Ruth_Baldock

Keef Wrote: ------------------------------------------------------- > No one has mentioned walkin yet. Our little one > was 16 months before she finally got round to it. > We worry that she seems so small and young to lots > of other kids we see. Equally though, we know > she's very good at other stuff, and she never > shuts up. SUCH a wide spectrum. I had a friend whose son walked at 10 months, which had me platzing over S's lack of walking. He did it out of the blue at just-turned-13 months, but I hear anything from 9-24months is okay. Now, talking on the other hand. S has about 6 'words'. Close friends/family can understand them, but outsiders can't (apart from the incident on the 12 where he shouted 'WILLY! WILLY!' over and over again from Camberwell Green to The Gardens). I have a friend with a 17mo old (girl) who says whole sentences 'Daddy is at work' and such. In short, I dunno...

Seb was a right misery then. His first laugh was at about 6 months! Of course, he giggles all the time now...

Oh god, the poo disasters are never ending. S did a shameful leaking one as he was sitting in a buggy we were trying out in a shop. And yes, it did get all over the buggy. The shame!

Echoing everyone else, the autism link is total piffle. Anecdotally, me and my sister had the MMR; no autism. My brother didn't end up having it; as autistic as they come (that's not meant to sound flippant, sorry if this offends- he's on the low functioning end of the autistic spectrum)

I'm right there with you, Forum. Am knackered after a, frankly, god awful night with Cheeky S last night and was ready for bed at 7pm. In hindsight, that's what I should have done. Could murder some wine. A nice red. Mmm. Only 19w6d until I can sit in front of the telly breastfeeding and scoffing/drinking into the evening... Have a good weekend, all!

Don't do it! Unpleasant and only a small success rate. Hot curry instead?

Seriously? Well, I've run out of simple face wipes, so if anyone wants to help me out... I thought it was an interesting idea and saw where they were coming from etc but yep- the donated milk could have gone to babies in need, really.

"we are having kids a lot older, perhaps we've had more opportunity to climb the ladder and taste freedom... whereas our mums were torn away from (work) life much earlier on?" I know I'm not the 'norm' here (I am probably about to offend everyone here, goodbye forum, I loved you! It was good whilst it lasted...) but I am probably one of the youngest here at 25, I had Cheeky S when I was 24. I worked full-time for about...3 months before becoming pregnant. Then I went on mat leave, came back, am pregnant again. My contract in my current job expires in June, when I'll be leaving anyway to have Baby 2 and it is very, very doubtful that I will be returing to work, but this is certainly not my choice. I have a First for my BA and an MA, and a year's worth of lecturing at Goldsmiths, but I don't know what I want to *do*, workwise. Not lecture, thats for sure. When the children are both in school, I'll be another humanities graduate but will have been out of the labour market for 4+ years. NO idea what will happen, it depresses me to the point of howling with tears to think about it. I love my baby, and love In Utero Baby just as much already, but I never thought things would happen the way they had and I do sort of resent my husband (6 years older than me, been in his industry for life basically- and been working since he was 17, so he's a proper pro now...no Uni though) because if he took 4 years out, it wouldn't be NEARLY as hard for him to return. This does NOT reflect my Mother's experience, who was on mat leave with me for 10 weeks, and 6 months for each of the rest of us. She told me she would have gone stark raving mad at home (I used to be offended by this, but am not anymore!) and I can see why...if you never intended/wanted to be a SAHM, it can be a very lonely, bitter and resentful experience and very often it's a decision which is taken out of your hands. I think I have gone off-topic now and I am starting to depress myself. Off to scarf down krispy kremes, nom nom nom.

There is a newborn cocoon which pads out the seat etc, makes it more snug for bubs and that does the job just fine :) (IMO)

