Gingergossip

So its great to go out cycling, I love it. Not enough to need Lycra fetish wear though. So today I've been dodging family cycling expeditions. All you need is two unable to control ED adults and two small kids to monopolise the entire pavement. My elderly neighbor was panicked into stepping out in the road and having a near miss with a car. Also this week. I had a dangerous encounter with an infanticide machine AKA a cargo bike, barrelling down the pavement on Underhill road. I suppose it makes a change from daring the bus on Lordship Lane squash your little cargeteers. This isn't Amsterdam or Copenhagen. This is South London with plenty of crazy drivers who don't give a damn about your green aspirations or 20mph zones!

Jogging explain-ed. Repeated running causes frequent micro and even macro-concussion (https://www.saltyrunning.com/its-serious-running-and-concussions/). This leads to chronic brain damage. So the longer you run and the more frequently you run, the more of a drooling window licker you become!

I just had a jogger phlegm up outside my house. My neighbor down the road has CCTV- I'll post the offenders picture if I can get it. Disgusting pig! Clearly running (and cycling) shuts off the blood supply to moral organs of the brain. The only answer is to just ban them. UK Gov is leaning in that direction because so many people cant behave sensibly. For the groups hogging the entire pavement a taser is the only answer. Someone said to me that you cant expect children to understand. I don't, I expect parents to be parents and stop using their kids (and dogs) as an excuse.

So Joggers. How about you start respecting a 2m gap? Its not a minority or just arrogant junior hard-ons, it seems a universal joggers right to ignore the 2m gap rule. Why do they think the pavement belongs to them and we should all get out of their way. To them it doesn't matter if you're 9 or 90, they behave like infants who must have their way. They run straight at you puffing and panting their saliva aerosol all over and tut-tut you for being in their way. What is their special status in the world? They're the agile ones why can't they get out of the way of older people? I've had it with these self-righteous aggressive little people. Get off our narrow pavements!

We need so much more of this. Get out those brushes tonight!

How mad is lock-down making you. Are you getting to know your partner in a way you hoped you would not?

I watched in horror a man picking his nose in my local Day Lewis pharmacy. His name is J.....

1. Stop shopping as a couple or a family. It makes queues longer and increases contact time. 2. Don't touch it if you aint going to buy it. 2. Your children are controllable and you can stop them running too close to others- its still legal to say no to a child in ED. Its also legal to say no to a child that isn't yours. 3. A distance of 2 metres is not just bit more than a foot. Its the length of a typical car or about 4 brat scooters. 4. Your dog is a potential carrier so 2 metres distance from others includes you and your poxy dog on a string. Stop tying it up by the shop door! 5. Shop in your own neighborhood instead of emptying others local shops. 6.Get a grip on the facts about social distancing- your opinion, sense of special entitlement and feelings are not a reflection of reality. I know this will be very very (very very) hard for a lot of ED residents to grasp but its not too late to start working on becoming an adult. Your right to be an idiot has been temporarily suspended.

I've been paying way over the odds for nail varnish remover since living in ED- what a relief. Bying petrol by the half litre is a bitch!

My street is unhealthy. It's filled with idiot parents looking at their iphones and not looking out for their kids. They live in a world of social media induced paranoia and have no sense of actual risk. They only feel safe bolted into a 4x4 armoured car guzzling fuel and destoying the health of the wheezing red-eyed street urchins that clutter their roads. No doubt thier children will need gated communities and epipens in case they become "offended". Southwark is responsible for brexit -the whole country knows it, everyone in the EU knows it. Stop lying.

taxation on cultivation, shameful. Our gardens are an eccologial haven for wild life and a sponge for rainwater that would otherwise be filling the drains to bursting point. Gardens are also great at scrubbing co2 from the atmosphere. Southwark should be paying us for creating green space. Yes your sevcies are changing from a bit crap to utter crap.