Scruffy Mummy

Interesting how the yummy daddies seem to have gotton off scot free in this whole debate eh?? Most parents I know are highly embarrassed when their kids kick off in public places and try to get them out of there are quickly as possible! I have some lines of behaviour that musn't be crossed for my sprog - running around in cafe's or resaurtants isn't on - particularly when people are carrying hot drinks! If a tantrum is coming on, it's time to grab a coffee and go outside! Yet, in order to keep sprog amused and from be a pain, we've played games like spot the bus or the taxi out the window in Cafe Nero. Harmless and fun you might think. Last week, I was subjected to the dirtiest look from a young woman several table able every time sprog said 'look bus!' in a slightly loud voice (but not a shout or scream). I tried to get him to speak more softly and he did tone it down - but then I realised that it was something about our mere being anywhere near in her space that was annoying her. Anyway, some people are really rude and inconsiderate and they have kids. Some people are really rude and inconsiderate and they don't have kids. Really rude people are annoying - whatever there class, creed, ethnicity, or status as parent/non parent. End of story.

yes - most people with young children don't have the freedom that child-free people have to go out any ole' night they please so I think it's abit mean spirted to moan about parents going to cafe's/child-friendly pubs etc during the daytimes!!! I do take my kid to the park/playground - at least 3 hours of our days together are spent outdoors and it's nice after a trip out to be able to go to a child-friendly cafe/pub, met a friend and have a coffee or lemonade for the MAX 30 minutes that we have before the kids go bonkers and want to escape. At the end of the day, alot of people move to East Dulwich because it's a family/child friendly zone - the businesses here recognise this and tend to be family friendly. Deal with it or start a child-free restaurant/cafe/bar etc.

Um, I think there's a good over 60's lunch club down at the pensioners centre in Camberwell.

At last. Someone who is posting on the forum who actually knows what they are talking about instead of just spouting a load of BS and aimless speculation! :)

Do they sell cheap and cheerful knickers or socks??? Probably not from the sounds of it. Any establishment in Lordship Lane that does this will get my vote.

I heard it was being run by the same people who run the cafe in Russell Square Park - or maybe it was that it was built by the same people who built the Russell Square Cafe??? Anyway - the location is fairly central to both the Peckham Rye Park and to the common - so that I guess people using the Common to play sports on, the people going for walks in the Park, the parents using the 1 0'clock club, etc will all have good access to it.

This thread has reminded me why I never visit this forum anymore - I was only lured back by a friend who told me about this thread! I have to say I have never met anywoman who has set out to be deliberatly exhibtionist while breastfeeding her baby - sometimes though, I know that particuarly in the first few weeks when I was getting the hang of the whole breastfeeding thing and didn't quite sort out the easier tops to where when breastfeeding I probably showed abit more boob than neccessary - not because I was trying to be assertive or a militant breastfeeder - I was just bloodly knackered, and in a fog with a little creature who seemed to want to be fed constantly. Two points I'd like to make - I used to work with people with learning difficulties and we would go out on outings to cafe's and other public places. Sometimes we'd get dirty looks from other people because people feel uncomfortable with people with learning disablities and sometimes our clients would do harmless but socially unacceptable things (eating with mouth open, making strange noises). Should, like years ago, people with disablities just stay inside because some people say eating in a cafe with people with disablities puts them off their food?? Also, many moons ago, as a student, I worked in a public library part time. Many people came into the library - mums with babies (and sometimes the babies had pooey nappies), older people with in-continence problems, homeless people who weren't able to shower. Did we library staff get outraged and write to local papers (the equivalent of web forums today) about smelly people? No we did not. We smiled and got on with serving everyone - because ultimately, smelly people aren't hurting anyone. You may ask what this has to due with this debate - and it is this. I doubt many of you complaining will be a tired out breastfeeding mum someday in the future. BUT, I can guarentee that someday in the far future, some of you people moaning about how a burping baby or a tired out breastfeeding mum will be that older person who has dementia or has gone incontinent or you might become disabled. Wouldn't you like to be treated with kindness and understanding by our children (who we are now breastfeeding) instead of mocked and ridiculed?? Just think about how you want to be treated by the next generation before you want to banish them and their knackered mums to room 101!!!

