Normal People

[HonaloochieB]

Sue Wrote:

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> Christ, who wants to be normal??

>

> :-S

Well I do, and I don't think I'm alone in that.

[HonaloochieB]

I mean so did Ian Dury.

I wanna be straight, I wanna be straight

I'm sick and tired of taking drugs and staying up late

I wanna confirm, I wanna conform

I wanna be safe and I wanna be snug and I wanna be warm

I want to be straight, I want to be straight

I wanna create a place of my own in the welfare state

Brr, gonna be good, brr, gonna be kind

It might be a wrench but think of the stench I'm leaving behind

I wanna be straight, I wanna be straight

Come out of the cold and do what I'm told and don't deviate

I wanna give, I wanna give, I wanna give my consent

I'm learning to hate all the things that were great when I used to be bent!

Could be not straightness

Dum dum dilley

Might lead to greatness

Dur yuh dum der

Owing to lateness

My chance has only just arrived, ha

Ow! Straight, straight, straight, straight

Straight, straight, straight, straight

Straight, straight, straight, straight, straight

I wanna be straight, I wanna be straight

I'm sick and tired of taking drugs and staying up late

I know that you're right, I know I was wrong

So thanks very much, please keep in touch, I'll be rhyming along

I wanna be straight

I wanna be straight

I wanna be straight

I wanna be straight (straight, straight)

I wanna be straight (straighter would be great)

I mean you can't say fairer than that. WELL CAN YOU?

[Brendan]

Ba-ba-bamp-ba ba-ba-ba-bamp-ba I wanna be sedated

[Brendan]

Or indeed if you are Fat Mike of NoFx fame,

I wanna be an alcoholic

I wanna be co-drug dependant

Wanna be sedated most of the time

I wanna sing,

I wanna dance

I wanna pass out and wet my pants

I wanna be an alcoholic man!

[Nero]

Normal is a cycle on the (Smeg, candy-coloured, A+ rated) washing machine.

[HonaloochieB]

Hyuck, Nero said smeg.

[HonaloochieB]

.

[HonaloochieB]

HonaloochieB Wrote:

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[jumpinjackflash]

SMEG make washing machines now?

[Brendan]

Come on Loochie I waiting to see what you were going to do with singe, cringe, hinge, tinge, fringe, minge, dinge and syringe.

[Brendan]

Oh wait, wrong thread.

[annaj]

Oh, is this like a personality test? If you were a washing machine cycle, which cycle would you be?

I feel like a handwash today - short, cold, low energy and disappointing results.

[Moos]

Ha, good one.

I'm like a quick spin cycle. Lots of noise and rushing about, but still a bit wet at the end of the day.

[HonaloochieB]

I'm like a service wash, I pay a woman to rummage through my underwear and leave feeling cleaner but slightly guilty.