KateW

Hi Emza78, These are just my thoughts, but if I were you, I'd try and push her bedtime back a bit til 7pm (you could move it 15 minutes each night) so she wakes nearer to 7am. At 5 months, she should be able to go for 2 hours from waking, which would put her first nap nearer to 9am. I know you say it goes against the grain to wake a sleeping baby, but it really helped me to establish a good routine with my daughter. I would just allow her a short nap at 9am (30-40 mins) then aim for her big nap around 12pm/12.15pm. That way, you'll be able to establish lunchtime (when she's on solids) around 11.00 and she won't be too tired to have a good feed. She'd then have her big nap and might only need a cat nap later in the afternoon (but no later than 5pm if she's to go to bed at 7pm). My daughter has dropped this late pm nap which they do around this time (assuming a nap schedule as above). My little girl has the same nap times as Supergolden mentions and it really works for us. She is a happy and content little thing nearly all of the time, which has made CC hard as I'm not used to hearing her cry! The guidance I've read says not to do CC before 6 months but I've had friends who've done it slightly earlier to help with the nighttime sleeps. Hope that helps!

Thank you all so much for your very reassuring comments. CC is really tough and it helps to have words of encouragement when I'm at caving in point! Just thought I'd update you all on Day 2 of CC - thankfully a huge success compared to yesterday! Supergolden, I did exactly what you suggested: took her to her room just as she started showing her tired signs, talked and cuddled quietly for 5 minutes, laid her in her cot (she wasn't crying at this point) and left the room. She talked and whinged for a few minutes then started crying. After 10 mins, I went in and sat by her cot, talking soothingly to her for a minute. She stopped crying after a few seconds and just watched me. I then left the room and by the time I had got to the monitor, she was asleep! She slept for 35 mins then woke, cried on and off for 7 minutes then went back to sleep for another hour and 10 minutes! I can't believe it! I know it's only day 2 but it does give me hope that she can do it by herself, with minimal intervention from me. She is currently chatting away in her cot playing with a toy. Many thanks again all.

Hi Supergolden, This is really really helpful, thanks so much. Can I check a couple of things with you? You mention not to do the CC for longer than 45 mins, but what if she isn't asleep by then? Do I pick her up and comfort her to sleep? Or will this defeat the purpose? The reason I ask is that I started the CC today (gulp) and she cried on and off for an hour before she fell asleep (and then slept for 45 mins before waking). You're right in that she needs 2 hours at lunchtime; when I normally cuddle her when she wakes after 35 mins, she falls straight asleep in my arms and will sleep for the rest of the 2 hour nap (some days, if I'm knackered, I'll curl up with her in bed for the rest of the nap and she sleeps just fine. Oh I love those days!). Like you, I figured there wasn't much point doing this for the morning nap and I'm hoping that the skills she'll learn for the lunchtime nap will help her morning nap. She dropped her late p.m. nap a few weeks ago and only needs it now if she's had a rubbish lunchtime nap. (BTW, my neighbour called round 55 mins in to CC today and I burst into tears on her on the doorstep! I thought I was so strong and could handle my little girl crying but it's hard; I know I need to be consistent so I'll really bear in mind what you said. Thanks again).

Has anyone any experience of using controlled crying for naps? My six month old daughter sleeps brilliantly at night (bed at 7pm, sleeps through til 5am ish, quick feed then sleeps til I wake her at 7am) but naps have always been a bit hit and miss. She'll nap in her pram for her morning nap but with her lunchtime nap, she needs a bit more help getting to sleep, then she'll sleep for 35 mins, wake, then I cuddle her and resettle her for the remainder of the nap (usually an hour-hour and a half). She cries if I leave her to go to sleep by herself although sometimes she chats then winges then sleeps. Advice greatly welcomed. Thanks!

We moved our daughter into her own room at 2 months. She was a really heavy breather (!) when she was tiny and was very snuffly and to be honest, she kept me awake! I felt like I'd regained a bit of sanity after we'd moved her; I could go to bed early and read without worrying about disturbing her. It helped that we have a video monitor which meant I could always see her. It also coincided with her only needing one night feed (after her 11pm feed) as before that, it was easy to quickly feed her and pop her back in her crib. With the next one I might be tempted to move them even earlier. At the end of the day just go with your gut; when you feel ready to move her you'll know.

