edanna

Sue, that consultation was several years ago and parking near Northcross rd has definitely got much worse in the past 5-6 years. The Market extension and, if it goes ahead, the road closure, are bound to make things worse.

It's outrageous that the road closure was not included as part of the consultation and I haven't heard or seen anything to suggest that the council have looked at the impact on parking or traffic flow. Being at the Northcross Rd end of Fellbrigg Rd I think parking will get even harder, with loads of cars turning round all the time. There should be a new consultation including the road closure and focusing on residents who will be immediately affected.

Hi Belle, have you tried 'gradual retreat'. It's explained in the Millpond book, which I would really recommend. http://www.mill-pond.co.uk/info/millpond-book Also, others on here have recommended the Baby Whisperer forums. Good luck - you will crack it I know, though goodness knows it's so draining dealing with this kind of thing!

I have a friend who did a reward chart with her little girl. Being nice to her baby sister was just one thing on there, along with getting dressed without a fuss etc, so it's not all about the baby. And I think it's been pretty successful. I haven't done it myself yet because we've been doing rewards for potty training and didn't want more than one reward system on the go. I don't think you need to worry about always expecting a reward - I think the idea is that eventually the good behaviour becomes the norm and the rewards are forgotten naturally. Certainly that's how it's worked for us with potty training. And the reward doesn't necessarily have to cost anything. If you do decide to try it I'd be really interested to hear how it goes.

Hi SannePanne, Merry Christmas. I think what you're describing is pretty normal behaviour, which is not to say it's not really difficult. We have similar issues, though with a slightly bigger age gap - boy of just over 3 and girl of 7 months. I don't think there's a magic answer but here are a couple of thoughts. You could try putting the baby down more - maybe you need a mat in the room/s you are in most if you don't have one already. Be really clear about what's not acceptable - eg any pinching or biting of baby earns 2 mins on step or equivalent. I think 10 mins is too long. Try a reward chart for positive behaviour - eg being gentle with baby - and the reward could be something special you do one to one. Think of times of day that are particular hotspots - for me it's often bedtime - and try to reorganise that time to give your toddler special time. Try to encourage your toddler to join in games that make the baby laugh - 'oh look, she thinks you're so funny', 'she thinks you're such a great big sister', 'i think she wishes she could dance like you' etc. Also remember that you're not a miracle worker - I think some of this stuff is inevitable and hopefully she'll just grow out of it (that's what I'm hoping anyway). I'll be really interested to see what others say.

Food businesses are legally obliged to have a written food safety management system so the inspections naturally have to look at this. A good system that is followed by the business will improve standards. It's about anticipating various problems, not just whether the worktops are clean. I would definitely feel more confident eating somewhere with 4 stars than 2.

I think boys need around 2000 calories by the time they are starting school - which is amazing bearing in mind how many adult women consume less than this. Of course energy needs vary among individuals. http://www.eatwell.gov.uk/agesandstages/children/yrchild/ Mind you, calculating how many calories he consumes wouldn't be an easy task! If he's eating a varied diet, seems well and isn't overweight then he's probably doing fine.

Well done you. Hope you're back in your own bed V soon and all is well.

When we bought ours Practical Pushchairs was very competitive. Normally it's next day delivery, though I doubt it at the mo. If you're not in for the delivery then you have to rearrange or trek over to the depot in Charlton.

Thanks Pommie. What kind of food? Christmas stuff? Non-perishable I assume? Thank you!

The Salvation Army run an annual Christmas present appeal. I'm sure some of you are aware of it already, or similar schemes, but thought I'd flag it up. You can drop off presents at branches of Superdrug or there's an SA office near Elephant. I'm not connected with the SA but I well up when I think of children not getting any presents! I emailed them to ask if there was any age group or gender in greater need and they replied: It is great to donate a gift for any age, but we often don't get as many gifts for teenagers, particularly boys. So I'd like to get something suitable for a teenage boy but have no idea what - ideas please! I'm also at a loss what to get my 6 year old nephew because I see him so rarely I have no idea what he's into, so inspiration would be v welcome there too. Thanks in advance! http://www1.salvationarmy.org.uk/christmaspresent

You could just ditch bottles and use cups instead, which is better for teeth. I did this cold turkey at 12 months and my little boy wouldn't drink formula from a cup so he just had cows' milk or water from then on. If you're giving vitamins and your baby is eating iron-rich foods then I think that's ok.