I've been thinking about this, and I didn't even realise how much I had changed my working hours rather than my OH. My MIL looks after Cheeky S, and on the occasions she's needed him to be picked up early- will always call me- despite the fact that I don't drive and by the time I get from Russel Sq to East Dulwich (by bus) I rarely end up picking him up earlier than the normal time anyway. A while back, I told her that it made SO much more sense to call OH (who works for himself) as he can cycle back to ours in 15 minutes and then it's a 5 minute drive to theirs. So she does that now. He always looks so triumphant when I get home and he's done the bath/milk/bed routine and I do admit, I am always utterly shocked that he's managed it :/ When I became pregnant, it was almost an unspoken assumption that my job would be the one to suffer. I was doing a PhD and we both knew I wouldn't be able to finish it because of various childcare sacrifices, and that's whats happened. But on the flip-side, OH wants to totally quit work and be a stay at home Dad and it fills me with dread. To make the kind of money he does to cover the mortgage, I'd have to have 3 or 4 jobs (not kidding) and I feel SICK thinking about it. We'd be screwed if this happened and we ever decided to have another baby (again) because I wouldn't be able to take much mat. leave at all. But, in reality, don't think this will happen.

From a 'child's' point of view- I was forever having injections and bloods as a baby/child, and when Mum got out the 'special cream', it would make me even more scared and apprehensive. AND it didn't work, still felt it all. I said to her later 'I wish you hadn't have bothered with the emla, it made me so much more nervous'. It's worth bearing in mind. SG88: The BCG hardly affected my son at all- he cried for about 10 seconds, then went back to grinning at us all. His sleep was the same that night as it always was (dire, at the time) and he was happy all day long. Sorry to hear you're having a tough time with Mini SG :(

We had a bee, which we just sold as we now have a Phil and Teds, but I literally couldn't fault the bee. Light, easy to 'drive', easy to fold and store. Bit pricey though, but it seems most buggies do cost a bloody fortune nowadays!

Snap. This kind of thing sounds right up my 14 m/o street!

Being not pregnant DEFINITELY helps. I swore at it and cried yesterday whilst S said 'Mama NO!' over and over again. In the end, a friendly neighbour helped. Ah well, community spirit and all.

Well, we've done it. We got our Phil and Teds. And the doubles kit and all that gubbins. I have a problem with folding it and also unfolding it, I don't get iiiiit, it's not faaaaaaaaair. My husband seems to be fine with both but me? Not so much. When folding it, the website and all people demonstrating it, make it look dead easy. Pull the red button/lever thing, push the button and then pull up- bobs your uncle. It doesn't work like that for me- I do what your meant to do, but I can't get it to fold, and end up practically breaking my hand trying to. My technique must be crap. Or maybe it's really stiff. Or maybe the website lies. I don't know. Has anyone else found it really difficult or am I just an idiot?

Mellors, if that worked for you then fab :) you do what's best for you and family and that's that. Tbh the snoring, farting and snuffling drove me mad too but s was ridicolously attached and a terrible sleeper. He got turfed out at 5am this morning, he can talk to his therapist about it when he's older, it's fine.

Me and Seb free Wednesdays! By April we will be: 1) 1 x 16month old cheeky and happy little boy, fond of giggling, dancing, playing hide and seek and saying NO. Also, sharing biscuits and bagels. 2)1 x 6-7 (I really struggle to remember how pregnant I am, but I'm due in mid-july in any case...) month pregnant Mum, probably still struggling with how to use the sodding phil and teds, even in single babby mode. We're in camberwell but can get to ED/Horniman etc easily (185/176 bus routes run from camberwell green, Seb LOVES buses...)

Yep, me too, even when I am not napping (rare these days, moan groan pregnancy yawn) I would read or watch telly (quietly ;) ) or check my emails or just take the weight of my feet and enjoy the quiet for a while. It is LOVELY to scoop up my tired boy from the living room and carry him into our bedroom, he is always giggling like a loon by the time I pull back the duvet of our bed. It makes any crappy day better, especially when he's had a 'Mummy can't do anything right/I'm going to be really, really naughty/I AM GOING TO TANTRUM ALL DAY. ALLLL DAAAYYY' type of morning.

No worries, Zeban. I have a spinal condition- scoliosis- which means I am unable to have any anaesthesia anywhere in my back or spine. I was under GA for my first c-section, and wouldn't be able to be awake for anymore. I would also be unable to give birth vaginally with the assistance of forceps for the same reasons. It's either all natural (have a feeling I may have a reaction to the group that Pethidine belongs to, judging by a reaction I had to a similair analgesic after a previous surgery) or out for the count, on the operating table.

