Belle

yep - my son's reaction took at least a couple of months to appear - thought we'd got away with it! And even now, (he had it in November I think) it's still red and a bit swollen - doc says all normal, but def worth checking if worried about infection. The oozing etc happened to us too - yeuch!

It's funny - i really never thought about it too much (though I guess having read that book did reassure me) - and I do know loads of people who went down the puree route and there's no difference really in how the kids eat (except poss mine is much messier!) but I found it much easier this way for a multitude of reasons. One quite important one being that he was and is a 'challenging' little boy and he was always going to want to do it his way - and I found post weaning, the fact I could just hand him some food as a distraction and let him get on with it, helped us both no end! I think that finger foods are encouraged even if going down the more conventional weaning route? There's some common sense involved obviously - halving things like grapes, don't try hard stuff like apples to begin with. There's some interesting theory about purees being a hangover from when babies were weaned much earlier (3/4 months in my own babyhood) so couldn't handle chewing etc.

I did baby-led weaning with my baby and can't recall him ever choking, though yes occasional gagging like Moos mentions. In hte book bumpy is getting, it tells you that babies' gag reflex is v developed so you shouldn't be too alarmed by the gagging noise. The very first things he ate, if I remember right, were some banana, then some of my tuna sandwich (grabbed off me on flight to edinburgh) and then some bits of avocado my husband gave him - so all semi-solid stuff and he was fine with it. At the start they don't really swallow much, it's more pushing around their mouth while they work it out, so don't worry if you think it's not going down - it will one day!

ryedalema - that reminds me of my cousin's kid, who aged 3 and having clearly overheard my cousin complaining about length of time her hubbie spent in shower, asked his dad 'how long does it take to have a f***ing shower anyway?'.

Oh Fuschia, that made me cry - how horribly sad for both your friends, how awful that anyone has to go through that.

oh dear - am def now thinking, 'what have i said?!' . Agree with others ltec - why not have a word wit FRM as they are v fair and good at handling this kind of thing, think might be better than approaching the forumite in first instance if it's a particularly sensitive issue. I can think of a few times where people have questioned other people (perhaps even on the very issue you refer to, who knows) and whilst of course there will occasionally be a nerve hit, people to get that if they put stuff out there, others may challenge it. I think (hope) so anyway. Of course if it's very personal experience then that can be tricky, so def worth a message to FRM if in doubt. If it's just the one incident you're worried about then don't think you need to worry more generally about the forum - funnily enough people have sometimes said the opposite: that people are too willing to post negative stories of births etc (which is another thread!).

Can't read the links at the mo but guessing one of those is to that French philosopher? I do find her views exteme in some cases (think she reckoned was ok to smoke in pregnancy?!) but interesting and refreshingly different view points at least! And I do agree a bit about the way we become slaves to our kids.

It was good fun last week and loved the sandpit - was first visit there - but am hols this week, so won't make it this time.

When it's really hot we put our baby to bed in just a vest or PJs, sometimes with a light blanket over him so he can kick it off if hot, and then when we go to bed , if it's got cooler we put a blanket on/replace the one he's kicked off. I keep meaning to buy a 0.5 tog grobag but have two 1 tog ones plus winter ones and they are sooo expensive, so managing without for now. On holiday at moment and just doing vest and light blanket (one that's got lots of holes in if that makes sense, quite thin). I do prefer to put something on more for the psychological effect of it signifiying bedtime somehow.

I don't think any of us are having a go at people on the forum, please don't take it that way - I started the th read because I was genuinely surprised at what Boots were doing and guess I assumed if people found that not v interesting (I did say it's quite a minor issue :)) they'd not bother reading. It's true people can be defensive about formula but speaking for myself that's definitely not a reaction to people on the forum - but to the world at large. I wish I was imagining the negativity but it was definitely something i faced. I've found all the posts on this thread v helpful and informative - it's made me understand this wasn't a corporate issue but a WHO thing, for example. I did say from the start I didn't want to start a pro/anti debate and I'm glad that's not what happened.

buggie Wrote: > > One of the few quotes I can remember word for word > from my nurse training is "pain is what the > patient says it is, when they say it is, and as > bad as they say it is" (can't remember who wrote > it, and may have fudged the final bit of it!). > > Think that fits labour and broken legs!! i love this quote! Worth remembering isn't it.

Did people find that their midwives normally were c hecking position then from a certain point? Mine never did and I remember starting NCT classes at around 32 weeks I guess (maybe later actually) and everyone else had been told what position their baby was in and am sure at one point were even discussing how engaged they were or weren't, but I hadn't. I remember my NCT teacher told me to check with m/w who just shrugged and said there's no point till much later. He was early at just under 37 weeks so never really got to that stage.