Thanks Sillywoman that does give me hope, providing you aren't about to tell us that you're children are teenagers! :o)

My PND kicked in at about 8 weeks; I had terrible insomina due to paniky thoughts about EVERYTHING baby related. It was truely awful. The point where I realised it was more than just exhaustion and the baby blues was when I had a night of very dark thoughts (ending my life). I was staying with my Mum and Dad at the time (due to army husband away overseas - on operational tour for 6 months, which was a huge contributing factor I think) and when I told my Mum the next day (probably the lowest and saddest point in my life) we both realised it was time to seek help. I saw my wonderful old family doctor who was amazing, prescribed me very low dose anti-depressants (10mg) and I never looked back! I finished my course of anti-d's last week and am now the happy mum of a delightful 5 and a half month old little girl. It was the worst time of my life but we've come out the other side smiling!

Fuschia, I just spat coffee over the keyboard reading that you're 'Hungarian with shite horses'! This surely has to be the post of the day?!!

Aah Fuschia and Moos, you both made me laugh so much. As I slap on the Touch Eclat in a feeble attempt to cover the dark circles, it does make me smile to think that I'm not alone and frankly it's images of you both like that which get a girl through those tough nights! Thanks ladies x

Moos, that was me at 5.30am this morning...

I love this. Will endeavour to remember when my little lady starts talking. Thanks Fuschia.

Good idea Pickle, small steps indeed. I've swapped milk chocolate for dark chocolate (!) as I vaguely remember reading somewhere that a small bit of dark chocolate each day is good for the heart! Oh, and I've cut out my piece of toast smothered with butter first thing in the morning which was a lovely habit I got into just after I'd had my little girl. Personally, I love the 'Sandi Toksvig' half diet in which she just eats half of what she used to (half the doughnut instead of a whole one, half an eclair etc etc). Love it!

I was in a similar position: my husband is in the army and was overseas until our daughter was nearly 4 months old (she's now almost 5 months). I breastfed her til she was three and a half months (with an expressed bottle feed every other day since she was 4 weeks old) and apart from the odd feed given to her by my mum, I did all the feeding. I was DESPERATE for hubby to be able to do the late feed so I could catch up on some sleep. We tried him feeding her at all different feeds but she cried after a few gulps and I ended up taking over. HOWEVER, we perservered and I made sure I was out of sight whilst he fed her. He also cuddles her close like I do and makes sure he winds her properly and she's now happy to take a feed from him. Hooray! Hang in there, it took a lot longer than I thought it would and it took a lot of patience but we got there and I'm sure you will too. Good luck.

Please excuse my ignorance on this, but at what age do little ones move to a stroller/light weight pushchair? My little girl is 5 months old with good neck and upper body strength. She used to fall asleep easily in her pram when out for walks but is now far too frustrated at being on her back, not able to see the outside world! I'm sure she'll love being in a pushchair but I have no idea what the rule of thumb is on this. We've got a pilko pramette which does convert into a pushchair but it's not the lightest bit of kit in the world so I'd like to get something lightweight that we can throw in the car for outings. What would people suggest? I'm not very strong so something lightweight would be ideal and my husband is keen for something with the wheels quite far apart (as the pilko wheels are close together and he always catches his feet which drives him loopy). Any advice gratefully received.

Have you tried MAM teats/bottles and dummies? (Google MAM bottles) They have a different shape to a lot of others (flatter, more like nipple). I've lent some of mine to friends who've had great success getting their babies to take bottles when previously they wouldn't. My daughter now naps in her cot for all daytime naps (but I still try and get out for a walk for one of them so she sleeps in the pram) but this was only after doing the Baby Whisperer shush/pat (for up to 4 months) then pick up/put down for 4 months+. This has worked a treat and it now takes less than 2-3 minutes for her to settle in her cot. Like you, I wasn't opposed to controlled crying but my daughter has never had a problem getting to sleep at night and controlled crying isn't really an option for daytime naps so I went with pick up/put down. Before 4 months, she always either slept on me or in her pram for her naps and I always made sure she had 30 mins at 9am ish, 2 hours at 12pm and 30 mins late afternoon. This meant her bodyclock got used to these regular naps so when I started to put her in her cot, she knew she needed these naps and it didn't take much to get her off to sleep. At her lunchtime naps now, she will sometimes go for a full 2 hours without waking but often still wakes after 35 mins, but then I settle her really quickly and she sleeps for the rest of the nap time with no fuss. Good luck. Hope others can advise on the night time stuff.