This made me feel happy and really sad at the same time. Happy, because I can see how calm, serene and non-terrifying it CAN be for the majority of parents, particularly if it's an elective section. Sad, because if I was ever in the unhappy situation of having a section again, this would never be the reality for me and my husband. I'd be under general, so my husband couldn't be in the room meaning yet AGAIN me and my husband were both 'absent' for our child's birth. Dare I say, it actually makes me feel very jealous that sections CAN be this lovely but won't ever, ever be for us? Sorry to be so gloomy :/

Our son full-time co-slept with us for about 10 months. By that I mean every single nap was with me, or me and husband in our bed and every nights sleep was with us in the bed- he wouldn't settle before about 10pm and was up all evening until we took him upstairs. He'd crash out in between us watching telly, then we'd drop off about an hour later. When he was a wee little thing, it saved our sanity and was actually lovely. Husband would come home from work at 7ish sometimes, and we'd all go upstairs and veg in bed, Cheeky S breastfeeding and watching what was going on. He was a frequent feeder, waking up every 90 minutes or so, but I'd just roll over, pop him on the boob and we'd both snooze off. It only became a problem the more wriggly and cheeky and mobile he became, and that's when, after weeks of angst and discussion, decided to sleep train him. He CAN sleep through now, but he usually (on a good night, like last night) will come in with us from 5-7.30ish. It's lovely, Husband wakes up and hears him chatting, brings him in with us, and he snuggles in between us and normally snores back off. On a bad night, he wakes up between 1 and 2am and takes a good hour or so of wriggling and shouting and being cheeky before he drops off but we still get more sleep than if we were shush patting him for ages or whatever. He's 14 months now, and I don't really see it stopping anytime soon, but do worry about him sitting on New Baby when she arrives in July (now I know how much MORE rest you get with co-sleeping with a newborn, I have no problem with doing this from the get go). I love co-sleeping with our snuggly son, even if he is a bit of a trial. Our 2 hour shared naps in the day are lovely, and it certainly works for us.

Ann; a friend delivered (at 30+3) in France recently and from what I can tell it was the latter of the two scenarios you stated :(

Agree with LEDF on the cooked meals service; we get ours from Cook (http://www.cookfood.net/) and it's great! Also, on the days MIL has S, she sends home a meal with him for us to scoff but I'm aware not everyone has the luxury of family members round the corner. We try to cook and freeze meals too but tend to fail on that part... Don't feel guilty about Little Reneet being at nursery more than you'd like; it's not as if you're one of these celeb Mums who have nannies from 1week post partum then spend all their time away from their kids. Like you said, things will get better and quieter at work and you'll get your quality time back soon :) Hang in there! It's been tough, but it's definitely made me and S stronger- he's quite good and patient now (well, he can be). All help gratefully received, Forum! Little S should be awake and shouting at about 2am so who is coming over to look after him whilst I snooze with my earplugs in? Any takers?

on a more practical level. totally agree with WOD.

Reneet: I work 3 days a week (2 actually at work, one from home) and although my job involves lots of planning etc, it's not as highly pressured as yours (10 hour days?! WAH!). My son is 14 months, and is either active and cheeky or ill, so something always stops the lovely, serene baby-free post bedtime hours. I am 19w pregnant and EXHAUSTED. So much so, that I couldn't handle anymore children whilst Cheeky S and New Baby are small and, actually, my plans of 3-4 kids are no longer and I have requested Husband gets a vasectomy (!). It's really, really tough, you are certainly not alone. It's so much more hassle this time- arranging childcare when I have MW appointments and such. It's been qite a tricky pregnancy as well, and I've had to take S to the MAU/labour ward with me when I've had to be monitored as husband, god love him, is crap at coming back when I ask him to. (He does eventually, then takes S off my hands and I get a break but if I waited for him to mosey on down from work so I could make sure New Baby is okay, I'd be waiting hours). The low point was a few weeks ago: S had a temp of 40, taken off to Kings in an ambulance, mystery rash, lumbar puncture. All this was helped along with neither me or husband or S sleeping properly for 2 days and me having HUGE braxton hicks and being kicked in the bladder by New Baby. S was screeching, couldn't get a hold of Husband, and I just wanted to cry. It'll get easier, thats what I keep telling myself. It has to, or I shall be going away on holiday by myself for 4 months. Will leave a postcard on my side of the bed saying 'Gone fishing'.