Fi from West Dulwich

Love love love these stories! Had me laughing out loud, thank you all! But I think first prize has to go to Sophiesofa's sister having to be sawn out of the back of a chair. I can only hope that O reaches such dizzying heights of terrordom.

So, 16 month old O is turning into rather a pickle. He is, I hastily and rather smugly add, widely acknowledged to be particularly jolly and charming, but there is no getting away from the fact that he is increasingly full of mischief. In the past month alone he has: - Dialled 999 during a tea party at my ex-boss's house. - Eaten a highly poisonous mothball within minutes of arriving in our new house, resulting in ambulance ride to hospital. - Fused the lights at his grandparents house. - Bitten his best friend whilst I was in loco parentis (mortifying. Despite frantic rubbing of arnica onto cheek the teethmarks remained when F's mother returned). - Picked up a huge and heavy dog bowl and smashed it with gusto onto the kitchen floor at Granny's house. - Painstakingly dropped pebbles in to the spouts of the water features at the garden centre, so that they all, mysteriously, stopped working. - Done a strip tease involving a cherry tomato and no nappy for my friends who watched in hysterics through the French window whilst I obliviously made tea indoors. Culminating in the proud delivery of a poo onto the floor. - Been discovered inside the dishwasher. We find ourselves alternating betwen paroxysms of laughter and tearing our hair out, but I am sure that we are not alone - I'd love to know what your own little rascals have been up to...

Thank you Fuschia - another early starter; presume fully functionning at 6.49 on a Sunday morning being enforced by small person/people rather than through choice!

We watched Marley and Me (slightly syrupy affair with Owen Wilson, Jennifer Aniston and large dog plus growing family) days after O arrived and we were reeling from the shock of no sleep, baby who seemed initially rather less than impressed wth his allocation of parents, and the intricacies of breastfeeding. Was at times amusing, bittersweet and really rather charming, and quite cheered us up seeing other new parents struggling. Don't necessarily trust my judgement, was hugely hormonal, but have very sweet memory of cuddling up on sofa and enjoying a brief respite and feeling of solidarity! PS just realised this post was asking for stuff that is NOT helpful, but at least should cheer up some long suffering new parents

Hello, may I ask what your babies/toddlers like to eat? And what easy options/cheats do you employ when you are pushed for time/energy/inspiration? Watch this space - working on a weaning cookbook for healthy family foods and am keen to pick other mothers' brains as well as posting recipes to get feedback. Input duly credited in the book! Thank you in advance for any replies.

Hi Louloulabelle, just thought would say hello after disappearing off radar since first meet. Was lovely to meet you and the other mothers, and O and I have only vanished due to being evacuated to Granny's in Dorset after moving in to our new flat and facing complete renovation. Once we are back we'd love to join you all again. Seems you have started something here! Hope you, E and bump are enjoying the summer. F

definitely definitely definitely the ikea cheap as chips antilop or whatever it is called - plastic (BPA free) and SO easy to clean, plus great up right position, unlike many of the more expensive ones which seem to tilt them backwards in most unsatisfactory fashion. also big enough for tubbies like O, again unlike many v expensive ones which have very meagre little seating gaps. doesn't fold but legs v easy to remove so can be stored or transported. can't see why anyone would need or want to spend more (?14 inc tray).

So, back from 4 hours spent at Kings A and E after O was found with what I thought was a Trebor Mint in his mouth. Refined sugar - aargh, panic! Quick taste test revealed was most definitely not a Trebor Mint. Call to estate agent (we had literally been inside our new house for 5 mins) to find out what were the strange mint-like things on the wardrobe floor. Reply from owner; 'mothballs, sorry, forgot to hoover them up'. Googled 'Mothballs; consumption of by mischevious toddlers'. Answer; 'Seek urgent medical help'. Ran to nearest Dr who said go straight to A and E. Aargh; no car, rush hour building up, and precious child (beaming happily) in arms - called 999 and sirens blazing, we made our way to Kings in style. O having the time of his life, making friends for life with paramedics and not a symptom to be seen, so it turns out he probably didn't ingest any as I snatched it out of his mouth in time, but we had 4 hours of obs done to be safe. Thought would share this little episode with you all a) because it is quite therapeutic after rather a traumatic afternoon and, more importantly, b) because I didn't know how to deal with such a situation and thought the advice I was given might make useful reading for others: was told not to give him any food or drink (even water) and not to make him sick; both of which I had thought were probably good things to do, diluting or removing the poison (I had read this in a James Heriot book. No, not sure either why I felt that this would be an appropriate time to dabble in veterinary science). Worst of all would have been to have given him milk, as fat would have increased his absorption of the ingested substance. So was rather relieved it hadn't occurred to me to let him breast feed. Turns out James Herriot is not so hot on ingested poisons in infants. And finally, DON'T LET YOUR CHILDREN GO ANYWHERE NEAR MOTHBALLS. OR TREBOR MINTS.

No need for daffodils - simply look for the frazzled-looking mother in hot pursuit of a very blonde, very big and very boisterous little boy, who will doubtless be scrounging for snacks from the other tables! Looking forward to meeting everyone, and thank you for a great suggestion Louloulabelle.

Fine with us, will wait to hear whether suits all, thanks for suggesting it.

Oooh, yes please, Oliver (15m) and I would love to join you all if that's ok. Tues and Wed pm fine for us too. Is there a plan that we can piggyback on? Thank you, Fiona

Yikes, good tip, thank you vhurleyp. Thanks for all these recommendations too.

