dulwichmum

Never mind about your looks 'bout now sweetie, Mr Sutherland looks like the back end of a donkey. Perhaps you are a good singer or have pleasant breath?

chocolate

Thanks Pickle. I shall just pop over and check out the DVD set on Amazon.

Yes, I was patronising. I apologise for that. But I don't think that you can be ugly sweetie. Everyone has something nice about themselves. Do you have great hair or a nice smile? Padre Pio had a great beard (if you were into that kind of thing).

Whats it called though? I could really get into that. I am fed up watching DVDs about fairies and robots...(stomps foot)

Friends

I wish I could remember what it is called, because I saw an advertisement for a DVD boxed set, and I would love to watch it. It was hilarious when I saw it just the once.

Is that set in Wales (if so, it is not for me...)?

I was like that about The Office. I only watched it when the series stopped. There is a series on at the moment about a family with kids, I saw it once and I laughed my socks off. I must get the boxed set for Christmas. I fancy watching that.

You should go to Sheetal at Shilpa's. People wait an hour for her. She is amazing. I make Liz Hurley look like an unkempt hag (whats new?)!

Mockney is clearly down with the kids!

Yep, I don't get it either.

My mother didn't say 'aaaah', I had never heard her use a swear word before... And that was before she even took off her support tights!

Don't you want to hear what Brenda said when the woman attached the stirrups to her chair?

Declan (sob), I thought that you cared for me, but you make Tiger Woods look like a celibate monk. I am afraid that I have told you too much already (opens fan dramatically).

I looked it up on Google and I can't find anything! I tried a new salon this week in Tooting. It is called 'Shilpa's' - as in Shilpa Shetty! I think she owns it. My mother wanted to try eyebrow threading because she envies my perfect arches (admires own image in compact mirror). I took Brenda to Shilpa's because I had been going to Shavata at Harrod's and I knew that my mother would tell me off when she found out how expensive it was, so I needed to find somewhere cheaper. Anyhow, I took Brenda in, and for a joke I said, 'remove everything below her eyelashes' - OHMYGOD! It was like a sandstorm in the salon. I couldn't bear to look. That woman had no sense of humour and lets just say that my mother was thoroughly depilated...

What is the Miami?

Yes indeed (smirk).

Yes indeed, there is a woman who clips her toe nails regularly on the number 3 bus also. They ping right up the through the bus, and everyone is too intimidated to ask her to stop. I never cut my own toe nails, so I do not know how they are disposed of. I hate to think of HoonaloochieB having voodoo 'shit' done on his 'ass'. I must admit that I can't get a very strange image out of my head now...OHMYGOD!

I know darling, it really is NOCD. She is frightfully common you know. Ice and lemon?

You did see pudding mentioned! My man is more mouthwatering than the dessert bakery section in Marks and Spencers. I really can't recommend city boys more highly.

Isnt that place where the queen lives, in Berkshire, out by the airport, practically in Slough? Well, it is not for everyone is it sweetie?

Are you a banker sweetie? You are starting to sound like such a catch!

Karter sweetie, You don't happen to have a shop on Lordship Lane, choc full of vitamin D supplements to offload do you (bats eyelashes)?

Agreed! But I cannot recommend a hedge fund manager highly enough (smiles adoringly across room at darling man)... Yes he dresses like Rupert the bear, has an enormous gut and laughs like a girl, but he is richer than an Irish Christmas pudding!