PetuniaButtons

Oh, dear! that poor, poor boy Me and Lawrence had a look at it and the cheeky scamp told me "Mother, if you ever get like that it's the workhouse for you, dear"

Our chums over on the Nunhead forum are getting all excited about this. (I can tell they're excited. you know, there are three whole posts on the thread!) It's a programme by Americans in Nunhead, for other Americans in Nunhead, for non- Americans in Nunhead, and even possibly of interest to non Americans not living in Nunhead. It's on Resonance 104.4 at half past ten of a Monday evening. Now this programme has been what you might call an Education to me and my Lawrence (not, unfortunately, to Mr Buttons. He doesn't trust the radio since Lord Haw Haw and will only make an exception to listen to The Organist Entertains on Radio 2, and sometimes I do catch him having a sneaky listen to the Craig Charles funk and soul show over on radio 6 digicle.) Anyways myself and Lawrence, if we ever saw an American in Nunhead before we heard this show, well, we'd shove them straight on the 78 and tell them "Tower Hill's thataway, pardner!". Well, now we know, some of them actually live here, would you believe! Real ones! And if anyone doesn't listen to Resonance, well, I can heartily recommend it. At first I only listened to my pals on Calling All Pensioners, but now I listen to lots. Some of it is a bit avon guard for my tastes- you know, whole programmes that sound like a mobile phone ringing you from someone's trouser pocket. Dear me, I can't get on with that. I'm in me 70s! But some of the rest is smashing, specially the Make Your Own D--n Music Show with Bob and Roberta Smith. He's really good, but she's a bit quiet. Probably can't get a word in edgeways, poor love! (Mr Buttons is looking over me shoulder to check me spellins. he says he knows how she feels- the sauce!) ttfn!

Hello dear- well, aren't you a lovely lady! Paris for your other half's birthday- what a lovely idea! I haven't got anything as good as that up my sleeve. Mind you, Mr Buttons did take me up the Oxo Tower for my 60th- I can't say too much about it, but it was certainly a surprise! I have said it before and I'll say it again- you can't go wrong with a voucher. Or I think they have them little plastic cards these days. You can even get them for Sainsbury's -he could maybe get himself a tin of nice biscuits and then he might do the weekly shop, if you drop a couple of hints! Anyway dear I've got to dash. I'm off to get ready for the Pyrotechnic's Arms. Course it's meat raffle night so we need to get there early to get a comfy seat... ttfn!

Hello dear- well, aren't you a lovely lady! Paris for your other half's birthday- what a lovely idea! I haven't got anything as good as that up my sleeve. Mind you, Mr Buttons did take me up the Oxo Tower for my 60th- I can't say too much about it, but it was certainly a surprise! I have said it before and I'll say it again- you can't go wrong with a voucher. Or I think they have them little plastic cards these days. You can even get them for Sainsbury's -he could maybe get himself a tin of nice biscuits and then he might do the weekly shop, if you drop a couple of hints! Anyway dear I've got to dash. I'm off to get ready for the Pyrotechnic's Arms. Course it's meat raffle night so we need to get there early to get a comfy seat... ttfn!

Ooh, has he gone, then? that little woolfy chap? I thought I hadn't seen him about and I thought he must have got himself a nice lady friend! What did he do? He was always a treasure to me. Such a nice polite boy. If you see him around do tell him if he gets a bit lonely me and my friends will always have a cup of tea and a macaroon for him over on moneysavingexpert.com It's not all money saving, you know! and we're always looking for new blood, as it were. I think he'll liven things up a bit, bless him! (I can't say much about the other fella. As the Buttons always say- if youu can't say anything nice, don't say anything at all!) Anyway must be off to listen to my friends on Calling All Pensioners on resonance. ttfn!

ooh, sorry I missed you earlier, girls- I've been busy with my rissoles No, dear, Laurence is far too young for Miss Streisand. He prefers what I believe is called "nosebleed techno" dear me, what a racket! Mr Buttons says reminds him of the ack ack guns in Vicky Park... and as for your kind offers, Daizie and emc, you both sound delightful young ladies and I shall let Laurence know the minute he gets back- would you believe, he's just popped out with the dog again! Poor Snoopy won't have any legs left at this rate!

I heard that egg boxes make for good sound insulations and will be a focal point in your lounge. A trombone is a nice mellifluous yet manly instrument.

My Laurence is a batchelor, in case any of you young ladies are interested! I says to him last night, I says, while we do love you living here, Laurence, I can't be hoovering round your feet for another forty two years, it's time you found yourself a lady friend. Me and Mr Buttons won't be around forever, you know! (it's true, though, my knees ain't what they was, and Mr B has his chest, so we wouldn't say no to the Sheltered. they have the Singing Postman on Wednesdays!..but I don't like to tell Laurence, it'd only upset him.) Anyways, he just gives me that little smile he does, then he offers to take Snoopy out. you know, it was half eleven. Freezing! They didn't get in till half five this morning when Mr Buttons was poaching his eggs!

Oh, dear, Mr Wolf! Bet you feel like cinderella, you poor love, what with all your friends out... Never mind, if your machine arrives in time remember that the Man of Kent does afters on Friday. Just knock on the window three times and say you're a Buttons, they'll let you in no messin (there's about 50 of us round these parts so no-one can keep track!) You might have to knock loud, though, cos it's Ramblin Pete night and the volume knob sometimes slips a bit!

