cashewnut

We did spread out evening courses and I thought that helped. However I have a friend who did intensive courses who thought that they were much better! To be honest I think the thing that makes the most difference is how much effort you put in. I think so long as at least a couple of people in the group are quite proactive in terms of getting an email list up and running early and arranging get togethers etc then the group is likely to start bonding. The next most important thing is probably location - if you all live quite close together it helps a lot.

Over 6 months on from the classes most of the group get together once a week, and it's not unusual for me to see someone or other from the group on several other days as well. We're constantly on email with each other asking stupid questions and sharing small successes and disasters. Cyberia's post made me sad. They have also been a great support in times of need. Since I had to go into hospital suddenly last weekend people from my NCT group have: - come round to play with the baby while my husband worked from home - lent me a an excellent breast pump so I could maintain supply in hospital and express while too sore to feed (and brought me round a steriliser) - brought round food for baby to eat when supplies were getting low - brought cake and strawberries - come round every day to cheer me and the baby up (even though I had full time help from mum/mum-in-law) - given me the feeling that anything else they could have done they would have done!! We have also got hold of a second hand double buggy so that we can take each other's babies out for walks when someone is under the weather. So purely on that basis YES it's been worth it (and let me take this opportunity to say THANK YOU). But also I was a bit of a bury-my-head-in-the-sand type when it came to childbirth so I found the classes really useful in preparing me for what was actually going to happen. The classes here in East Dulwich are great, and provide a comfortable environment for endless questions. Sign up for classes at Trossachs Road for a wonderful teacher - well-informed and a lovely person (if they are still available next year?!). Having said this I do know of people who did not bond with their groups (in fact we 'adopted' two of them into our group!). So I'm not sure if they would have felt that the huge expense was worth it. Edited to add: You can meet other mums on the forum and the 'bumps' lists are great, but it does feel a bit like speed-dating.

We swaddled from the beginning until about 12 weeks. Swaddled for all naps and overnight. We got a couple of these: http://www.amazon.co.uk/Summer-Infant-SwaddleMe-Small-Flutter/dp/B0035ER1F0/ref=sr_1_1?s=baby&ie=UTF8&qid=1340789486&sr=1-1 Looks like a straight-jacket but it's pretty effective. She always escaped from normal blankets and only escaped from this a couple of times. At 12 weeks we started unswaddling one arm at a time, one nap at a time then once she was fully out switched to a sleeping bag. We had a lot of trouble with naps early on and I really think this helped. When we got it at about 3 weeks I remember little cashew slept from about 11 til about 5am and I thought it was an amazing miracle but of course that was a one off!

This was our first stop South of the river so I don't know many secret corners, but you could think about Borough/London Bridge/Bermondsey? Looks like the night bus Eltham Palace goes through London Bridge, and not sure about daytime transport but seems likely you can get out that way easily by train. It's a lively area and a short hop into the centre... You'd probably be looking at a much smaller pad compared to ED though.

East Dulwich (to me) feels like a little haven away from the city with nice parks and friendly streets full of families. Is that what you're looking for? I absolutely love living here now, but I'm not sure I would have wanted to live here when I first came to London as a graduate. If you're into pubs and cafes then it's great, but if you want to feel a part of the big city and/or want to be out all night clubbing then have a think about whether you'd prefer somewhere different. We are pretty well connected here with buses but there are parts of London where you can walk home from central London if you need to or go out to more exciting venues locally. More expensive though so you make a trade-off in terms of space. Also I admit that since moving here I haven't explored the local nightlife fully!

Brilliant series. Thanks!

Just checking - have you tried the pushchair on the icandy cherry? It's not flat and is officially recommended after 6 months I think, but if you're considering a maclaren and the little one can't lie flat anyway... We have the icandy cherry and little cashew was much happier once I put her in the seat cos she could see everything, and it does recline quite far back.

We've given our little one normal weetabix and ready brek from around 6 months. Sometimes we add pureed fruit to the ready brek. My other half has some professional expertise in this area so I'll ask him about others - I know he's told me in the past that some of the stuff you'd think is fine is actually terrible.

