Potty training at night when toddler not really ready

[Pamela78]

Hi

My 3.5 year old has been potty trained for nearly a year during the day, but hasn't been showing signs of being ready to give up the pull-ups at night. He's always wet in the morning and has never woken to go to the toilet during the night.

A couple of weeks ago, he suddenly decided that he doesn't want to wear anything in bed - no pjs and no pull ups! Even if he goes to bed in them, he removes them almost immediately and I find a little pile of pjs/pullup by his bed.

We tried leaving him for over a week sleeping naked, with double waterproof sheets etc, and every night except one he wet the bed and woke up upset about it. So for the last few nights, we've tried lifting him when we go to bed with very limited success. Sometimes the very act of lifting him makes him wake up and wet the bed immediately and if we do manage to get him to the potty, he's generally really upset about being woken. I think we've only successfully lifted and had a dry bed in the morning once.

I don't think he's ready to give up the pull-ups and he's clearly not waking up before he needs to wee - but his complete refusal to wear anything is forcing us into this too soon for him.

Any tips / advice? I didn't really want to lift him as I'm not keen on him getting used to get up late at night at the same kind of time, but feel like that might be the only way to go at the moment until he can go through on his own - struggling to work out how to do that without him getting really upset!

[Saffron]

Oh dear, that does sound tough. Instead of lifting him for a late wee, could you put him to bed an hour later? That way, he would have a chance to do an extra wee himself before bed. Then once he's in a good routine of being dry over night, you could start to move the bedtime back to its normal time? xx

[EDmummy]

We stopped liquids 2 hours before bedtime and a sit on the loo at bedtime (whether they needed a wee or not). First son wet on and off for a couple of months, second son pretty much dry from the off. First son was adamant he was not going back into pull ups so we couldn't regress him however much of a pain it was to do so much washing but it really doesn't last that long in the grand scheme of things. All the very best.

[SBot]

My daughter will be 4 in June. We have tried the night time dryness 3 times. She is just not ready. We have lifted her at 11pm and she still wets the bed. I believe she is so heavily asleep it just doesn't wake her up. I she still wears a nappy to bed until she's 6, I really don't mind. It's not something that everyone will know about. She is keen though so we've told her if there is no wee in her nappy in the morning then she can stop wearing them.

Good luck!

[newtoedf]

sounds identical to my 3 year old - I resorted to bribery with Smarties to get him to wear a pull-up in bed again. He is very motivated by chocolate! It seems to have worked, one day we will have to deal with it again but right now, he is so clearly not ready that bribing him to wear a nappy seemed like the only option... One day I may also have to deal with his food issues, I know...

[Pamela78]

Thanks everyone! I think the bribery trick might work with my chocolate mad son!

[Oxalis]

My daughter did the same thing wrt not wanting to wear anything in bed. I put a nappy on after she was asleep until she was dry about five months later. Usually, around 11.30pm, there would be a thud as she removed the now wet nappy and hurled it across the room! She was dry for the rest of the night. Incidentally, over the course of about three weeks her nappy became dry all the time. Nothing else changed wrt fluid intake/toileting so I think she was just physiologically ready.

[Sol]

With a second child I did not worry with my oldest one leaving night nappies until she told me she didn't want them anymore when she was 5 and there was no accidents after she decided to do it.

I suggest you talk to him and tell him that if he does not want to wake up wet at night he should wear a nappy for bed; he should be old enough to understand and try again in 6 months or when you/he is ready.

[Peachpie]

We wake our 5 and a half year old every night around 9.30/10 and take him to the loo otherwise he wets the bed and he wakes again around 6.45 to go again. He simply is not able to hold on or wake himself up. My 3 year old will happily wait 12/13 hrs no probs!