Violence against girls and women is sadly an everyday experience - a friend of mine's 13 year old daughter (in the South East but not in this area) was walking home in the early evening and was dragged into a field by 4 blokes who intended to rape her. Micralously, she managed to struggle free and escape. Most violence against children and teenagers (girls and boys) is carried out by people they know (i.e. family members, boyfriend, etc)- and cases of domestic violence, sexual abuse in the home,rarely make the news. That doesn't mean it isn't important or didn't happen. Rape and sexual assault by strangers does happen as well - although isn't as common as abuse/violence within the home. Again, sadly, unless something takes the story 'out of the ordinary' the press won't cover it.

Yes, I totally get what you are saying and I totally understand the challenges you face!! It's just that you could get questions selling cakes under the charity brand of the WI - that's all! And it's fair enough really for people to know if they are buying cakes under a charity brand where the money is going. But it sounds great and I'll definately drop in to get more info about what you are all up to. And Bawdy - Nan looking forward to buying a cake to support the community nursery!

Bawdy-nan - yes, I agree and if I didn't already know about the wider aspects of the WI, I would have had the same attitude! If this branch follows up with some of the campaigning and community service angle of the WI, I'll be in! Would be good to have some support and co-ordination of fundraising efforts for small local community groups and charities for whom even a few hundred quid will make a difference to the services they provide

Despite their old fashioned image, the WI have a long traditional of campaigning and community service alongside their role in promoting crafts and baking while providing a social network for members. Many branches also respond to local emergencies and crisis in local areas with blankets, first aid, food etc. I've always found the branches I've worked with really well organised and co-ordinated in their responses to the needs of local communities - ready to get stuck in and volunteer. And many of their political campaigns are around important issues such as Fairtrade.

Good stuff guys! Think the young WI thing is great - just a quick word of warning to maybe seek advice from WI headquarters about the raising money for charity issue if it were to come up on the day (I know you haven't said this) - it just that as the group is so new, you probably aren't yet legally consituted as an offical member branch. Therefore, technically if you were to say that the money raised from the cake sale is going to charity, it might not be strictly true. However, if the money is going to WI headquarters (to be then re-imbursed to you when you are a branch) then it's probably ok. Sorry to be pendantic. I don't want to be a wet blanket but I've got alot of experience of fundraising and charity law and wouldn't want your enthusaism to be shot down if someone was to complain on the day. It's also that the WI do also raise funds for local causes through bake sales and the like all over so people might also get confused about the purpose of the stall. Just a gentle piece of advice - it's not really a WI thing to run against other local charities or try to give them a run for their money. Community service is a big part of the WI ethos/mission and can I suggest that maybe a percentage of the ED WI takings go to a local charity??? Just a suggestion - I'm not part of the group (although I might join) and I understand why you need the funds to get things set up i.e. for the branch membership to the main WI, etc, etc. But it would also set the community service ethos as part of it from the beginning. In the past, I've asked for support from local WI branches to provide tea and coffee making support at charity/community events I've run and they come in and do their thing like a well-oiled machine!! They know their health and safety, they have proper big hot water boiling and they make a mean cup of tea - and all for free as volunteers! The WI is fab in my book!!!

Another poster on another thread pointed out that local businesses are getting lots of free market research from this site - it's a great opportunity for local businesses to get feedback from customers and improve their business. Look, you'd have to paid a consultant alot of money to interview and collate comments from your customers and here you can get it all for free! I noticed that the service at EDD has really gotton loads better since the recent fracas about the egg situation and frankly, I didn't think it was that bad to begin with. So as a result, their profile has been raised, they probably got more customers popping in to see what it's all about and they've learnt something that has improved the business. It's the businesses that no-one can be bothered about mentioning or discussing that I worry about!

Hope and Greenwood Neverending Story Bookshop Pretty Traditional The greek shop/deli/'supermaket' across from EDD Review Bookshop in Bellenden Peitout in Bellenden Cake shop on Saturdays on Bellenden Road, 157 i think oh and controversially, I'll also add Cafe Nero - staff always friendly and quirky, whenever me or the sprog has spilled something, they've been very gracious and clean up without sighing or being narky. When I was sitting down, one staff member clearing up noticed that my coffee had over-spilled over unto the saucer and offered to make me another one.