Hello? Hell-oo-oo! .....coooooo-eeeee! Blimey, it's gone a bit quiet round ere! where've them young people all got to?

Ooh, you are a one, Mr Wolf! There's always bingo - you just need to know where to look (I could tell you, but then I'd have to kill you!)

Mrs Brady Old Lady. I actually know Ada. She lives over Sydenham. We still sometimes go the Bingo in Forest Hill. She's never been the same since her Sidney died, though, bless her.

Oh, dear, you are a lot of funny folk on here!! Whenever I do me little bits of writing on here- I like to think of it as doing a sort of free postcard, if you like- you youngsters always come on and start saying I'm someone else, especially Ted and Max! Well, if you could only see us now, me and Mr B are sitting here with the tears rolling down our faces!! As if someone would come on here and pretend to be a lady of a certain age, happily married and living in Nunhead!I mean, it's a nice life and all, but it's hardly Harrold Robbins now, is it? I'm a bit puzzled by it, to tell you the truth, cos I never get this on moneysavingexpert. Or on the Grans bit of that Mums Net (mind you I don't go on there too often. I'm telling you, some of the language those "ladies" use would make a whore blush!) Anyway, I'm off to me sister in law's at the sheltered for lotto night. To tell you the truth, the lotto ain't all that, but we call it "lucky dip" night. While the warden's got her back turned, going round collecting up the big pens and the cards, we all put our unwanted medications in the lotto bag, give em a shake to mix em up nice and then pick one out each. You should try it, it's ever such fun! You never know what you're going to end up with! Anyway nighty night all...and remember-if you like it, try it-if you don't like it, try it- you might like it!

Oooh, mr Wolf, you are a one! Julie Andrews oh dear me no. Mind you people did used to say I had a look of a young Merle Oberon about me... Anyway I can't be sitting here all evening gassing to you, dear. Mr Button's chops won't cook themselves!

ooh, couldn't resist!I know it's a bit of an oldie, but it's certainly a goodie! Mr Buttons has had to go up the loft today to find my nice warm woolly with the pictures of the dogs on it.It's a bit mothbally tho but I'll put it through on a hot wash with extra Surf, no harm done!

Ooh triffic Mr Wolf, me and Laurence have just cut a rug to that, and Mr Buttons has been doing his beatboxing. That's got our Friday night off to a flying start. Now we'll just have another quick horse's neck before we go down the Man of Kent for Ramblin Pete. Nighty night all..don't do anythin I wouldn't do!

Budgerigars

Mr Pounds is right, dear, you leave the plastic on it'll last you years. And make sure you get a three piece, you can't go wrong with a three piece. Down Bromley they'll throw you in a nice nest of tables as well.

Oooh, no, Mr Max, the pampas grass went a long time ago cos her Frank thought it was a bit old fashioned. They got some nice hard standing out there instead for the caravan. Very nice it is too.

Myself and Mr Buttons are not on the face books whatsit but we do have a marvellous collection of scrap books. Mine go back to VJ day. As a matter of fact I have just been pasting in some interestin souvenirs from last week at my sister's in Leigh on Sea.

Over here in Nunhead Mr Buttons is having a little jig to Perry Como's Hot Diggity Dog while I try and do round his feet with the carpet sweeper (he says I can't use the vacuum because it's too noisy)

Ooh, I think I know who that wouldve been! It's probably my boy Laurence (well, I say boy, he's 42)...he's a good boy. He don't live down Landells though, he lives here with me and Mr Buttons. He wouldn't want to leave his old mum, now would he? Anyway what he likes to do is he likes sometimes to take a little stroll late at night. Well, I say stroll, sometimes he's gone hours, he don't come in till I'm gettin up sometimes. I tell you what though it always does him the power of good, his little perambulations, he always comes back with a bit of colour in his cheeks, love him. As for the suitcase, that ain't a suitcase, it's me Sholley. You see I says to him if you're going out and about late at night you should take Snoopy out with you, cos it ain't fair him stuck indoors while you're out in the fresh air, and he did make a bit of a fuss, but we come to an arrangement about it. Trouble is Snoopy's not getting any younger and his hips- well they ain't what they were and so he can't go too far till his back left leg starts to splay. Then Laurence has to put him in the Sholley and wheel him home. Well I'm glad to have helped clear that up. It's always nice to be of service to the community, as Mr Buttons always says.

Ooh, we didn't buy anything in there!John Lewis?oh dear me no! As I said, it was a birthday treat. Meself and Mary just have a little sit down on the patio sets and have a quick crab paste sandwich. Then back down them lovely new exalators and off home in time to get Mr B's tea on. All in all, a lovely day out, and the weather was kind to us.

I'm just astonished that all you people see fit to ruin a perfectly good bit of wallpaper by sloshing emulsion all over it. *tut*

...mind you I did have a peek round the door of that there Quiet Room. Blimey! Think that could do with a proper Deep Clean. By the sounds of it there's plenty of you round here with a bit of time on your hands. you could busy yourselves with that instead of wasting time on ere all day *tsk*