Moving to ED

[dulwichgirl2]

Oh Gingerbeer, I am so glad to see you back here again but sad of course that some scurrilous lying agent has has the temerity to ask you to part with such large amounts of money. I imagine it was someone passing him or herself off as an estate agent in fact. Can you believe that anyone would do such a thing?

So glad you are back though my dear and looking forward to your next query hugely. I wonder if you might want to look at a thread on personal shopping which was very useful for someone new to town. You might enjoy it but still have some queries.

[edhistory]

Gingerbeer,

You need to bring a tape measure with you. Measure a prospective appartment. Then ask the agent to quote the rent as ?/sqft/pm.

John K

[Gingerbeer]

Im thinking it will go better if I look once I get there, brandishing tape measure of course. How could my delightful attitude and charming face possibly inspire swindling? Additionally, I can look deeply into the eyes of any letting agent and whisper "I wont flee the country".

[maxxi]

Just look into their eyes and say "That's bollocks!" whenever quoted anything so ridiculous.

They will then say "Oh, sorry, didn't realise you weren't a complete mug. Here's the real up-front price."

Whereupon you 'tut', shake your head and say "Do me a favour" which should lead to an Estate Agent's idea of the real up-front price (i.e. an outrageously inflated sum but probably as good a deal as you will get).

[Gingerbeer]

I think bollocks is on the list of things a Brit can say but an American cant without sounding ridiculous. Got anything else?

[El Pibe]

Tosh?

[????]

Geezer-mate-w*nker-bloke

[El Pibe]

Stuff and nonsense

Utter Twaddle

Balderdash

Pish and Tish

Or you could go more home grown, Baloney* perhaps?

*is that like spam?

[Jeremy]

"Crap" works well both sides of the Atlantic.

[Help-Ma-Boab]

Fanny Bawz

[Gingerbeer]

Replace baloney with "bullshit" and it will flow off of my tongue with ease.

Balogna is a mixture of ground pork snd lard, and comes pre-sliced like deli meat, so not exactly the same as spam, but equally disgusting. It is also inexplicably shiny/wet/clammy, even after hours of sitting between two slices of bread. *shudders*

[dulwichgirl2]

Gingerbeer, I am sure you are a lady in which case I can advise that the s word is very coarse over here. It and, obviously, the totally beyond the pale c word, are not really acceptable for women. Curiously some much worse words are ok - eg the f word. This all assumes you are under 50 - if over 50, really no swear words are ever appropriate.

I feel sure this view will be deemed sufficiently old fashioned and insufficiently bohemian by the delightful edf members to generate some correspondence on your thread. X

[El Pibe]

Naa, I agree bullshit is probably a bit harsh, even to our much maligned estate agents.

"BS" would definitely sound pretenious from the mouth of a limey, I'm sure you could get away with it though GB.

How about giving them a bermused look of disbelief before spluttering a soft and drawn out "cock offffffff, how much?"

I find it has a much more jarring effect than it's F related cousin.

[Gingerbeer]

Gods balls, you can say cock off but not bullshit? Ill keep that little tidbit handy.

Btw, *cock off* would be downright obscene this side of the pond. But it makes me sorta, you know.... *puppy squirms*!

[Moos]

*peers over pince-nez*

El Pibe! See me.

[El Pibe]

Sorry Miss

[Peckhamgatecrasher]

"... if over 50, really no swear words are ever appropriate."

I've never heard such *$&&$?+!

[????]

Sh1t, that means I've got just over 2 weeks to swear like a fooooking trooper

[Huguenot]

'Bullshit' implies you've been lied to, which just won't do. You can't really do that.

You need to find a word that suggests disagreement with mutual respect. 'Bollocks' is good for that.

[dulwichgirl2]

Haha. But it's true.

Horrible story: in kings waiting for a scan, a grandma and thre year old come in. Three year old uses the f word. Grandma jumps to correct the poor child with, you guessed it, "don't you f' ing use that word fxxx f'ing again".

It was very sad and reminded me of all the things that most depress me in life - luck, chances, birth etc.

[Gingerbeer]

Is it required that all passport photos are laughably ridiculous, or just mine? Consistently.

[El Pibe]

I believe this look is obligatory

 

[Gingerbeer]

That looks shockingly close to mine hair-wise. Like a slow electrocution.

[El Pibe]

as it goes, I'm quite jealous of the shirt.

[Gingerbeer]

If you can pull off wearing that shirt youre more a man than I will ever be. Come to think of it, the shirt doesnt really matter in that respect does it?