Brendan

What do Celestial do anyway?

Kinda puts problems like the environment into perspective when you think that we may just inadvertently bugger up the very fabric of reality. http://www.newscientist.com/channel/fundamentals/mg19626313.800?DCMP=NLC-nletterbanner&nsref=mg19626313.800 And another on a different topic closer to home for this forum. http://www.newscientist.com/blog/technology/2007/11/dont-flame-me-bro.html?DCMP=NLC-nletterbanner&nsref=blogtech

How does one nick the lead off the roof of a public building without being spotted? You have to at least admire the ingenuity.

Take sleeve out of the cd cover Attached to monitor using Tools ? Options - Blu Tack Adjust screen size and resolution to fit.

I found it funny too. In a cringe worthy kind of way. Problem is it clashes with Never Mind the Buzzcocks and Lead Balloon.

I wondered what was going on this morning. Bastards! People started nicking the manhole covers in South Africa about 5 years ago. You have to watch out when you walk down the grass covered pavements as you can't see where they were and you can very easily trip in one and hurt yourself quite badly. As my 77 year-old father recently found out. The people to blame are the scrap metal merchants buying the stuff.

'77 - Good vintage.

A man gets home and announces to his wife, ?Honey, I?ve won the lottery. Why don?t you go upstairs and pack a bag.? ?Oh wow!? Says his wife, ?Should I pack for the mountains or the beach?? ?I don?t care.? He replies, ?Just fuk off.?

I was just about to post a moan about corporate and political euphemisms.

There?s more poetry west of the Rhine.

mockney piers Wrote: ------------------------------------------------------- > Of course Mark Twain was a pseudonym, perhaps it > was really ..err.. George Orwell? ;) Perhaps he is researching for a book that tracks the adventures of a sprightly orphan on the Mississippi. The narrative is told using the medium of personal data collected from credit card payments for large quantities of white wash, river-raft tickets and his aunt?s child benefit applications.

I would like to know where I am supposed to find his phone number. Wikipedia perhaps?

What scares me about integrated cards is that we are just one step away from a computer program going through the following process a million time a second: Customer Identified (Race, Sex, Age, Education, Asset Value, Nationality, Criminal Record, Occupation, Recent Movements) entering platform 1 of station X ? Recent purchase packet of salted crisps ? available credit ?Y ? Previous retail habits analyzed - Search product correlation database ? Products identified ? Deploy sensory suggestions for purchase of soft drink Z ? likely retail outlet station kiosk ? Change suggestive advertising features at kiosk to fit Customer buying/voting profile. Now think of how that could be used by forces less benign than corporate greed.

So I just got back to my desk after a meeting. The office is completely empty and silent except for an unanswered phone bleating out a ring at regular intervals. There is a solitary pink post-it note stuck on my monitor which reads ?Mark Twain called. Pls call back.? I feel like I?m in the opening scene of an episode of the twilight zone.

I think snorky was reffering to an article in the Mail a few years ago. Apparently they were coming over here, taking your jobs and eating the queen's swans.

Swan tastes horrible.

It?s one of those new ?Lad?s Mags? that the newsagents can?t decide whether to put on the top shelf or not.

Can I just add, I am not a violent person at all. Quite the opposite really. Just at that time and place it seemed like the only reasonable course of action.

What country is it that has that black and white checkered flag? They always win the grand prix.

Wot?s this then? Proposed designs for a new flag for England?

It is a pity that St George?s flag has been hijacked by extremists. I don?t think anyone should have to feel apologetic for being proud of being English. - This coming from someone from 2 very un-English backgrounds. But I have made a conscious choice to live in England and feel it would be downright rude not to lend my support to the national sense of identity. Even if supporting their sports teams has made me age prematurely.

Congratulations!

lol. You couldn't make it up.

When I was a student did a spell of work in a local video shop. The one evening this guy came in and had a go at me because I would only let him get 1 video out at a time (he had been blacklisted for always returning things late). He started doing the whole ?Who do you think you are? You?re just a video store clerk? thing to me. So I punched him. It may have been quite and effective customer service technique as he left quite quickly and 20 minutes later I saw his car pull up with 3 more guys in it. Potential new customers perhaps? I didn?t find out though as I had closed the shop and was in the back room pretending not to be there.

Take a look at the Guardian's home page. Talk about bigging up the whole "giant scorpion" thing. Anyway it was a sea scorpion which weren't even arachnids. I'm sure you would have been more scared if it than it would have been of you.