SummerMum

I would like recommendations for a plumber who is capable of taking a look at my central heating linked underfloor heating, as well as change a washer, sort out a couple of issues with toilets and basins. Thanks

Agree with HK as a destination, although in Jan and Feb it is pretty grim weather wise - plus side means not boiling hot and high humidity, but you would need winter clothes (10 degrees with no central heating, so it feels colder than it sounds). However, the rain fall is lower that time of year, and you'll have summer awaiting you in Aus, so you're not going for the sun anyway to HK. Plenty to do for a trip - Ocean Park, Disneyland, the beaches (although wrapped up but they're all sandy), chilled out days on any of the islands (all a very cheap boat ride away). Plus sides - very safe, so no issues at all with crime. Avoid staying in Kowloon as IMO it is hell on toast as just so busy. There is a family-easy hotel at Discovery Bay, which could be a nice base, and a boat trip from Central, or if you don't want to stay in Central, then there is also a hotel in Stanley (beach town) on the south side of the island. Equally, though Singapore would be fun!

Is there anyone who works with Fridge Freezers - have a 7year old Whirlpool Fridge Freezer and don't want to use the water dispenser until it has had an overhaul or been replaced. Or does that mean it's time to buy a new fridge?

I'm looking for recommendations for a gardener who can do a bit of an initial overhaul to my garden, and then also maintain after. Needs to be someone who is qualified at gardening! Thanks!

Think this is a really spot on thread - and something I recognise. However, I promise when they get a bit older, they can crack you up - watching my 6-year old daughter this morning in a padded spider mans outfit and a pair of high heeled shoes. My 4-year old asking if a pirate ship is used to transport goods overseas. Them saying 'Good morning Darling' to me at the start of the day. There are moments of hilarity every day, which are essential along with the other moments of drudge and poo. Edited to add... your sense of humour changes - I remember cracking up at various comedy clubs pre-children, and I just don't think I would find it so funny any more. However, I do remember, after first child was born, a Ben Elton comedy 'Blessed' was on the beeb, Ardal O'Hanlan and Mel Geidroyc as a couple with a baby and toddler, and I felt like someone got it, and it was funny because it was exactly how I felt. The same for 'outnumbered' now - which pre-kids I would have thought was probably pointless telly! Now, I think they may well be bugging our house for ideas!

If you have a straightforward set up - ie, no previous marriages/one property etc etc, then there is a will kit you can get - from WHSmiths, and probably other places. This works well for uncomplicated 'estates'. It explains all the legal jargon, advice on guardians etc etc.

Hi, sympathies indeed - I had this with only one of my three pregnancies - it was intensely painful. I saw an osteopath above Soup Dragon (this was some years ago, so not sure if she is still there). This did help for a while after. I do remember do not cross your legs, do not sit cross-legged, do not do anything other than keep everything in a straight line. I can't remember how this worked with sleep though, as if you want to sleep on your side, later on, then can't remember if that made it worse or not. I think walking pushing a buggy would help, as it is like a walking frame! I remember being told even something like stepping off the pavement on to the road can be a trigger. So, not easy for trying to deal with a toddler at all. I do hope you get the help you need, as it can be so painful, but mine went as soon as the baby was born, and I didn't get it again with subsequent pregnancies. All the best.

You need to find out directly from the nursery, as not all our now able to claim this. Hope you get the answer you want!

I've been a full time Mum since 2005, when my first child was born. We have three, ages 6,4 ad 3. For the first year at least it felt like a wonderful gift to be able to have the choice not to work and be at home. I have to remind myself now that being at home means that we have been able to live overseas for my husbands work, and not to have to keep on taking maternity leave having three children in a quick hurry! Now they are all a little older, I am aware of the sacrifice I have made - I couldn't realistically go back to my old job, and during arguments about this, when I've talked about feeling frustrated at being at home, DH has told me I could only get a job in supermarket (OK it was during a row, I'm sure he wouldn't say that to me over a candle lit supper, and sorry to suggest that a supermarket job is the lowest of the low. He said it for the drama)... where I remind him I have a degree and post-grad qualifications. Anyway, I look forward to the day soon when I will start looking in to career move next, which I think will probably involve working in a school setting, to allow for me to still be with the kids. I don't regret making the choice to be at home. I did the make the decision for my children, but I also can't throw it back at them when they're teenagers ('I GAVE UP MY CAREER FOR YOU!!!'), because really I did it for me. I would make the same choice again. But it is boring, lonely, unglamorous, thankless. Me and the kids have loads of friends locally, we've always been busy on the playgroup, school circuit etc, but it is lonely, as no matter what at some point you're on your own with children, who you love, but who are children, and not adults. In fact, what I would change (if I was to have my time again...!) is that rather than take on a career in the city, working long hours and a large amount of travel, I would train as a teacher. Which is the last thing I wanted to do when at school! I went to an academic girls school, and we did not talk about how to combine motherhood with a career, we talked about the world being open to us, and going for our goals. I wonder what conversations I will have with my daughter about this... Anyway, lunch time thought there. Back to the little one now!

