Jump to content

Recommended Posts

bigbadwolf Wrote:

-------------------------------------------------------

> The foxes were f@cking each others brains out last

> night and I thought I had some air pellets left in

> the tin but I remember they belong to the pidgeons

> now.

>

> I always think I've got a cork screw for wine but

> I haven't.

>

> Condoms. Now that really is a bitch.


OK, BBW let's start from the top and number your problems from top to bottom 1, 2 and let's say 3.


1. Leap out and shout and scream at the foxes. Inform them that you're a wolf and you outrank them. They will leave.

2. Let all of the women in your life know that you, BBW have no corkscrew. Inform them all of 1 above.

3. The combination of 1 and 2 will ensure that 3 never becomes a matter you neeed concern yourself with again.


You're welcome.

HonaloochieB Wrote:

-------------------------------------------------------

> LuvPeckham Wrote:

> --------------------------------------------------

> -----

> > I actually used a Biscuit cutter to hold the

> eggs

> > with in the end.

>

> THE MOST ENORMOUS DOUBLE TAKE SINCE...Oh, sorry

> can't think. Can I leave it at Laurel & Hardy at

> their double-takiest?

>

> But I've just realised LP that you DON'T have an

> egg cup, but you DO have 'biscuit cutters'.

> It beggars belief that your kitchen priorities are

> so skewed, indeed warped.

> I can only assume you came off the worst in a

> break up with a patissier.

> If that was the case, LP I apologise, Je suis

> desolee.


Ahh now, as cooking is a passion of mine, then it is not surprising that I have biscuit cutters, Pastry brushes, Meat basters, state of the art gadgets but no microwant or egg cups (sadly I also have a bread maker that isn't used as I prefer to make it by hand) I even have such weird and wonderful things as pork pie tins,a cognac bottle full of olive oil and balsamic, millions of ramakins, little white pots for chocolate puds to go into (sorry strawbs, I have all the toys you want except the wire things for radiators as I don't have radiators) and a cake stand too.


Good theory about the patissier, but sadly that means breaking up with myself which I am not about to do in a hurry. (besides which one of me gets the cake stand...)



I have now realised that there is somehthing I thought I owned but don't .... my marbles !!!

LuvPeckham Wrote:

-------------------------------------------------------

> HonaloochieB Wrote:

> --------------------------------------------------

> -----

> > LuvPeckham Wrote:

> >

> --------------------------------------------------

>

> > -----

> > > I actually used a Biscuit cutter to hold the

> > eggs

> > > with in the end.

> >

> > THE MOST ENORMOUS DOUBLE TAKE SINCE...Oh, sorry

> > can't think. Can I leave it at Laurel & Hardy

> at

> > their double-takiest?

> >

> > But I've just realised LP that you DON'T have

> an

> > egg cup, but you DO have 'biscuit cutters'.

> > It beggars belief that your kitchen priorities

> are

> > so skewed, indeed warped.

> > I can only assume you came off the worst in a

> > break up with a patissier.

> > If that was the case, LP I apologise, Je suis

> > desolee.

>

> Ahh now, as cooking is a passion of mine, then it

> is not surprising that I have biscuit cutters,

> Pastry brushes, Meat basters, state of the art

> gadgets but no microwant or egg cups (sadly I also

> have a bread maker that isn't used as I prefer to

> make it by hand) I even have such weird and

> wonderful things as pork pie tins,a cognac bottle

> full of olive oil and balsamic, millions of

> ramakins, little white pots for chocolate puds to

> go into (sorry strawbs, I have all the toys you

> want except the wire things for radiators as I

> don't have radiators) and a cake stand too.

>

> Good theory about the patissier, but sadly that

> means breaking up with myself which I am not about

> to do in a hurry. (besides which one of me gets

> the cake stand...)

>

>

> I have now realised that there is somehthing I

> thought I owned but don't .... my marbles !!!


Ah, it now all makes sense LP, in fact I've just checked and there's not single Tree Top sguash bottle cap to be found in my cupboard.

Boy, is my face red(der).

The duck is alive and well, and lurking in the bathtub in the midst of a welter of jolly-coloured floaty plastic things, where it presumably bores all the other jolly-coloured floaty plastic things to death with the story of its adventure at PGC Mansions.

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now
  • Latest Discussions

    • Whilst I agree, I have been thinking about this recently in relation to some of the other posts on here about anti social behaviour. We are all products of our upbringing - our experiences at home, school and beyond - plus whatever we have inherited genetically which might affect our behaviour (the nature/nurture thing). So in this case, if people haven't been brought up to love and appreciate trees and other wild things, plus as you say they may be deeply unhappy (or have other undiagnosed issues) it's easy to see how they could have ended up doing this. Also, it's possible they had quite low intelligence and didn't really grasp what they were doing and the effect it would have on so many other people. But that's just surmise and possibly completely wrong. From what I've read about it, they seemed to be two mates egging each other on, like two big kids. I'm not for a minute excusing what they did, and it's right they should be punished, but I really hope they might get some sort of rehabilitation in prison (it would  be appropriate to have them do some kind of community service like planting saplings, wouldn't it, or working in woodland conservation). And the same goes for phone robbers and shoplifters (rehabilitation, not planting saplings), though for SOME  shoplifters there might also be other issues at play, not excluding poverty. Sorry Jasonlondon,  I've gone off at a real tangent here, lucky it's in the lounge! Oh oops I've just noticed it isn't. Sorry admin. Oh, and then there's a whole philosophical discussion to be had about free will and determinism ..... 🤣🤣🤣
    • Thanks! I'll find out in a few weeks when I get the results! It was one of those disconcerting things where a disembodied voice keeps booming  at you to breathe in and hold it, then breathe normally. Apart from that it was OK, all completely painless. I imagine there will be quite a few people going from ED, though I presume it covers the whole Southwark area 
    • Two men behind ‘senseless’ felling of Sycamore Gap tree jailed for more than four years Good to see these two jailed today for four years. There’s something deeply disturbing about people who destroy trees—any tree. Whether it’s a centuries-old landmark or a sapling in a quiet park, trees are living beings that offer beauty, shade, and life. The men who cut down the Sycamore Gap tree are a stark example of how far some people will go to lash out at something peaceful and meaningful. People who harm nature like this aren’t just destructive—they are often deeply unhappy. It takes a troubled mind to look at a tree and see something to ruin instead of something to protect. Read more here  
    • What a brilliant idea. I hope it went OK, Sue. 
Home
Events
Sign In

Sign In



Or sign in with one of these services

Search
×
    Search In
×
×
  • Create New...