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I'd just like to pick the brains of some of the professionals who read this forum if I may.


A few ago it was repoted that campaigners in New Zealand were trying to get equal rights for primates to humans on the basis they shared over 99% of their DNA with us. Various experts were wheeled into british newsrooms to poo poo this idea. One of them did so with the argument that we share 50% of our DNA with broccoli. This set me to thinking, could it be possible that eventually broccoli may have the same rights as a witness in a New Zealand court as a woman does in a sharia court today.


So, do any of the barristers, who I know read this forum, have any experiance with broccoli, are women really as reliable? Persoally I've always found broccoli to be exemplary in its behaviour. I can't recall a single occasion when it's lied to me or let me down, even when past its best before date. I couldn't say the same thing about some of the women I've known.


Another expert used bananas as his example, again the 50% figure was used. So presumably the average man is worth two bananas. My question to the medical practioners is, if a chap is not quite the full two bananas is there treatment available on the NHS for this. Sorry, herbalists need not reply as I do not believe in pseudo-science.

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nashoi Wrote:

-------------------------------------------------------

> So presumably the average

> man is worth two bananas. My question to the

> medical practioners is, if a chap is not quite the

> full two bananas is there treatment available on

> the NHS for this. Sorry, herbalists need not reply

> as I do not believe in pseudo-science.



2 bananas? Gross over-estimation, I think ;) Treatment on the NHS was discontinued a few years back, there was too much demand and the system couldn't cope.

My research has shown that many men claim that they are bananas but in fact are much more likely to be found to be runner beans.


I trust this will be useful to you.


P.S. If I eat a lot of broccoli, does this make me less human?



Halfway to cannibalism actually, but as a lover of the legume forgiven

As it happens, under British law primates do have rights that eschew those of more run of the mill mammals.


Principally regarding testing.


I'm concerned that Moos' testing may have involved a serious breach of these conditions in the name of 'research'. The Japanese, of course, 'research' whales.

Huguenot Wrote:

-------------------------------------------------------

> As it happens, under British law primates do have

> rights that eschew those of more run of the mill

> mammals.

>

> Principally regarding testing.

>

> I'm concerned that Moos' testing may have involved

> a serious breach of these conditions in the name

> of 'research'. The Japanese, of course, 'research'

> whales.


I am surprised at you, sir. I would have thought it hardly necessary to assure you that all of my research was carried out upon unpaid volunteers in none of whose vocabulary was contained the word 'ook'.

HAL9000 Wrote:

-------------------------------------------------------

> EDF IQ Test

>

> Is Broccoli -

>

> A: a cross between a cauliflower and a barrister?

> B: a naturally occurring brassica?

> C: a producer of James Bond films?

>


A - Jesus was hung on a cross between two thieves, it's quite possible one was a barrister. I don't think cauliflower had been invented at the time.

B - I think you'll find the word is 'brassiere' and they featured heavily in the James Bond films. Apparently he could open one one=handed and flick it atop the shower rail in under ten seconds.

C - See B.

"Apparently he could open one one=handed and flick it atop the shower rail in under ten seconds."


James Bond, clearly a man worth the full 2 bananas and possibly a pear as well. I'm surprised Fleming never got around to pointing this out given all the other cobblers he came up with.

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