Thanks so much - really great suggestions here from everyone - now no excuse not to get online hunting!!

Can anyone recommend good fitness DVDs - one that is possible to follow, and not assuming super-human levels of fitness? (eeek summer time - t-shirts, summer dresses, swimming costumes... nowhere to hide!)

I think some kids love the high-uppyness of high chairs, and even the feeling of being a bit snug - one of mine did, and would sit in it for ages watching me cook etc. However, my youngest has never 'done' highchairs. We have a small table with mini adult type chairs that he would sit on, or would otherwise prefer to sit on an adults lap and eat his meal at the big table. Or a picnic on the floor... just never a highchair!

Yes there is - it is on tooting high street. But I cannot remember the name. I phoned Maclaren and they told me my nearest place. The place was v good.

We did Avignon Eurostar last year also, and loved it (with 5, 3 and 2 year old). OK , loved it may be a bit strong, but you get the idea. I didn't scream or cry once. We did the drive when number one was five months old. Bit of a mare - we'd set satnav to avoid motorways for some reason (blamed on me, mais oui) so took about 3/4 of the day before we clocked on that we were driving through one very pretty town after another. Yes, it was great to be able to load up car with everything, but train was so much easier - apart from that terrible queue at Avignon station for the hire car, and then, now obligatory row about getting hire car seats to work, which middle child refused to sit in car seat that wasn't 'his' and we drove to our destination with him in his footwell, which he remembers fondly to this day... OK, on thread about the drive - lots of snacks, change of clothes, bottles of water, wet wipes, face spray... marriage guidance manual. It will be fun really!

I find it all quite amusing... as no matter what my boys will still go around fighting each other, 'killing' each other, and turning hair brushes in to guns to fire each other... And my daughter will sing 'hairspray'! Penguin I think do all the classics, in the original version. I actually forgot how gruesome some of these are, but the kids always seem fine whatever version they read. I taught my eldest the 'playground' version of a song she came home singing the other day... felt like a naughty school girl myself! candj - I think I know the play you were at! I think all the parents find it rather amusant!

We also swore by Infacol - maybe it did nothing, but it made me feel like I was doing something! Sounds like typical colic - a very small word for a very exhausting time!

Nearly three years on from the last time I had mastitis and still this thread makes me come out in goose bumps. Uptime - my experience is very clear pain, so much so that one time I couldn't move my arm either. Then all the associated shivers, shakes, body aches (oh the memory). Of course, if in doubt you should always see your GP. Sophie - I hope you've seen gp and got whatever you need. Lots of warm showers, yes that comb trick, feeding with chin pointing. You may be given antibiotics. Once in NYC I was even sent off to a 'breast doctor' with mastitis, which was a great way to get a good check, and very sobering to realise that my problem, although very very painful, would pass. And of course sleep, and relaxation. What's that? Feel better, SummerMum

A good piece of advice I got was so common sense, but I needed to hear - 'you just have to let your standards drop', and for me that meant parenting standards as well as domestic one! 1) Meal times - it is the witching hour. For a long time it was the worst bit of my day, and I had to remind myself I wasn't alone, within a mile radius of me there would be many other Mums feeling the same way. Find out what works - baby may like being in the bouncy chair and watching dinner time (you never know!) or use the sling... 2) Crying, night times weren't a problem, but early morning was - if I was up with baby any time from 5am, the older one would wake. 4) Lack of sleep - just sleep whenever you can. In waiting rooms, in the car (not when you're driving). Coffee coffee coffee 5) If Grandma will take him for jab then go for it. Phone clinic to check with them, just in case, but good old Granny! 6) Yes - you will, I went on to have a third, after thinking that two was enough. It won't last forever that exhaustion. Be honest with friends and family about how tired you are, fed up you feel. I remember the first day my husband went back to work after baby two arrived, and very soon I was faced with two children crying , at me, at the same time.I had never experienced that before, and I could please neither of them. Very quickly you adjust to the change, the mess, the noise level, but it did take some adjustment. And you will still get those precious moments in the middle of the night when you can look at both of them sleeping, and it will all seem so worthwhile. Hope this helps - it is meant to!!