Are there any famous people on the forum? Are any of you secretly famous? (oh the irony!)

That doesn't sound like too much daytime sleeping to me... we usually need a little catch up in the afternoon if we have much less than 1.5 hours at lunch. Agree with hellosailor about spacing feeds. Weirdly mine seems ready to consume any volume of solids/milk late morning and evening, but won't touch breakfast until an hour or so after her first milk feed. You might find things get better when you introduce proteins (if you haven't yet). That is supposed to help overnight sleep I think?!

Other people's suggestions sound sensible and probably worth following them first, but the other thing to think about is daytime sleep. I had some issues with earlier waking around this age and a slightly shorter morning nap (30mins) and later long lunchtime one seemed to help a lot (12.30). She'd dropped her afternoon nap already.

Ha ha ha yes there were a few shouts of "get off the East Dulwich Forum you're totally addicted" but we were also having a parallel conversation about the East Dulwich Forum and I wanted to show it off to visiting 'outsiders'. Two of the people there were one of three siblings and thought it was great for them but terrible for the parents. Several mothers of three children have told me not to have three as it's too much hard work. I don't think they had very involved partners though. Take the point about it being a bit of a weird conversation - it was a lighthearted discussion and obviously we are not planning our lives off the back of it!

We're sat here with our dinner guests debating whether it's better to have two or three children. Any contributions from the collective wisdom of the forum?

I haven't flown yet but did a bit of research recently for a long haul flight we have in August. BA and Virgin both seemed to be widely recommended. I booked with Virgin in the end and found the 'live chat' feature on their website really useful. I was able to confirm that there was a bassinet available in real time when I booked my flight, and book it as soon as the payment went through. I think the nine-month old should be able to fit in the bassinet - ours will be a similar age.

Good to know. Thanks!

Brilliant idea. If you do it well it could be really popular. The Rex in Berkhamsted is a great example. It's a small town but the films sell out months in advance cos the cinema is so lovely. The bar's open throughout the film and seats in the stalls have tables. Check out the picture of the queue in 'Gallery'. http://therexberkhamsted.com/ Does have the massive advantage of being in a restored art deco cinema though...

You can put things in the freezer for 72 hours.

it wasn't on...

I seem to remember that it might have been cancelled for half term.

I love that film! Great soundtrack too. Saffron can the differences you mention explain differences in behaviour or are they physical? Personally (I think) I would be less worried about stereotyping for a boy. I take your point about fancy dress (and macho types), but generally I think the female stereotype is more limiting.

I don't like it when people suggest that there are already differences in behaviour between baby boys and baby girls. I think this is mainly for two reasons: - I don't believe it. My daughter is certainly not more placid than her male peers, and instinctively I think that innate differences between boys and girls are overstated even for grown ups. - I don't like the idea of my daughter hearing, as she grows up, that people expect her to behave differently to boys. I think the female stereotype can be quite limiting and I don't want her to conform to it. I'm interested to hear from people with older girls. Am I being silly? If there are differences how and when do they manifest themselves? (Talking pre-puberty here really.) Or what are the best ways you found to avoid social pressure on your daughters to become a pink girly girl?

Pills

Thanks everyone, that's some really good advice. Sounds like a bit of a gender divide going on - which I suspect we'll see between us too! The sun/rain cover does sound useful though. Although we have a trip to California I suspect most of the time we use it will be in the rain if this year's weather is anything to go by!

Thanks bobby's bear that's really helpful. What stops her from flopping around when she naps on your back? I tried one on and it seemed to leave her very free to move around.

I'm trying to decide on a new sling/carrier as the little one is getting too big for the baby bjorn. I've read some of the other threads on here/reviews and the Ergo always seems to get a good press. Just wondering about the advantages compared to a more structured back-pack style carrier. Things to consider: - We do quite a lot of hiking (or used to!) and we have a trip to California planned for when the baby is 10 months old (yes I'll be back on here for other advice nearer the time!). - We really want her to be able to nap in it - which carriers are good for napping?! - We want something that'll last - is the Ergo any good for long walks after 18 months? (are any of them?) - I'm small and other half is quite big. Thanks!