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So. Something happened to me for the first time in about 10 years today. I was walking down Lordship Lane, on my way to Green & Blue, when a van full of builders drove past and started woolf whistling and yelling and generally making cheeky comments at me. I was so surprised that I just burst out laughing!


So now I wonder - should I have laughed? Or should I have been offended? Is that a degrading/offensive way to treat women, or was it just high spirits?

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https://www.eastdulwichforum.co.uk/topic/10819-whistle-while-you-work/
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How did you feel? There's no reaction that is 'right' or 'wrong' - its how you felt that is important..... if you laughed out loud, perhaps you felt maybe a little flattered? Certainly doesn't seem to be a response of someone who was offended or degraded. Boys in work vans behave in a way they would never behave in their own private cars. In their works van, male bravado and testosterone sometimes takes over....
I didn't feel flattered particularly, just, well, surprised! Perhaps Peckham Rose is right and I should just enjoy laughing in the sunshine. (Though my brother in law is a builder and he'd yell at just about anything remotely female, so Brum your testosterone point may well be valid!)

Well Swagger, going through your list, and as far as memory serves:


Did the van have a mobile number written on the side instead of a landline? Yes

Had some cheeky sods etched "also available in white" into the grime on the back door? Yes!

Was the drivers view obstructed by an enormous accumulation of Ginsters pastie wrappers? Yes, and there were cans too

Did the vehicle leave the unmistakable stench of marijuana in its wake? No

Was one or more of the passengers east european (usually identified by their mono-brow)? I did spot a monobrow

Did you notice a tattoo on any of the passengers necks? No

Was an England flag hanging off the end of their ladder? No

Did they address you as darlin'? Yes. A lot.

Did you notice any cash changing hands? No

And last but not least. Was the vehicle taxed? I didn't see, so we'll say no.


So I think I score 5, making me yelled at by not real builders, but just casuals.


But what does this mean? Should I have laughed more, or less? Or been more or less offended? I didn't realise there were grades of heckle, you see. Please advise.

Swagger Wrote:

-------------------------------------------------------


> Had some cheeky sods etched "also available in

> white" into the grime on the back door?


-------------------------------------------------------


The funniest thing that I've seen written into the grime on a white van was "I wish my wife was as dirty as this van"

You must have been looking rather formy legalbegal for the builders to bother, though after all it's spring innit.


They would be friskier, more fun, and straighter dealing,


than any sleezy,


pizza smelling,


lawyer that I've known or used.


Current lawdogs excepted of course.

jimmy two times Wrote:

-------------------------------------------------------

> now I don't even get tradesman !

>

> Does that mean noone even uses uses your tradesman

> entrance anymore?



This is the second thread I've had to say this on: Do behave! This is not a Carry On film! And there I was thinking I'd get lots of responses about objectifying women and equality of the sexes.


Sigh.

legalbeagle Wrote:

-------------------------------------------------------

And there

> I was thinking I'd get lots of responses about

> objectifying women and equality of the sexes.


Might have to head to the Drawing Room for that - just make sure you don't "fisk" though;-)

Hmm legalbeagle, I'm generally of the opinion that the sort of man who shouts at a woman from a moving vehicle / overhead scaffolding / outside a pub with his mates is the kind of tiny-dicked-can't-get-it-up type who's never likely to get a girlfriend.


And of course it's entirely unacceptable that they should feel entitled to comment on your appearance in that way. However the unpalatable truth is that sometimes for some people it is vaguely flattering to be on the receiving end of a wolf whistle. I am a card-carrying feminist, but even I have been known once or twice to smile when I've thought I wasn't looking all that, and someone else has, erm, expressed their appreciation.


The problem is that it's a fine fine line, and even though I smiled, I'd say it's categorically unacceptable to heckle strangers in the street. It is objectification and that's not ok. But as to whether you should have felt offended - I think that's a matter for you - depends on your mood at the time really, and certainly don't let anyone tell you how you should or shouldn't feel. Although maybe pity for their tiny penises would have been the apposite emotion.

RosieH does make a good point on the "getting a girlfriend" question. Has it ever ever worked for anyone ever that they've heckled a stranger and pulled as a result? I think the answer is probably in the negative. In which case, why bother?


Or is that not the point?

RosieH Wrote:

-------------------------------------------------------

> Hmm legalbeagle, I'm generally of the opinion that

> the sort of man who shouts at a woman from a

> moving vehicle / overhead scaffolding / outside a

> pub with his mates is the kind of

> tiny-dicked-can't-get-it-up type who's never

> likely to get a girlfriend.

>

> And of course it's entirely unacceptable that they

> should feel entitled to comment on your appearance

> in that way. However the unpalatable truth is

> that sometimes for some people it is vaguely

> flattering to be on the receiving end of a wolf

> whistle. I am a card-carrying feminist, but even I

> have been known once or twice to smile when I've

> thought I wasn't looking all that, and someone

> else has, erm, expressed their appreciation.

>

> The problem is that it's a fine fine line, and

> even though I smiled, I'd say it's categorically

> unacceptable to heckle strangers in the street. It

> is objectification and that's not ok. But as to

> whether you should have felt offended - I think

> that's a matter for you - depends on your mood at

> the time really, and certainly don't let anyone

> tell you how you should or shouldn't feel.

> Although maybe pity for their tiny penises would

> have been the apposite emotion.

____________________________________________________________________________


Yes...


But does my bum look big in this ?




W**F

Moos Wrote:

-------------------------------------------------------

> ... And with a graceful little skip, Swagger

> crosses the line.


And all of a sudden I feel I've heard that voice before. Naughty Swagger. Just a tiny bit too confident to be the newbie he appears to be?!!

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