Brendan

Aaawww, precious. To be fair I?m a bit narky this morning as I?m fucking hungover.

Oh fuck off! Compared to Labour and the especially the Tories they look practically saintly.

Financial arrangements where it is pretty much accepted that you are setting the recipient up to fail and consequently default into paying you off perpetually = Loan-sharking. I?m not denying that they overspent, so has Britain. But this, ?serves then right?, ?they?ll get what they deserve? attitude is fucking distasteful.

How dare you cast such aspersions upon our lords and masters Huguenot! And then further challenge the goodly faith of their proponents. Blasphemy! Loan-sharking is only bad if it is done by ne?er-do-wells not if it is done by our respectable magnanimous ruling financial elite. Then it is business and our ultimate salvation. Hallelujah!

Not keen. That sort of thing always lands you in trouble with the ladies.

You are of course referring to Pratchett?s Disc World which travels through space on the back of 4 giant elephants standing on the back of a turtle. It is not the world though, that is to say our world which is by all accounts a lot stranger.

I've read that, or something like it before. Was it Douglas Adams or Terry Pratchett or somesuch?

No but his brother did come to a sticky end in mysterious circumstances involving a vacuum cleaner, a packet of jammy dodgers and a Dire Straits LP. I don?t think that side of the family were ever really cut out for careers in the secret service.

I had an uncle who died in suspicious circumstances involving those very items.

I think it hinges on the difference between a service the government will offer me which I will find useful but is nevertheless optional or an enforced registration system which validates my existence and criminalises me by default if I choose not to participate.

So long as you remember to pass the koutchie on the left hand side.

Not all economies are based around a centralised financial services industry either.

We do have to keep in mind that this is a time of electioneering and therefore this ?Fear the hung parliament? spin should be treated with the bucket of salt that anything any of the major parties spew forth at the moment warrants. In reality it could be a problem if there is a lack of good will amongst MPs to work toward the common public good. This is a genuine possibility but not a valid reason to vote against your conscience. And hopefully if MPs realise that their votes aren?t so guaranteed they may be forced to represent their people rather than their party.

Preposterous! We don?t let people drive on the opposite side of the road if they fancy now do we? Who knows what manner of chaos will befall the civilised world if we allow this sort of thing to continue? They will have to invent a whole new section on dinner invitations where you stipulate in you RSVP which direction your place should be set in. How are the serving staff going to know which side to approach from when there a rows of people eating in opposite directions. Think of the carnage! Think of the madness it will cause with the wine glasses! For gods? sake won?t somebody think of the children!

Hellenic/Greek, tomato/potato. What?s a couple of thousand years when it come to nomenclature, eh? As a Spanish-Englishian surely you should be celebrating doubly.

Why should a government represent what the people want? What would be best for us all is for our new lords and masters to receive their birthright of power. The do know what?s best for the people after all. Think about what you?re arguing. It?s not very far away from saying we may as well get rid of democracy because a dictatorship is more expedient. It is, but it?s not how we do things and if politicians are more interested in attaining absolute power rather than representing and working for the benefit of the people they have no place in a democracy.

The glory of the empire. Wales steals English money. Devolve from the parasites and no surrender to the IRA. God save the queen etc... Happy St Georges day.

He was from Anatolia (as far as I know) which is modern day Turkey but was then a Greek region of the Eastern Roman Empire. He is the patron of many different countries all of which celebrate the day in traditional and often strange ways. The strangest of which is in England where they traditionally celebrate with a sort of self-inflicted, introspective, discomfort about how to properly celebrate. It is as strange as it is fascinating. But what can you expect from a nation that gave the world such marvels as cheese rolling, Viv Stanshall and dogging. And such horrors as morris dancing.

I?ve done it by finding a new beer. Wainwright by Twaites. Blooming marvellous. Beer is one of the things the English do best. Real beer mind. You are unutterably bad at larger but sublimely brilliant in that respectable understated way when it comes to ale. Although as I alluded to earlier the problem with celebrating St George?s day in England is not persecution by the pc brigade or those bastard Irish having the audacity to be better at having a knees up than you. No! It is the inevitability of someone trying to involve morris dancing. There is currently morris dancing going on in the pub garden not 5 yards from my front door. If it goes on for much longer the Purdey is coming down off the mantel.

I had to take out my revolver and shoot the bugger dead for good measure.

I once got American mustard on a pork pie. It was during a spot of unpleasantness on the Blackpool Promenade. I wouldn?t recommend it. It made the Kiss Me Quick completely illegible.

Oh go on, just call it mustard. It is Shakespear's birthday afterall.

Good?o! Happy. St Georges day. How should one celebrate this year then? The Spanish get excitable with red roses today which is nice but probably a little out of character for the English. The trend in latter years to do a sort of red and white coloured version of that Irish day. Now Irish crack does have much to recommend it but when translated into English it has the disadvantage that at some point some bugger always tries to start a morris dance. At least that?s what I think he was trying when he came at me with a stick. I had to take out my revolver and shoot him dead for good measure. We can?t have any of that sort of thing now can we. Anyway I?m rambling? across the downs as it happens on a warm August morning wearing nowt but striped woollen socks (knitted by a professional hurdy-gurdyerist called Deidre) and a pair of sensible shoes as it was Tuesday. Henry! Henry! Bring my drinking spats. We?ve a day here to celebrate.

I will. I will. And looking much forward to seeing you guys I am.

Yeah mate, those and bottle caps, door handles, window latches, biro lids etc.