Jump to content

internet dating

holloway

By holloway
in The Lounge

 Share

Recommended Posts

Burbage

Burbage

Posted
Posted

It's no less desperate and sad, and arguably a little safer, than popping out on the pull. Moreover, it's no longer a geekish enclave of the friendless, but a mainstream phenomenon which has, more or less, lost what stigma it had.


There are two drawbacks to it. First, the algorithms are better, but still not omniscient, so there's always the chance of your details being suggested to your spouse, boss, aunt or uncle, which may lead to awkwardness. And it won't be long before face-recognition software becomes widespread enough to justify a certain nervousness, especially if, like everyone else, you've lied through your teeth about your height, weight, career and love of the Great Outdoors.


If you don't let those bother you, then there's very little not to get into, unless you're baffled by the concept of dating as such. You pick a few suggestions, exchange a few messages in an attempt to work out what's wrong with them and, if they seem moderately sane and aren't a relative, you meet them somewhere neutral (not a cinema - you need to be able to talk and, more importantly, watch their hands) to refine or amend your conclusions.


Admittedly, there's a wide range of different agendas out there, though. Some just want someone to talk at for a few hours a week, some are after a few minutes in a cheap hotel, some are after a long-term relationship (or, at least, long enough to snaffle a house and half an income), some just want the sort of confidence-boost that they're no longer getting at home and others are in the habit of dining out on forgotten wallets. But that is the same for any form of courtship.


It won't suit everyone, all the same. For some it will involve too much time, money and effort for the questionable benefit to be justifiable. Objectively, given cats are cheaper, more reasonable and much better company than most people, the only real reason we have to court anyone at all is that we're incapable of resisting the reptilian urges of our selfish genes, and this particular urge is only curtailed, rather than proscribed, by law. Happily, if you're able to resist, there's nothing to stop you investing in tweed and ignoring the whole dating thing altogether.

Annette Curtain

Annette Curtain

Posted
Posted

It's just another medium, no ?


Like anything in life; if you look hard enough you'll find it. It's just way easier on the internet.


Social networks or forums like this do get some people together, i've met a few on here and become friends


I know one couple who met via the EDF drinks night, who are now married with a baby boy & V happy indeed.



I imagine it's the same for dating or shagging.

Sue

Sue

Posted
Posted

My sister is in a long-term relationship with a man she met through Guardian Soulmates many moons ago.


I've used internet dating sites in the past. When I've been unattached, I hasten to add :)


I think you have to choose the site carefully - depending on what sort of person you are looking for, of course! I used Guardian Soulmates and Love and Friends, no idea if Love and Friends is still going. I also did actually meet some friends, through their forum, some of whom I'm still in touch with years later.


As Annette C says, it's just another way to meet people. I'd suggest you do meet up with them quickly though rather than having long email correspondences or whatever, as somebody who seems like your ideal person through their writing may not be at all when you meet them, and you might not be attracted to them in the flesh (hoho) at all.


Also you have to meet a hell of a lot of people before you find one where there's mutual attraction :)) , or at least that was my experience, so it depends whether you can be bothered :))


Also you usually know immediately you meet them whether you are interested or not, but in order to be polite you have to stay and talk to them for a reasonable amount of time .....


One thing that did piss me off was many people's obsession with age, which also led to many people lying about their age. I could sort of see why they did it, but it made me wonder what else they were lying about.


I met my current OH at a party in the end, quite unrelated to internet dating.

Otta

Otta

Posted
Posted

I know several couples (including 2 married couples) who met through internet dating, and why not? It's bloody hard to go out and meet people.


I remember a Swedish girl I used to know telling me a decade ago that it was how most people met back home, but in this country there seems to be some stigma about it.


If I found myself single again, I'd definitely give it a go.

woodrot

woodrot

Posted
Posted

holloway Wrote:

-------------------------------------------------------

> i just can't get in to this, seems a bit

> desperate/sad. everyone seems to be doing it

> though. anyone had a go?



no, but go for it. the 'net is only the initial introduction innit, the rest is up to yerselves.