Have just forwarded that to the gals from my NCT class. Thanks Polly, it's just lovely x

GHD hair straighteners got rid of my old flatmates nits in one go! (The heat burned the buggers out!) Not sure how old your daughter is so she might not sit still for long but you could always turn it into a 'pamper' session (doing hair, nails etc) and straighten her hair. Just a thought. It worked a treat!

It's really only in the last 2 weeks that my little girl has started feeding well from the bottle; it has taken a lot of practice from us both so I would hang in there. It's not as easy as I thought it would be! My husband is now home after being overseas since she was born and she's not very happy to take her bottle from him yet; she cries and pulls away then when I take over she's fine. It'll take time I know, but he's able to give her more and more each day so we'll just see how it goes. I honestly never thought she'd take more than 3 ounces in a feed and remember being amazed when she took 5oz. Now she guzzles 8oz before bed and I'm sure she'd eat more if I offered it to her but I don't want to overload her little tum. I never managed to express more than 5 oz in one go so like you, she never had more than 5oz EBM. Do you feed her when there are no distractions? I was at an NCT meet-up this afternoon and my daughter was completed distracted by the other babes that it was a real battle to get her to take her feed. I find that being quiet with few ditractions helps her to have a good feed.

I switched our daughter (now nearly 18 weeks old) to formula over a period of about 2 weeks (as a result of post natal depression and my milk quality and quantity dropping). At first I swapped her 2.30pm feed and did this for a week. She would guzzle 2 and a half ounces then would pull off the bottle crying and I thought that meant she'd had enough as I couldn't get her to take more. Then one day I just persisted a bit longer and gave her really good windings (she burped each time) and she went back on the bottle despite the tears, and managed to take 5 ounces. After that I switched one feed per day (she's on a four hour feed routine) and haven't looked back! She is quite petite and has been just below the 9th centile since she was born but to give you an idea, this is what she's currently taking: 7am: 5-6 ounces 10.30am: 6 and a half ounces 12pm: 2 ounces (just before her lunchtime nap) 2.30pm: 5-6 ounces 6.30pm: 8 ounces (she guzzles this feed!) 11pm: 5 ounces (she then wakes between 4.30-6am when I split the 7am feed) She is now much more efficient at feeding and takes on average 20 minutes. I gave her EBM for one feed per day from when she was 4 weeks old so she would get used to the bottle. Some days she takes a bit less per feed but is always hungry and feeds well at 6.30pm. If she has less at one feed, chances are she'll be hungry for then next one and takes a full feed then. If my daughter cries during a feed it means she needs winding and once she has burped she usually goes straight back on no fuss. If she's nearing the end of the bottle and cries then but doesn't go back on after winding then that means she's had enough. I don't worry about this now, some days she's hungrier than others just like us I guess. Hope that helps.

Thanks folks, that's really helpful!

Apologies for my ignorance, but please can someone explain to me about baby swimwear? I have a 4 month old daughter who we'd like to take for a splash around in the pool sometime soon but I have no idea about what to dress her in. How does the nappy thing work?!

Hang in there Mima, you WILL get through it, no matter how bad it seems right now. My daughter is 4 months old now but when she was 6-7 weeks old I really went into meltdown. I had postnatal depression and it was just awful. Everyone (with very good intentions) kept telling me it would get better but that is so hard to believe when you are hormonal and sleep deprived. Just take each day as it comes, put one foot in front of the other and just survive the day. You will come out the other side smiling, I promise you.

Instead of forking out for a pregnancy pillow, I used a rolled up double duvet (tied with ribbons either end) and it worked a treat (same principle/shape as the 'official' ones). Maybe give that a go?

Womanofdulwich - indeed I have shown all the normal worries and concerns of being a new mother and far from being ultra confident (which I'm not) I found that reading the books (Gina etc etc) caused me huge anxieties and instead of going with my natural instincts, I worried/worry constantly that my baby isn't doing what the books say she should be doing. I have suffered awful post natal anxiety and one of the things that helped me to get over it was putting my books away and understanding that all babies are different. I'm not quite sure why you felt the need to criticise me for expressing my opinion, but that is all it is; my opinion. I'm sure that ladyruskin is more than capable of realising that.

I second what Emily said. Burn the lot of 'em. You will find your own way and that will be what's best for you and for your baby.