*Bob*

Loz, I feel you should make a full apology here. davidh cares deeply - deeply - for the people of Poland; I know for a fact that he fights tirelessly for their leafleting pay rights on a daily basis, throughout the year - and not just when it happens to be Liberal Democrat leaflets and there's a General Election tomorrow.

By Christ yes, Matthew! Bloody dentists and doctors! Studying away for years so they can fix our teeth and make us well, without have to care a single jot for the consequences should anything go wrong. Bastards.

???? Wrote: ------------------------------------------------------- > I think reducing some of the bonus payments to > shares makes sense *Bob* and if we can genuienely > get Global Reform that'd make sense too. I'm not a bank-basher, nor do I know anything about the banking industry. But it seems to me as 'the common man on the P13' that paying someone (plucks figure out of air) five million quid as a bonus for success over a five year period could produce a more sustained and committed interest than paying someone a million quid a year, based on what they just did last month.

What's wrong with shares instead of bonuses? Why not? Apart from the obvious appeal of 'money.. now, please', which I can understand.. does not wanting shares say something about the level of belief and commitment people might have in their own company - and industry in general?

Surely by its very definition 'bonus' should be something extra, not something you rely on and expect as a matter of course?

I'm going to soil mine. If there's room for two in a booth, someone else is welcome to film it. Offers?

PB Is there anyone who works in the banking sector (I assume you do?) who thinks the Libs idea is of any merit, or do they all think it's totally mental, bar none?

genwilliams Wrote: ------------------------------------------------------- > Clegg's idea about limiting the banker bonuses to > ?2500 is the only LibDem policy so far this > election that I disagree with It's an eyebrow-raiser. But the substance of what they're saying is an interesting approach. It's only cash bonuses which would be scuppered. You could still receive an enormous bonus in shares (don't worry, bankers.. you can still get absolutely loaded!) but that would be tied-in with a longer-term commitment to the longer-term success of the bank, rather than doing anything you possibly could, regardless of risk, in order to get you buckets of filthy lucre at the end of each year. I suppose someone in banking will be along to explain how naive I am being here, but, given recent economic events, I'll take any 'voices of banking authority' with a fistful of salt.

Hardly anyone who has voted Lib Dem in the past has voted for them because of their leader. Indeed, 'in spite' of their leader would probably be a better description. I'm not exactly cracking one off over Clegg as leader, but I'm happy they've finally got someone who ticks the shallow PR box required to secure votes from the vast swathe of the population who vote for someone mostly because they've got a well-fitted suit.

Step forward, our wannabe chancellors: Vince Cable: Economics at Cambridge, PhD in Economics in Glasgow, Chief Economist at Shell George Osbourne: occasional speechwriter, failed journalist, Baronet in waiting, Bullingdon Club member - with an upper second-class degree in History. For anyone who's done History, you get an upper second for just writing your name at the top of the paper.

Cameron did well last night. He listened to his body language coach, perfected the assured lens-shot and memorised his highlighted passages admirably. He's still an insincere face-man with a mouth that looks like an anus though. Cleggers disappointed a bit, especially in the first half. What had worked for him in round one - watching the other two fight - worked against him last night as he seemed a bit out of it. He improved as soon as the other two tried to have a pop at him and rallied towards the end. I thought Brown was solid again. I think of the three, he's the only one who is 'of real substance'.. unfortunately I just don't like the substance. Anyway, don't be schmuck; go and vote Liberal Democrat next Thursday. They're the only ones whose policies and rhetoric aren't entirely based around either cynically retaining an existing group of voters, or cynically targeting another.

I have forwarded your comments on to Brian's agent to check their veracity.

'Scuse, Legal.. it's hard to keep track of all these submissions, you know. Who is Brian Moore again? Remember that if he's something to do with sport, I'm only likely to have heard of him if he's done something like cheat on his wife or been caught shoplifting.

100.. well I don't know about that. A tailors..? I mean.. I picked-up fifteen for Derren Brown in Selfridges not so long back; but only four points for Derren Brown in Selfridges, the other eleven for when he tried to hide behind a pillar as I pointed him out to Mrs *Bob*.

'Bullet Baxter'?! That's points right there! Ferret or not.

You're half right, Jez. In fact, Mrs *Bob* and myself take a perverse (but genuine) delight in spotting D-listers under the most mundane or incongruous of circumstances. So, for example, in out current 'international' spots: her spotting Andy Garcia filming an Ocean's scene whilst she sipped free bubbly in a rooftop suite in Bellagio might indeed be noteworthy, but I won hands down by bumping into Ricky out of Eastenders, coming out of a toilet in Space, chewing his face off.

That's not bad, Loz - well into the twenties there.

Narnia Wrote: ------------------------------------------------------- > What about Colin Jackson coming back from Seville > on Iberia? Compared to Stringfellow? On Easyjet?! Get real. Nul points.

Narnia Wrote: ------------------------------------------------------- > -10? It was a party.What if I throw in UB40 and > Clannad? How many then? I don't think you've got the hang of this. Let me give you a recent example of my own: Peter Stringfellow, coming back from Majorca, on Easyjet: 14 points.

Jeremy Wrote: ------------------------------------------------------- > I saw "Nasty Nick" on a bus a while ago. > > How many points is that worth? Depends on the route. Probably only worth 12 points around central London. Last stop before Penge.. you're talking 18.

In his home?! Minus ten.

Depends on the circumstances. This game has particular rules. Meeting Phil Lynott in a pub and sharing a beer and banter = zero points. Phil Lynott in Poundland, looking at pedal bins = 22 points.

You do know there isn't a tube as well, don't you?

Excellent news. Keep us posted. 10 points = Ricky out of Eastenders 20 points = Rustie Lee 30 points = Bernie Clifton (deduct 5 points if without ostrich)

Look him up. It only takes a minute.