Loz

Loz

Posted
Posted

Sue Wrote:

-------------------------------------------------------

> Mick Mac Wrote:

> --------------------------------------------------

> -----

> > The Guaridan is the last place I'd look.

>

> XXXXXX

>

> I expect The Telegraph and The Mail have lots of

> lovely Thatcher like women for you, then :)


The Telegraph you end up with a Thatcher-like. The Gruin you'd probably end up with some Harriet Harman harridan.


I'd go for the Beano's dating service, based on that.

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now
 Share
Go to topic listing
  • Advertise Here

  • Latest Discussions

    • Sue
      Chango - New local gem alert!

      By Sue · Posted

      A Google search brought up eleven Chango  branches, although they don't all seem to be listed on their website. In the order they came up: East Dulwich, Clapham Common, Mayfair, Wandsworth, City of London, Wimbledon,  Parsons Green, Kensington, Highgate, Richmond, Hampstead. I think it is the positioning of this new branch that has mostly got to me. I accept that they would have to go for where a space became vacant, but Lordship Lane is pretty long, even just the part with shops in,  and choosing to  open a stone's throw away from Chacarero seems mean, to say the least. I wonder if they have made contact with Chacarero. It would be nice to think they had (in a friendly way, obviously!) As regards the apparent  marketing spiel, at least one of the online reviewers also refers to a Chango branch (the Parsons Green one in this case) as a "gem". Probably just coincidence and a word in common use to describe such places. I wouldn't know. I'm ancient 🤣
    • Earl Aelfheah
      Chango - New local gem alert!

      By Earl Aelfheah · Posted

      I like empanadas. I don't think Chango is a massive chain - it's got a few stores all in London I believe (stand to be corrected if I've got that wrong). I don't see a problem with them opening on the Lane personally. I really like Chacarero, but that doesn't mean that they should be immune from competition - if they're successful and open a couple more stores, are we then meant to stop supporting them for being a 'chain'?  That opening post does sound a lot like marketing spiel though. Is the OP perhaps connected to the new business I wonder?
    • Sue
      Chango - New local gem alert!

      By Sue · Posted

      According to what I can see online, Dynamic Vines and Cave de Bruno sell totally different kinds of wine to each other.  Dynamic Vines  "work with independent winemakers who produce outstanding wine using sustainable practices in the vineyard and minimal intervention in the cellar".  Cave de Bruno specialises in French wines and spirits from small independent producers. So two different USPs, and no doubt two different but overlapping customer bases who can afford these wines. Probably different again to the people mainly  shopping for wine at Majestic or the Co op. On the other hand, the two empanada shops appear on the face of it to be selling virtually identical products. But time will tell, won't it? Let's see how they are both doing in - say - a couple of years' time. Impossible, of course, to compare that with how they would have done if there had been only one of them. I just feel more  sorry for the original one than for  the one which can apparently already afford to have a number of shops in places like Mayfair and Highgate. I'm tempted to buy something there every week, and I don't even like that kind of pastry 🤣
    • HeadNun
      Chango - New local gem alert!

      By HeadNun · Posted

      Not only can he turn olive oil into Vermouth, but also water into a wine. A true miracle worker.  I wouldn't say a wine shop sells a wide variety of things - and there are two right next to each other.  And once upon a time, upmarket pizza shops were very specific. So were burritos etc. These Argentinian cornish pasties are clearly becoming mainstream; we should consider ourselves lucky to be witnessing this exciting upward trend within our lifetimes and on OUR HIGH STREET. We can tell our grandkids that we remember when there was no internet and no empanadas.  I'm sure that if the family empanada people have a good business head, they'll be able to ride this wave of competition, just like Bruno has. 

East Dulwich Forum

Established in 2006, we are an online community discussion forum for people who live, work in and visit SE22.

Home
Events
Sign In

Sign In



Or sign in with one of these services

Search
×
    Search In
×
×
  • Create New...