Tiny Little Things That Cause You Irrational Rage

[RosieH]

People who pronounce it mischeevyus - there's no second i people

[northlondoner]

ruffers Wrote:

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> ITV's football commentators. All of them.

>

> Jim Beglin.

ITV

[louisiana]

The HMRC software that tells you to take 65p off your final employers payment for the year to HMRC... followed by the HMRC online end-of-year form that adds it back on and tells you you are now overdue for the payment of 65p!!

[nashoi]

People who press both buttons when calling a lift. Drives me mad every time, how long does it take to learn how to call a lift?

[sophiesofa]

RosieH Wrote:

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> People who pronounce it mischeevyus - there's no

> second i people

people who say toof instead of tooth because they think it makes them seem cute.

[katie1997]

On a train going through a long tunnel when the person sitting behind me, having a conversation on their mobile (of course), constantly asks the other person who is clearly no longer connected..

"are you still there?"

NO - THEY BLOODY WELL AREN'T YOU STUPID FUCKING TWAT

[ruffers]

People who go into a coffee shop and say "Can I get a coffee?" Course you can - it's a bleedin' coffee shop doofus.

People who pronounce H as 'haitch'.

[Brendan]

Correct. The only time it is acceptable to drop your H is when pronouncing H.

[randombloke]

* Could of instead of could have.

* Using incorrect reflexive pronouns, as in "I'll send it to yourself." I'll send it to YOU, you muppet. Beloved of Estate Agents and Pimps, I mean Recruitment Consultants.

* Apostrophe abuse.

* Seen or been instead of seeing or being.

* Labels stuck on the bottom of shoes.

* Shop assistants who manage to serve you without either speaking to you or looking at you.

* Anyone who isn't West Indian using backslang.

[GSJ57]

'Could of' drives me mad too!

[HonaloochieB]

randombloke Wrote:

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> * Could of instead of could have.

> * Using incorrect reflexive pronouns, as in "I'll

> send it to yourself." I'll send it to YOU, you

> muppet. Beloved of Estate Agents and Pimps, I

> mean Recruitment Consultants.

> * Apostrophe abuse.

> * Seen or been instead of seeing or being.

> * Labels stuck on the bottom of shoes.

> * Shop assistants who manage to serve you without

> either speaking to you or looking at you.

> * Anyone who isn't West Indian using backslang.

Could've in speech, which comes out as could of is perfectly fine, though in writing is abysmal. 'Could have' in speech is w*nkery almost beyond redemption.

I use the incorrect reflexive pronoun, to people that I like, in an informal sense, and I'm not a muppet.

Though there are worse epithets that could be applied to a person, c@nty-boll*cks, for example.

West Indian backslang?

Nap'aw?

[ruffers]

HonaloochieB Wrote:

------------------------

> Could've in speech, which comes out as could of is

> perfectly fine, though in writing is abysmal.

No no no. Actually deliberately saying "Could of" rather than in sounding like that in an accent is as bad as writing it, possibly worse. You could argue in some accents "could of" in writing is writing the sounds you hear, whereas saying the words "could of" is just plain wrong.

[ruffers]

Forget the ' no', I think I'm agreeing with you on reflection. Fiercely agreeing as a former colleague used to say.

[randombloke]

HonaloochieB Wrote:

>

> Could've in speech, which comes out as could of is

> perfectly fine, though in writing is abysmal.

> 'Could have' in speech is w*nkery almost beyond

> redemption.

> I use the incorrect reflexive pronoun, to people

> that I like, in an informal sense, and I'm not a

> muppet.

> Though there are worse epithets that could be

> applied to a person, c@nty-boll*cks, for example.

> West Indian backslang?

> Nap'aw?

Ah the joy that is an Internet forum...

Could of when written is an abomination. Could've when spoken is pretty much standard practice.

Lol @ c@nty boll*cks..."I've sent it to c@nty boll*cks"...sheer genius.

Of courfe the Englifh language is a movable feaft....thou art correct.

[HonaloochieB]

randombloke Wrote:

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> HonaloochieB Wrote:

> >

> > Could've in speech, which comes out as could of

> is

> > perfectly fine, though in writing is abysmal.

> > 'Could have' in speech is w*nkery almost beyond

> > redemption.

> > I use the incorrect reflexive pronoun, to

> people

> > that I like, in an informal sense, and I'm not

> a

> > muppet.

> > Though there are worse epithets that could be

> > applied to a person, c@nty-boll*cks, for

> example.

> > West Indian backslang?

> > Nap'aw?

>

> Ah the joy that is an Internet forum...

>

> Could of when written is an abomination. Could've

> when spoken is pretty much standard practice.

> Lol @ c@nty boll*cks..."I've sent it to c@nty

> boll*cks"...sheer genius.

>

> Of courfe the Englifh language is a movable

> feaft....thou art correct.

Cheers RB, you're a gent. Make you completely correct on the apostrophes, and it ain't a Truss thing as far as I'm concerned.

I used to read Keith Waterhouse's column in the Mirror (that's how long ago it was, it was still worth reading) back in 19 mumblety-mumble and he railed against punctuation abuse/misuse.

He formed the AAAA - the Association for the Abolition of Abberant Apostrophes.

Used to get a lively correspondence.

Maybe time for a revival?

[charliecharlie]

threads about bus routes.....

http://vancouver-pictures.com/d/412-2/No+Buses+Beyond+This+point+sign+at+Lynn+Canyon+Park+in+Vancouver.jpg

[cate]

The use of to instead of too which Honaloochie did today.

[HonaloochieB]

charliecharlie Wrote:

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> threads about bus routes.....

> http://vancouver-pictures.com/d/412-2/No+Buses+Bey

> ond+This+point+sign+at+Lynn+Canyon+Park+in+Vancouv

> er.jpg

Alright Charlies, I'll bite, not getting it.

Colour me dim.

[charliecharlie]

starting the day with a fine spring in your step

and ending it feeling like a deflated balloon...

http://www.businessweek.com/managing/economic_recovery/blog/archives/deflated_balloon.jpg

[sophiesofa]

Me, my boyfriend and his mate all booking today off work to lay the turf we ordered to arrive this morning then being told at 10.45 that it's not coming until tomorrow when it's due to rain! aaggghhhhh

[ruffers]

Get down a pub with a nice garden then while it's sunny!

[sophiesofa]

good plan - i just had to cook an emergency fry up but you're probably right alcohol and the outdoors is needed too.

[omniprescient]

..people who use "effect" when they mean "affect" and vice-versa - the effect of which enrages me and affects my mental composure

...peole who use "it's " when it's ovbious that in so doing its meaning is affected

...people who use "advice" instead of "advise" - I advise then to take advice on this

people who use "license" (bare infintive of "to license") instead of "licence" (noun)

people who misuse the present subjunctive - I wish I "were" licensed to lend them advice so as to make its use less prevalent and so as to effect an improvement in the use of English grammar.

&c. &c.

[silverfox]

...people who use "license" (bare infintive of "to license") instead of "licence" (noun)

The general rule s when verb, c when noun does not apply in American English so it's not strictly incorrect to use s in both cases as long as it's used consistently.

What does &c mean? Surely not etc?

[ruffers]

omniprescient - are all the mistakes in your post acceptable then? Just checking.. ;-)