Well done!

I think 3 is good. We've had 2 and I do spend most of those days catching up on the washing! We're increasing to 3 in Jan. Remember he'll still have more days a week with you than at nursery and more than he's used to. He gets to be himself, not just X's brother, and baby X gets some one-to-one time, when you're not doing the housework. Don't feel guilty about it because looking after 2 is hard work and you will really benefit from days 'just' looking after the baby. Good luck with everything.

Pebbles, I agree, we don't want badges saying 'I'm a nice mummy who has self-esteem issues. Please talk to me if you're one too'. That wouldn't fit anyway! I'm sure there's a stylish yet cost-effective alternative.

Coming late to this thread as usual and have cried through most of it! If anyone did try to strike up a conversation with me I'd be very happy, but much of the time I may not be confident enough to make the initial approach. I love the idea of the badges because I often think I could be next to another mum I 'know' from the forum but don't realise it. Ruth, do you have the time to organise? I'm not sure how much it would cost but I'm sure EDFers would be happy to chip in ?1 or something for a badge. Will help you distribute if you like!

Thanks for your advice. I'm storing it all up for future years too. We had the party yesterday at the East Dulwich Community Centre with Simon from Amigo's Magic doing an hour, followed by a simple tea, pass the parcel and mad running around. I'm shattered but it was brilliant and I think all the kids enjoyed it. We had some helium balloons, which the children loved playing with, though you need lots to avoid sharing disputes!

Charlotte, it's very early days. The poo thing is just coming together for my little boy after about 3.5 months. Stay positive and be prepared for a long wait. With any luck it won't take so long for your son

Have you read The No-Cry Sleep Solution?

Yes I think the present from the baby does work and ideally would be something that would occupy the toddler in the early days. It's also good to talk about what small babies do - ie they don't talk like big boys and girls, only have milk, cry to say they're hungry, tired, need a burp etc not necessarily because they're sad but because they have no other way to tell us. Lots of emphasis on what a very special and important job it is to be a big brother/sister. The mumsnet toddler book is quite good on this topic.

When I was pregnant at the start of this year, I went to Dulwich Hospital for a blood test but when I worked out how many people were in front of me and how quickly people were being seen, I realised that it was going to be a wait of at least 2.5 to 3 hours. It was close to lunchtime and I didn't have any food with me so I had to leave. Never did have the blood test because after that it was too late in my pregnancy for a meaningful result. It sounds like some people have been lucky but that's not my experience.

James, of course it would make a difference. Before anyone assumes that parking pressure won't be significant someone needs to do an analysis of the current situation. Parking has got a lot harder over the past 5 or 6 years. Actually it's very hard to park near our house most days of the week but Saturdays are definitely worse. I know I'm not alone in this.

There are a couple of things that worry me about the consultation. It mentions adding stalls to the other side of the road, saying that this will 'improve the safety for shoppers and traders'. How can this be with traffic going both ways along the road. Pedestrianisation is not mentioned. If this is the intention then it should be clearly stated. It also says 'We will ensure that the local residents and businesses are not inconvenienced by this extension' but doesn't say how this will be ensured. It's bound to have a big impact on parking on nearby roads - vans of 10 more traders, less parking on Northcross Rd and then potentially more customers driving there, when as Dulwich Fox says it's already very difficult to park on the roads off Northcross. It's disappointing that parking isn't mentioned in the consultation. I really like the market, but would also like to be able to park within 100m of my house!

Hi Sanne Panne. I think you have a phil and ted? You can get an adaptor to attach a maxi cosi seat to it, though I've never done it. Also Im not sure it's worth it because your little one won't be in that car seat forever. I don't think you can do it with a Maclaren, but it would be brill if you could.

We had a basic one that was just too small - I think this is perhaps more of an issue with boys because if they have trouble fitting their willy in you will have pee all over the place. We bought two of the baby bjorn ones, not the ones like a throne, but they do have a removable insert, and I think they are worth the money - they are a much more sensible shape than many other potties.