*Bob*

There's always Hebden Bridge, Strawbs.

Don't distract Alan, he's too busy making witty and urbane conversation with the new girl at work; the one with the low-cut blouse and the 'she might' look.

Think of it this way: You're on the train out of London. By the time it's at Watford, all the good looking girls have got off, it's started raining and the carriage smells faintly of sick. I rest my case.

You askin'?

Not sure, Brendan. It could be something to do with being too fat.

I think this is one of the few forums where the critical mass has been achieved. I don't know the specifics, but I think it's something to do with people having too much time on their hands.

Yeah right. What happened to the good old days, when you had to sit naked in a bath of custard - for four days - with your hands tied behind your back and crows pecking at your eyeballs? I have a friend who CONSTANTLY goes on sponsored runs around the 5Km mark. But she bloody likes running for god's sake - and even my Gran could do 5k.

Brendan Wrote: ------------------------------------------------------- > Whether or not a term is offensive has precious > little to do with the person using. It has to do > with whether or not the person/people being > referred to take offence to it... Don?t be a dick > and if you insist on being one don?t be surprised > if people treat you accordingly. *round of applause*

I'm sure she didn't refer to herself as a 'gippo' though.

We did view a comedy house in ED before we bought. I almost laughed in their faces. Bowls of pot pourris everywhere. 'Best of classical Music' playing (free with the Daily Mail, I suspect) Scattercushions angled to perfection. Mario Testino on the coffee table. My favourite was a bowl of fruit - in the bedroom

I give it a week

Jeez, you can't say anything these days. Personally, I blame The Hun.

I would expect there's an Equilibrium of Annoyance at work here; with people annoyed they didn't get sponsored on one side, and people annoyed at always being expected to provide sponsorship on the other.

IT GETS WORSE This from the urban75 forum: There was some trouble on saturday as well, in herne hill , police chasing about 60 youths down half moon lane, shops steamed and raided, pretty terrifying by all accounts. we have graffiti daubed around the area and sainsbury had a door kicked in and glass smashed. knives were found in the half moon pub apparrently. Will someone please call the South London Press IMMEDIATELY - they have missed a trick here, surely..?

As one of the more interesting posts, I'm surprised this one doesn't seem to have picked-up any responses - even along the lines of 'you what?' The Dream Machine is a record shop. I get that bit. You manage some bands. I get that bit too. What's in it for everybody else?

Riding a motorbike in London can be a dirty, dangerous and soggy experience. Sometimes all three. It needs to be incentivised. And thus, charging someone nearly ?400/year to park is stupid stupid stupid.

No - it was with the onions from my ring

It's hard to get a new girl in when you've got the old one breathing down your neck 24/7. It's a drawback. On the up-side, I've just been served a tasty sandwich with a side serving of onion rings.

No, I just plough on with the same old dross, as ever. Sorry to hear you've lost your mojo, Alan. Surely the ever-repeating threads about card cloning, moving to ED and children in pubs are enough to keep anyone interested?

The yellow Crocs are enough on their own. You could have also picked dressing five years too young, OTT designer spectacles, weekend-stubble-with-a-Blackberry or lack of a chin. But not the sling. With the number one ED-parent-hating-snipe being massive buggies everywhere, if you spot a parent with a sling you should rush over and shake their hand (even if it is like grasping a wet cod)

Fortunately I've never seen anyone over the aged of 12 wearing them.. yet. I'm not sure why fellas are to be chastised for wearing a baby sling. That's just bollocks.

Or.. you know.. at least worthy of a mention?

B..B.. But dc, I don't understand...? Surely the story of the three gangs armed to the teeth, all with knives having a full on brawl outside Cafe Prov and getting broken-up by riot police would have been of more interest to the South London Press than the ferret racing?

It's all kicking off now.. South London Press have got hold of the big story.

I can't believe you're all being so soft on drugs. It's all these so-called 'weed' smokers, cracked out of their head on bad ecstacy what's causing all the trouble. Carrying a bong should lead to an automatic five year prison sentence. I'm with Cameron on this.