Just saw a notice in Hope and Greenwood today- they have announced their own brand FAIRTRADE products they are now selling!! HURRAH! HURRAH!

One useful thing might be to look at shops which do seem to have a high level of customer satisfaction. For instance, Hope and Greenwood. The owners rarely work behind the counter now but the staff are extremely welcoming and have obvisously been given alot of training in customer service and told how to greet, serve and deal with customers. You can tell that the staff have been primed on working and serving children as well. I always feel like they are happy to have you in the shop - glad for the business even though they are clearly doing well and packed out at peak times. Staff are also primed to help women with buggies and always hold the door open which is incredibly thoughtful. My only sadness is that they I've never seen Fairtrade Chocolate sold there - another user on this forum alerted me to problems with non-fairtrade choc so I try to only buy fairtrade now. However, at least I can buy their lovely ice cream!! Also the Neverending Story Bookshop is very welcoming and helpful. The owner there has a background in management and working with people and that really shines through. There are lots of courses out there in customer service - I'm sure lots of government funded initiatives for SME's which would provide local shopkeepers with free or subsdised training in customer service issues. Why not check with the Learning and Skills Council??

I have to say that he has been friendly enough with me and even joked with me and staff on one occasion. But the layout is a problem and that chocolate egg display was a major accident waiting to happen - in fact, I think if they had done a proper risk assessment, they would have noticed that it was at high risk for toppling over! Could have been a major lawsuit if the eggs had toppled onto a precious East Dulwich offspring!

Yes, I've heard Goose Green primary has become quite a good school now. And it's nearer Charter School so if you live nearer Goose Green you have a better chance of getting in to Charter I guess. A friend of mine went to visit Dog Kennel hill and was told the head is leaving soon. I think the best thing is to go and visit these schools anyway. I think it takes a while for a schools reputation to catch up with current reality - and you don't really know unless you go and visit whether you like it or not. Or whether it would suit your kid.

The crucial question is - were the eggs Fair Trade Chocolate or not?

Uh, how about good and inexpensive cotton knickers?? Socks?? You know, exciting everyday goods that don't cost the earth and that even Farmers don't stock. Yes, I know some people are dying for yet another independent store where you can spend ?20 on a cupcake tin but I really would like somewhere I can get some socks.

Maybe because: a) St Anthony's is over-subscribed as well with real (and fake) catholics from near and far queing up to send their kids there and b) Because some of us don't want lie about believing in the holy trinity and go to mass (which is how in effect you need to get in with Fr O'Connor) and teach our kids it's ok to be a hypocrite!

I believe you are in the catachment area for Heber (but don't take my word - ring the school) - according to a previous thread, this school is currently one of the most popular schools after Goodrich - as Goodrich is so over-subscribed and some people say over-hyped but I don't know about that really. Besides, your daughter is only 1 year old and if they do bring in lotteries for primary school places, you could find you've made a very expensive mistake trying to buy into a school nearby. Plus in 4 years time, what was a great school could change - I hear the head is leaving Dog Kennel Hill soon. Both Goodrich and Dog Kennel Hill take from such a small catchment area anyway you'd be chancing it. Heber is on a school that is on the way up - so things are looking good.

Well, it's happened in Brighton already! And there has been alot of protests but it has also had alot of support from people as well. But it will only affect those terribly over-subscribed schools - probably in East Dulwich it would affect Goodrich and Dog Kennel Hill if it will be brought in for primary schools. Althought someone I know said it would only affect secondary schools. However, I think most primary schools in East Dulwich are ok now - I think Henslowe Road is near Heber which has become quite popular and I heard that Heber is doing really well now. Scruffy Mummy http://www.scruffymummy.blogspot.com

No, actually - it isn't untill business see that they can make money from being ethical that they will change sadly! So we have to show them there is a market for ethically produced products. Corporates don't do anything just for altrulism - even the right on brands. There was a programme on one of the news channels about how Fairtrade Bananas have been an economic godsend of the Caribbean - their banana industry was under threat due to some World Trade Directive and the demand for Fairtrade Bananas has had a huge impact. Scruffy Mummy http://www.scruffymummy.blogspot.com

Fairtrade whenever possible - particularly when buying chocolate!! Scruffy Mummy http://www.scruffymummy.blogspot.com