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On a train going through a long tunnel when the person sitting behind me, having a conversation on their mobile (of course), constantly asks the other person who is clearly no longer connected..


"are you still there?"


NO - THEY BLOODY WELL AREN'T YOU STUPID FUCKING TWAT

* Could of instead of could have.

* Using incorrect reflexive pronouns, as in "I'll send it to yourself." I'll send it to YOU, you muppet. Beloved of Estate Agents and Pimps, I mean Recruitment Consultants.

* Apostrophe abuse.

* Seen or been instead of seeing or being.

* Labels stuck on the bottom of shoes.

* Shop assistants who manage to serve you without either speaking to you or looking at you.

* Anyone who isn't West Indian using backslang.

randombloke Wrote:

-------------------------------------------------------

> * Could of instead of could have.

> * Using incorrect reflexive pronouns, as in "I'll

> send it to yourself." I'll send it to YOU, you

> muppet. Beloved of Estate Agents and Pimps, I

> mean Recruitment Consultants.

> * Apostrophe abuse.

> * Seen or been instead of seeing or being.

> * Labels stuck on the bottom of shoes.

> * Shop assistants who manage to serve you without

> either speaking to you or looking at you.

> * Anyone who isn't West Indian using backslang.


Could've in speech, which comes out as could of is perfectly fine, though in writing is abysmal. 'Could have' in speech is w*nkery almost beyond redemption.

I use the incorrect reflexive pronoun, to people that I like, in an informal sense, and I'm not a muppet.

Though there are worse epithets that could be applied to a person, c@nty-boll*cks, for example.

West Indian backslang?

Nap'aw?

HonaloochieB Wrote:

------------------------

> Could've in speech, which comes out as could of is

> perfectly fine, though in writing is abysmal.


No no no. Actually deliberately saying "Could of" rather than in sounding like that in an accent is as bad as writing it, possibly worse. You could argue in some accents "could of" in writing is writing the sounds you hear, whereas saying the words "could of" is just plain wrong.

HonaloochieB Wrote:

>

> Could've in speech, which comes out as could of is

> perfectly fine, though in writing is abysmal.

> 'Could have' in speech is w*nkery almost beyond

> redemption.

> I use the incorrect reflexive pronoun, to people

> that I like, in an informal sense, and I'm not a

> muppet.

> Though there are worse epithets that could be

> applied to a person, c@nty-boll*cks, for example.

> West Indian backslang?

> Nap'aw?


Ah the joy that is an Internet forum...


Could of when written is an abomination. Could've when spoken is pretty much standard practice.

Lol @ c@nty boll*cks..."I've sent it to c@nty boll*cks"...sheer genius.


Of courfe the Englifh language is a movable feaft....thou art correct.

randombloke Wrote:

-------------------------------------------------------

> HonaloochieB Wrote:

> >

> > Could've in speech, which comes out as could of

> is

> > perfectly fine, though in writing is abysmal.

> > 'Could have' in speech is w*nkery almost beyond

> > redemption.

> > I use the incorrect reflexive pronoun, to

> people

> > that I like, in an informal sense, and I'm not

> a

> > muppet.

> > Though there are worse epithets that could be

> > applied to a person, c@nty-boll*cks, for

> example.

> > West Indian backslang?

> > Nap'aw?

>

> Ah the joy that is an Internet forum...

>

> Could of when written is an abomination. Could've

> when spoken is pretty much standard practice.

> Lol @ c@nty boll*cks..."I've sent it to c@nty

> boll*cks"...sheer genius.

>

> Of courfe the Englifh language is a movable

> feaft....thou art correct.


Cheers RB, you're a gent. Make you completely correct on the apostrophes, and it ain't a Truss thing as far as I'm concerned.

I used to read Keith Waterhouse's column in the Mirror (that's how long ago it was, it was still worth reading) back in 19 mumblety-mumble and he railed against punctuation abuse/misuse.

He formed the AAAA - the Association for the Abolition of Abberant Apostrophes.

Used to get a lively correspondence.

Maybe time for a revival?

charliecharlie Wrote:

-------------------------------------------------------

> threads about bus routes.....

> http://vancouver-pictures.com/d/412-2/No+Buses+Bey

> ond+This+point+sign+at+Lynn+Canyon+Park+in+Vancouv

> er.jpg


Alright Charlies, I'll bite, not getting it.

Colour me dim.

..people who use "effect" when they mean "affect" and vice-versa - the effect of which enrages me and affects my mental composure


...peole who use "it's " when it's ovbious that in so doing its meaning is affected


...people who use "advice" instead of "advise" - I advise then to take advice on this


people who use "license" (bare infintive of "to license") instead of "licence" (noun)


people who misuse the present subjunctive - I wish I "were" licensed to lend them advice so as to make its use less prevalent and so as to effect an improvement in the use of English grammar.


&c. &c.

...people who use "license" (bare infintive of "to license") instead of "licence" (noun)


The general rule s when verb, c when noun does not apply in American English so it's not strictly incorrect to use s in both cases as long as it's used consistently.


What does &c mean? Surely not etc?

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