The best way to go about murdering someone

[bigbadwolf]

I had a conversation with a serving member of the Kent Fire Brigade this afternoon and he reliably informed me that if you wanted to off someone then the best way to do it without drawing suspicion to yourself is to go to their place and get them pissed. Wait until they've passed out through excessive alcohol consumption and then stage a chip-pan fire.

The investigating authorities will naturally conclude that the victim got trashed and fancied a bite to eat but unfortunatly passed out before the snack became volatile and burnt them and their belongings to a crisp.

Jobsagoodun.

[Santerme]

Unbelievable!

[mockney piers]

Good to see you using your refound thread starting powers so well.

To stay on topic, give a man enough rope....

[????]

Chips and Vodka at your gaff then BBW?

[SeanMacGabhann]

WTF?

* shakes head *

some people just ask for it

[Keef]

Oh come on, this thread isn't too bad, I've had this conversation in the pub before, after a few beers.

I once met a bloke who told me (when quite drunk), that he wanted to be a hit man, and had the idea of burying his victims up to their waist, then running over them with a steamroller.

I suspect he'll never do it, it was just one of those random conversations you have in the pub.

[silverfox]

Seems a bit too labour intensive to me - what with peeling all those spuds etc and what if the frazzled victim had McCain oven bake chips in the freezer?

Nah, bigbadwolf, sounds like 'pub talk' to me after a good session in the Capitol

Far better to treat them to a slap up meal at Heston Blumenthal's The Fat Duck with oysters as a starter.

[Jeremy]

Ah, but silverfox... you can get frozen chips which are ready to deep-fry. And (I imagine) they react in a particularly volatile fashion when they initially hit the oil. That would be the way to go.

The problem would be making sure nobody finds out you'd been round their house.