*Bob*

The point is, 'Titch' that if you buy this record, you will in fact be stickin' it to the man, yeah? The point is that instead of buying some cringeworthy toecurler of a record because X-Factor says you should, you'll be buying some cringeworthy toecurler of a record because Facebook says you should. Ooh, I mean ummm, like, you'll be buying like a totally important record, with uuuummmmmm important stuff to say mmmmmmmmm. Up yours, Cowell! Woo! D'ja hear where those bleeps are? Those are where the naughty words were. BAD words. Reap the whirlwind, bitch! Zack? ZACK! Come back here and tidy your bedroom IMMEDIATELY? I beg your pardon? What did you just say?! Don't turn your back on me, young man..

Now go and tidy your bedroom. And turn that racket down.

Sorry for not stickin' it to the man, yeah - woo! Rock on, Brendan.

*wipes tear from eye* Well there it is folks, all over for another year. Stacy stayed in the competition long enough to complete her transformation into Roland Rat on speed, and our frog-legged telesales hero finally succumbed to darling Joe, who has promised to give Tom Cruise his mouth back now that the competition is over. Their future lies before them, bright and golden.. (yawn).. bring on the next series.

EXCERPTS FROM THE DIARY OF ZACK DE LA ROCHA, LEAD SINGER OF R.A.T.M. Sunday 13th December Up early today - for a Sunday! Busy day ahead, mostly raging (against the machine) but gotta get a few chores done too!! Had Brunch (Eggs Benedict), then raged against the machine for an hour or two. Headed out Christmas Shopping. 6pm - Home. Too tired to rage against the machine tonight, so watching Strictly on Sky+.

Ah yeah, love the song maaan.. stickin' it to the man - woo! How does it go again? Feck you I won't tidy me bedroom Feck you I won't get up before noon Feck you I won't, like ummm stop mumbling and speak properly Actually, given the choice, I think I's prefer the X-Fecktor winner, even if they were doing The Frog Chorus.

The montage in Footloose where Chis Penn learns how to dance. From Footloose, when Kevin Bacon reads from the bible to justify the overturning of the no dancing rule. And finally, when Ren dances out his frustrations at night in the deserted warehouse - in Footloose. If I was allowed four, It would be a toss up between the tractor chicken-race and the bit at the end when the geek starts doing 'robotics' - which are both in Footloose.

Having subverted the thread with random abandoned shoe pictures, I'd like to get back on track with an actual view from my window (previous residence, not SE22 alas) You'll have to excuse the quality as it was a spur of the moment 'spot' and I only had a phone to hand. I've titled this one "Why is there a man running past my flat dragging three car tires behind him?"

It's not 'Two Bogs' Daizie, is it?

jimmy two times Wrote: ------------------------------------------------------- > I can't make my mind up whether to toast crumpets > on one side or on both. Jimmy, you filthy beast.

You need to get yourself a direct 'Barberline' fitted, Townley. I had mine put-in last week. If anything urgent crops-up (toaster crumb-tray needs emptying, bum needs wiping etc) I simply activate the signal and James will appear within five minutes (slightly longer during peak hours) to deal with the crisis.

That's right, the neighbours cack their pants with envy every time they see my budget monitors.

Jeremy Wrote: ------------------------------------------------------- > Although saying that, if he convinces the rest of > the world that mono is the way to go, he could > probably sell one of them. Not at all. Stereo is a wonderful thing, but for the purposes of what we're talking about, it isn't everything.. and more to the point it isn't anything if you're going to buy a unit that has adjacent speakers anyway.

? ? ? ?1000 = entry-level studio monitoring. The equivalent of, say, you working on a ?400 laptop.

I think you've also made the mistake of assuming that my inclination to spend ?120 on a yellow mono radio must be the tip of an audiophilic iceberg indicative of ?10,000 of uberHiFi below. We have two micro system things, less than ?200 each. I have some studio monitors, which are (relatively) inexpensive at ?1000 We have a novelty Tivoli PAL radio. Of all these products, the Tiv is the one I like the most and use the most - even for working on..

brum Wrote: ------------------------------------------------------- > Damn it Bob, how did you know it was staged??! I'm an expert.. when it comes to abandoned shoes..

Well this is all rather confusing. Yesterday, I recommended something I actually own with a genuine thumbs-up, which costs ?120. Jeremy and you shot it down, on the grounds that it was yellow and mono and cost ?120. Mick then bought something something that costs ?100 which is nearly mono but worse in every way that the ?120 model, except wireless, which is nearly pointless. And I'm the bad guy?

brum Wrote: ------------------------------------------------------- > Here's one for your calendar, bob. Copyright rules > apply. It's called: The Gate Escape.... You're not allowed to stage shoe pics, Brum. That's against the rules.

Moos Wrote: ------------------------------------------------------- Have you considered selling the rights > to the series, *Bob*? I'm two short for my annual calendar for family and friends.

I understand, Mockney.. you've boshed a wedge on quality hifi and now you need to justify it. I'm with you.. me and my novelty plastic radio.

The Heaver Estate, Balham...

Gatwick Aiport, April '08

How about this one?

Abandoned shoes.. outside Sainsburys in Tooting

Are there any other kind..? And don't forget to spend 10/metre on that oxygen-free speaker cable. Otherwise your ?150 amplifier might not reach her full potential.