Moving to a new place with lots of stairs and a very lively 15 month old (are we mad? probably). I know there is a good argument for not using them to teach children to take care around stairs but I need eyes in the back of my head with Oliver and there is a low level window on stairs which terrifies me. Like the idea of pressure fix stair gates but is my little bruiser likely to be able to dislodge them? Also, the gate would have to fit to the wall on one side only, and a banister on the other side, but most of the gates seem only to fix to solid walls/doorways on both sides. Does anyone have any advice on good brands, or are they all much of a muchness? Seem to vary in price from ?15 bargain basement Boots one to up to ?60. We need 4 sets so am rather hoping the cheap ones will suffice. Thank you in advance for any posts.

just bought one on ebay, thank you!

Thanks Molly, that is really helpful! Fiona

Almonds very high in calcium (as are most nuts and seeds) so try stirring ground almonds in to porridge or any other such cereals you might give him. Would not recommend soy milk due to phytoestrogen content having potential to disrupt delicate hormone balance, especially in little boys. Equally I am not a big fan of cow's milk due to high allergic potential and poor ratio of other minerals like magnesium, also needed for bone strength, so if Baby SB is not keen, I wouldn't panic. Just fill his diet with healthy whole foods, and perhaps give him some calcium enriched oat milk, either in a bottle or again in porridge or equivalent. Oliver is obsessed with live natural yoghurt (sheep's is flavour of the day, and also less allergenic than cow's), which is nice way to get calcium, probiotics and a bit of protein down him. More info on calcium content of foods here: www.nnuh.nhs.uk/viewdoc.asp?ID=752&t=Leaflet Hope this helps, F (nutritionist)

Hello, I want to get a sun shade to fit my Maclaren Techno XT to protect my toddler, and would be very grateful for any recommendations please. Don't want a parasol and am really looking for something that extends to cover legs and feet. Like the idea of the Shade a Babe, but does anyone know if it is suitable for toddlers, or is really just for tinies who can be popped in and out of the unzipped front section? Thank you very much in advance for any replies.

Hello, funnily enough I have had my eye on this school for a while, even whilst I was pregnant! Sounds brilliant, but very expensive and also quite a trek for us. But definitely on my list! Thank you

Hello, exploring our school options (felt it was time, with Oliver at the ripe old age of 13 months) - has anyone got any experience of the Waldorf Steiner school in Streatham, or indeed any other Steiner schools? Oliver is, I strongly suspect, going to be a jolly giant of a child, who is already boisterous and full of beans - I wonder will Steiner manage to harness his energy and enthusiasm or just let him run wild?! Thank you in advance to any posts.

hello, suffered similar agonies with my baby and all midwives said was latched on correctly but i just knew it was wrong, and when i took him to see a craniosacral therapist (search for mctimony chiropractors - much more gentle technique - and ask for one who is trained in infants) she said his jaw was misaligned from ventouse delivery and the nipple trauma was because he was suckling madly but without satisfaction and positionning inside mouth was wrong. fortunately she fixed it and my nipples recovered, albeit with much use of lansinoh as well. so glad i knew to take him as otherwise would have jeopardised breast feeding, which we have continued to do briliantly and he is now 12 months. good luck!

Hello (and to Snowboarder, we've been in touch before!) I am also a freelance consultant, although I do precious little these days around Oliver, 1, but as he gets a bit older I am keen to set up a sort of informal mothers' cooperative whereby friends share the childcare, so that say 2 people look after 4 children and the other 2 mothers get a few hours/half day off, and rotating it vice versa. We are moving into a new place in West Dulwich with a big garden in May, so I would be very happy to have a gaggle of little ones running amok in it. If anyone is interested in pursuing this idea do get in touch! I might start a new thread for this as I suspect this will be a bit lost at the bottom of this one, but it seems that there are lots of us with similar needs out there.

coconut oil - buy it in large jar from whole foods or similar, or online - the stuff meant for cooking but also brilliantly nourishing for skin and much cheaper than organic skincare creams. also use it all over baby too when arrives - inc to avoid/treat nappy rash and cradle cap. plus eat a dollop too - v good for you/them!

Thank you so much for your advice everyone. Still undecided but really useful to get the views of other mothers. Thank you again, Fiona

Hello, we would like to get a puppy and have an 11 month old little boy, so we are keen to choose a breed that is as bomb proof as possible with young children. Does anyone have any experience of Miniature Schnauzers or Airedale terriers as family pets? Or any other breeds that they would recommend? On a separate note, does anyone want to start meeting up for walks, with babies and with or without dogs, in Dulwich or Brockwell Park regularly? Thank you very much in advance, Fiona

Hello, I have just moved here so have also been trawling the internet for stuff to do with my 11 month old little boy, and have found Caterpillar Music, running in a number of places in the area, ditto Monkey Music, both of which offer free trial class before paying for course of sessions, and both of which I'm going to try. Free story/rhyme sessions at Dulwich Library on Thursday mornings, 10-12 ish I think - went last week and met some nice mothers, plus there is a Parent Toddler Group on Thursdays at St Barnabas Parish Hall, 23 Dulwich Village, SE21 7BT, 9.30-11.30, term time only, Tel: 020 8693 1524, which I might also try. Sure there is much more out there but these are the results of my searches so far! I'd be quite keen to meet up with people regularly for a walk, tea and chat in Dulwich Park, so if anyone is interested please shout. Thanks, Fiona