dulwichmum

Dear Mr Batdog, I shall look forward to it. It is a date!

Blue Mountain was good at the beginning. I haven't been in there with a pram. It looks too pokey for a vehicle! Do they still do the home made chocolate eclairs on a Thursday? Where exactly is The Drum, I can't place it?

Dear Mr CrystalClear, You did realise I was joking didn't you? I don't smoke weed while cycling with the kids - I just drink the odd can of Stella.

Oh dear Mr Keef, I am sorry, did I nearly knock you over? I try to cycle with my joint clenched between my teeth, but sometimes I forget! It is ever so difficult on my very long bus type bicycle on the path with the kids all attached in a long line on the back like the family Von Trap, but I am usually able to manage to smoke some spliff at the same time quite safely.

Hell, I'm coming to the next one, I don't care any more. Let the au pair stay home for a change. I want a social life too.

Dear Mr Crystalclear, I can't believe you don't remember much. It looks as though you were having tremendous success with the ladies!

Dear Mr AndrewDBlack, Yes, well done. It is great to see everyone had some fun. I feel as though I was there. Is that Mr Mockney Piers in that photo above with Ms Georga Bullock? I am looking closely at everyone I see out and about on Lordship Lane now, so if I come up to someone and initiate a conversation like I have known you for an age - it is because I feel as though I have!

Dear Mr Batdog, Sadly I shall be at my parenting class on Wednesday night. I am trying to improve myself. The image I have of you emerging from the waves - will remain until we meet............... Also, Mr Huguenot, regarding your family history - I would like to apologise to you on behalf of blood soaked Catholics everywhere. You know the answer to this whole gun crime milarkey could be to bring back the ducking stool - don't you think? There is an old set of stocks in the village, we could bring along our old organic veg, and set the world to rights.

Dear Mr Mikewbate and Ms Polly Dorner, It sounds like you had a great night. I had a social life once. I am off to the supermarket to do the shopping. Ho hum.

Dear Ms Polly Dorner, Do you have any photos? Mr even Mr Blacks phone number to wake him up?

Dear Mr Moderator, I should like a fivers worth of observing Mr Mikewbates self flagilation (is that a word?) at the Fair.

Dear Mr Mikewbate, You should get yourself a tin of spray starch. James is very particular with his shirts. It makes shirts look like new. He was horrid to me yesterday - I think I shall have Liliana starch his boxer shorts.

Dear Mr Batdog, I feel dreadful that you have been told off. I know that I have led you astray with my idle bantor. You have not been your usual self on the forum for the last few days. I don't want you to feel bad. It is my fault. Sorry.

Dear Mikewbate, Is he still in bed with a hangover? Someone phone him, wake him up! Mr Crystalclear, you look as though you are enjoying yourself. Do I sense from you that you will be posting on your flickr site that you are 'spoken for' again soon? It is obvious from the photo that you feel comfortable again in female company. Aren't you a handsome bunch!

Dear Mr AndrewDBlack, Please, let us see the photos? Is Batdog as handsome as I imagine him to be? Does he wear white swimming trunks (in the manner of James Bond)? Perhaps Mr Crystalclear could mock us up another photo......

Dear Mr Mikewbate, I would hate to offend the moderator in any way, and am in fear of going off topic even further, but could I watch? MY WORD, WHAT HAS COME OVER ME?

Dear Mr Mockeny Piers, If you email me your order by noon on a Saturday (and pay for it in advance by telephone - clearly), I can drop off your order in my super new capacious vehicle on a Saturday afternoon when I pop to East Dulwich to collect my dry cleaning!

Dear Mr Mikewbate, You are not the only one. Did you think I was seriously going to dress up in a rubber cat suit?

Dear Mr Mikewbate, If you contineue to feel queesy even now, please go straight to casualty. You may have some dreadful infestation!

Dear Mr Mikewbate, You are outragous!

Actually Mr Mikewbate, Why don't you phone NHS Direct.

Dear Mr Mikewbate, We don't sell our au pairs when we are finished with them! When they leave us they go on to full-time employement in Cafe Rouge. Really, young man, what must you think of us from SE21?

Dear Ms Polly Dorner, What a wonderful idea, I would love an opportunity to dish out all manner of ill informed and unrealistic advice - not too dis-similar to my current role at work actually! I think that you should never indulge in any kind of physical 'love' (and certainly not of the hairy or smelly variety) until you are wearing an enormous engagement ring. And only then until you are married, at which time you can give it up altogether! If I had a problem page, at this point I would rant on about men and their dreadful urges! (ha, ha)

Dear Mikewbate, I think you may be going off topic. Why don't you start a new thread about your ailments? I promise I am not flirting with Mr Crystalclear, he is like a brother to me.

Dear Mr Huguenot, Are you a real Huegenot?