*Bob*

I mean - check out Southwarks events page! 'The Big Dance'. You what? 'Celebrating Women'. Do I look like a woman?! It's enough to make your blood boil. 'The Carnival Del Pueblo'. Do me a favour, Pedro..

Huguenot Wrote: ------------------------------------------------------- > It simply shouldn't be paid for by people who > don't want to go. You might be onto something here, Hugenot. I wonder, if we all think really, really hard - maybe we can identify other areas of public spending where money goes on stuff that not everyone wants to go to / do. Like.. well.. virtually everything.

I knew he reminded me of something(s)

Looking at his picture.. I don't think he's be up for it. That said - I did see quite a few people dressed very much like him at last year's Secret Garden.

Now I know what the festivals I go to have been lacking.. an open air mass. Would the Bishop of Southwark be available for the Secret Garden Party? How do I get in touch?

Don't knock East 17, Jeremy. Anyone who can manage five weeks at the top of the Christmas hit parade and run themselves over with their own car deserves a little more respect.

Huggers Wrote: ------------------------------------------------------- I'm amazed how all very 'good on > yer, little englander' the normally bonkers daily > mail commentators are on this story. That's because he looks like this: The comments would be slightly different if he looked more like this:

Has anyone spotted this guy? He's been parked-up on Friern Road for the last week or so. I had a word - he says he's insurance broker who works in West Norwood - and he's just living in the caravan temporarily whilst he has a new bathroom fitted.. but I'm not so sure..

No, no - please come and park outside my house. Pleeeeease! Actually - to hell with it - come and park inside my house. If you can let me know the rough dimensions of your van I'll roll-up the rug and shift the telly.

For the sake of clarity, could everybody please state their age - and whether or not they've ever ordered from a Boden catalogue - before they start their post? Mrs *Bob* is pleased to be down from the roof at last (I've taken her off 'lead watch').. but I suppose I'll never see that Enya CD again.

I for one am deeply dismayed that Campervan Man has failed to conform to stereotype - as portrayed in Channel 4's totally fair and balanced documentary shown earlier this year. I can only hope that the next van that parks-up is chock-full of freckly pink misogynists sporting 'war hair' and thick Irish accents.

I've just popped over with a sausage casserole - and offered them the use of our (downstairs) toilet - on alternate Tuesdays. They seemed grateful, but it was hard to tell with 'No Limits' playing at full blast on their Bang and Olufsen system.

rubyshoes Wrote: ------------------------------------------------------- If we all > decided to take that route in life, can you > imagine.... But what would be the point in expending any energy whatsoever in trying to imagine such a pointlessly unlikely scenario?

James - could Tony Blair - or David Cameron - also be to blame for the lack of a reliable P13 service.. ? I expect so.

Ms B Wrote: ------------------------------------------------------- > Similar to response to JJF. If my neighbour > thumped his son for keying a car, I'd congratulate > him. I don't remember me or my brother, or any of our friends - keying any cars when we were young. I suppose our parents must have brought us up properly in the first place, or something stupid and old-fashioned like that. Still - congratulations to these neighbours for crap parenting in the first place, and then congratulations for them needing to dish-out a sound beating as a result of their own failings as parents - and congratulations to you for congratulating them. Cigars all round.

Family ties are strong for me - and work-wise, it would be very hard to make a fresh start. But if I could - in another life maybe - it would definitely be Nunhead.

Apologies.. I was off me 'ead on Skittles when I wrote that

With the children's homeopath, you get a free lollipop with your water.

It's the most favourite of bizarre questions. Where would you want to live - if virtually all the key factors that determine where you want to live - don't apply. Let's see.. In a house made of candy on top of Ben Nevis? Atlantis? And I almost forgot.. Australia (of course)

I believe the traditional ingredient in 'sweets' is 'sugar'.

He's got a lot on his plate at the moment

Actually, more like this..

Annette Curtain Wrote: ------------------------------------------------------- > ( while he sits laughing and feeding the baby ) What.. surely you don't mean..

I heard he's had to go in for emergency dimple surgery. It's all very sad. Crossing my fingers for you, Sean.

jamesm Don't listen to these old, bald and bitter men. Get yourself down to a proper stylist and don't come out until your wallet is at least ?40 lighter. Because you're worth it.