take large game in the UK with either. I quite clearly stated that I go abroad. But yes, hunting with a dog of whatever breed is illegal in the UK - I don't support it, as I've made quite clear throughout this thread.

Pearson, my comment was aimed at all my baseless, selective detractors. And I don't have a "bow fetish", either. I just can't be bothered with all the fuss and police intrusions that come with owning a firearm in this country. Aquarius moon, I don't have a "sick hobby". You're predictable sticking your fingers in your ears and falling back on a popular rebuttal without offering a reasoned reply. Sucks to be you. Annette Curtain, what I can only assume is your husband must be very proud of himself to have shot a Coyote. He is exactly the sort of pathetic, cowardly parasite that gives conscietious hunters a bad name. Or did he do the animal justice and eat it? Captain Scarlet, I don't hunt bears. They're are a protected species in the countries where I hunt with a bow. And whenever I hunt, I do so in a way that gives the beast I'm stalking a sporting chance of survival. Many of my quarry have escaped my stomach.

More weak spin from those who enjoy the flesh from the animals they proclaim to be sacrosanct. But openly condemn those who harvest the meat they eat. How hypocritical, how false, but oh so revealing.

OK, I won't deny that I enjoy the tracking aspect, but unless you've done it yourself, you can't appreciate the spiritual connection of hunting an animal and enjoying it as food. I could be as petty as you and say that you revel in the uprooting of an inncocent, vulnerable vegetable, but I won't. I won't apologise for hunting animals. It's perfectly natural. It's the way of the world. Are you so disparaging towards motorists, whose vehicles emmisions contribute towards the suffering of animals all over the world? Oh, and do you wear plastic shoes I'm sorry, but you're pathetic in your selective, misguided scorn.

Nice spin, on something you seem incapable of debating. I don't have the time to trawl through your x amount of posts on this forum. But I admit that I suggested you were stupid because you implied that I was sick because I hunt animals. I'm happy respect your decision not to eat animals, but I ask you to respect my position on legitimate hunting.

You need insurance to shoot on private land, in case you do something like, errm, damage something valued beyond your means to personally replace.

What are you blathering on about? I'm not trying to wind anyone up. I started this thread with good intentions. We've only gone down this road because my thread has been hi-jacked and I'm being labelled as some kind of monster. I'm not. And I'd appreciate it if we could steer this thread back on course, thank you very much!

Captain Scarlet/Swampy, I'm going to ignore your last comment and try to address this contention in a civilized manner. As I've consistently maintained throughout this thread: I oppose trophy hunting i.e - running foxes ragged with hounds. It's a cowardly, pointless pursuit. But I would be a fool to think that the hunting of animals is welcomed by all. It's not. When I hunt large game with a bow I do it humanely and conscientiously. I use a specialised kill head that's designed to cause enormous hemorrhaging, so as to bleed-out the animal as quickly as possible. It's also the law. I also pay the animal due respect by putting myself in its habitat. I don't hide in a wooden box all day waiting for a dozy deer to walk across my line of fire. I also harvest all the meat that I can and keep the hide with a view to sell it. We hunters are also avid conservationists, in that we strive to maintain the environment we hunt in. In fact, I'd even go so far as to say we probably share exactly the same environmental principles. In short, I'm not a monster/mysteron. Below is what a kill head looks like, if you are unfamiliar with its appearance: http://t1.gstatic.com/images?q=tbn:ANd9GcSn1aXr4EzvxRbSg_Uzxlv-2uYYDk-8td8EHfITNqWGFDJyQLTM&t=1

No, I'm not sick. Are you stupid? As gathering-up all those free-range chickens I keep hearling about and seeing advertised in shop windows along Lordship Lane is technically hunting. So, how on earth do you all live with yourselves?

Again, pure, desperate supposition. I've never, although I have been invited, clubbed seals. I'm not interested, as there's no sport in attacking - not hunting - a creature that is largely immobile on land. I have no desire to meet you, as you probably smell and have moss growing out of your arse. But I will ask you again. Where did I say/write that I was interested in hunting with dogs? You can, of course, admit that you were clutching at straws and that no such interest was displayed by myself, or others for that matter. P.s. It's spelt boar, not "bore", you pillock.

Katie, thank you for assuming an impartial stance. But as I've previously said/written, I prefer to take large game with either a compound or primitive bow, not with a gun. I don't have a license. This means I have to travel to the continent to enjoy my sport, although I have stalked deer with a gun in Scotland and the north of England before. I'll have a look around some of the sites based in the Highlands. Captain Scarlet, I am entitled to hunt with a bow or whatever means that are legally permisable, and I do. I can't stand judgemental people such as yourself who snatch at any opportunity you can reach to attack the hunting community. Besides, where have I said/written that I do or am interested in hunting with dogs?

Oh dear. Another naive, dreadlocked crusty who thinks that cows grow on trees.

Emailed to me from my nephew. Oh, and in case any eyebrows get raised by these clips, worry not, we're an informal kinda family.

Us long-term residents refer to it as 'no man's land', mazza.