I agree - time to throw them out. Best practice(as if) would be to always empty toys of water after the bath. I also keep them in a basket which sits next to the radiator, on a heated floor, which I tell myself helps to get rid of excess water. But when it happens, and if I can tell which one it comes out of, I will usually also send them to the big bath in the sky (like that Pickle!)

Sounds familiar! I know Sitters do provide emergency cover. Take a look on their site, as you have to pay a registration and membership fee. I would say it is only worth it if you use them for babysitting as well, otherwise you're paying just in case of an emergency!

I understand that there may be some link to having had the chicken pox immunisation and a greater chance of getting shingles in adulthood. I read this in an interview with the very clever chap who created the immunisation, however, my personal experience is... first two children were either born or lived in US, where it is almost impossible to avoid the immunisation, so we did what we were advised and had them immunised. No problems. Our third child was born and has always lived here in London. He got chicken pox at around two years. I was so chilled out about it. He was pretty ill with it, although no more than I think is normal with a 'bad case', however, as a result of the fever he had a febrile convulsion, which was (although completely 'normal' I know!) completely terrifying, while it was happening we felt completely unable do anything, wonderful paramedics and a long day spent in A&E. I don't know if I would have done it any differently, but I guess my story would be that although our little one recovered as would be expected from chicken pox/febrile convulsion, just but to watch the fever if they get it, and to use calpol etc to keep it under control! I think I was probably just too relaxed about 'it's just chicken pox!'

Take a look on the au pair world website, as under their FAQ section they have either the current regs, or a link to them, regarding pay, hours and why you don't have to pay tax on it. (for au pairs)

I think it is more of what is considered 'normal' in our culture. We have three children, and the worst will have been when there have been nights with all three in our super kingsize bed, and then one decides it is time to wake up, or play footsie with a sibling, or poke Mummy's nose and eyes, and then what started as a way of actually getting some sleep turns in to a very early morning whispered argument about whose fault it is all the kids are in our bed in the first place. From reading what you have to say, Lochie, it sounds like right now, your co-sleeping is just a sensible solution. What is around the corner... who knows. If you can stick to getting the little one back in their own bed in April, then good for you... you have managed more than me! (but honestly, there are times when they are in our bed, when they are all asleep, or one or two of them are asleep, and it just feels like bliss! Then there are times, few and far between, when we wake in the morning and no one has climbed in during the night, and that feels like we are a parenting success story!) And it is on my to do list to sort it out, I think I was going to do it over Christmas...

St Saviours, on the corner of Herne Hill Road and Finsen Road, Herne Hill. The church has a very busy childrens church, with a creche for little ones, to age-based groups for children aged about 2.5years onward. There is also a Church of England primary school. There is always someone greeting people outside, and after the service the children play in the school playground, (after a quick biscuit and glass of juice.) If you want to pm me if you want to make an arrangement for tomorrow or the week after. Hope you find somewhere good for you all!

Hi, I don't know of any London private mws to rec, however, two of my children were born in London, and the after midwifery care was good. With my first child, we had the midwife pretty much every day for at least two weeks (they just seemed to know I wasn't quite ready to not have the security of knowing someone in the know would come each day), and also, they will only stop coming when your baby has reached a gd weight etc. Also, a health visitor will visit you, at some point in the first few days. I believe MWs have to oome for ten days, although that may not be every day. This may have now changed. And again for breastfeeding, there is a lot of support out there. From breastfeeding cafes, to drop ins, to someone, a bf counsellor, who came to my house with no charge. I would suggest you ask your own mws, your gp, and of course, on here, as to what is available when and where on what days, but there my own experiences have been v positive of what is available for free. I hope this helps!