I have to admit even as a formula consumer I hate those aptamil ads 'breast is best...but if you DO decide to move on from breastfeeding your child'...blah blah. Also you know the one with a series of crazed babies giggling, can't remember the strapline but it's along the lines of, isn't this a normal well-adjusted child? Er well actually if my child had a chuckle like that it would drive me mad... As ever I suppose it's just not black and white. Being supportive of formula feeding doesn't make you anti breast feeding and certainly doesn't mean you think the big formula companies are saints. having said that I'm pretty happy that there are people out there making formula (my mum was bottle fed with cow's milk - from a special herd which was used specifically for babies, can you imagine?! ALthough she's one of the healthiest people I know...)

No , I do see that Apenn - I guess what annoys me is when the lines get blurred - ie the campaigns you mention stop being about making sure the formula companies play by the rules and behave responsibly, and start being about bashing anything to do with formula/bottle feeding in an almost fanatical way. Recently there were complaints because a packet of Tesco nappies featured a woman bottle-feeding. I just don't really get why it matters (apart from anything, who's to say what's in the bottle!). But I do get the point you're making re WHO.

Oh dear...that just doesn't make sense, when there are warnings all over alcohol packaging and it actively damages health - whereas formula, wherever you stand on the baby feeding debate, is not considered a harmful substance. Oh well - a relatively minor issue I realise, but it's annoyed me now!

I found my course to be well balanced but my teacher (not in ED!) did at one point rather annoyingly tell us we shouldn't talk about labour in terms of 'pain' - she was very into Ina May Gaskin. I remember telling my mum and she was like 'but it is bloody painful I'm afraid'. Which actually I found more helpful in terms of preparation! But in general the course was good, covering all options etc. I think my husband found the bits addressed to men to be a little patronising but that's maybe just him being defensive! I haven't become fast friends with anyone on my course but found lots of friends locally plus existing mates who had babies etc, so have never felt the gap in that sense. I know people talk about the bond of having babies the same age, but in my group there was 3/4 months difference between mine and the youngest, so that was never going to happen with us.

I just find it quite a crazy rule to be honest, and think it's taking the 'don't promote formula' idea to an unnecessary extreme. Lochie - you make a good point about alcohol - I don't use a loyalty card so don't know, but does booze get you points?

I'm not so bothered about feeling inferior, just cross to be honest sillywoman! I get that formula companies are the big baddies etc etc but do sometimes find the WHO and other guidelines a bit patronising to the average consumer. I wouldn't have chosen formula on the basis that there was a BOGOF at Dog Kennel Hill Sainsbury's, I chose it because it worked for all of us. Lochie - have seen those disclaimers, they make me laugh for the reason above - it wasn't going to change my mind was it?

Yep...just seems like they're penalising the wrong person in this case - the end user.

Was really taken aback to see a friend's Facebook status saying she'd just found out Boots won't give out advanatage points for formula as they don't want to be seen to encourage bottle feeding. Can't quite believe it - seems almost patronising and v extreme! I don't have an advantage card, and when we bought formula it was from the supermarket so wouldn't have affected me but just think it's a really weird stance to take. Not trying to start a formula vs bf thread, please no, but has anyone come across this kind of thing before? I know that formula makers have to adhere to certain things eg not claiming it's better than breast milk, which is fair enough - but a company saying they won't reward you for something you've bought because they don't approve of how you're feeding your baby seems crazy!

I found it hard to find parts when I needed a replacement raincover (even the stockists Maclaren recommended weren't that great) but found one on eBay - one of those online retailers, not a private seller.

Addison Lee have seats built into some cars (you have to request them) but only for 1yr and up. I think in a black cab you can in theory strap buggy into disabled bit though admit have not done it myself. Where are you going? Just wondering if it's somewhere where having car seat might be handy since your baby is still quite wee. I guess this is where travel systems come into their own...never had one but was quite jealous when realised it was easier in terms of cars/cabs.

Yes def - I think a sort of matchmaking service where you could speak to someone who's been there one on one would be great, think it's easier than talking to 'peers' ie people with babies of same age (or that's what I found anyway). I found email worked well - I was put in touch with a friend's sister in law who doesn't even live in this country and we corresponded for a while, and I found hearing about her experiences v useful. Though this was PND specific I think it's a principle which applies across the whole new motherhood spectrum. So def count me in as a volunteer please.

I'd be up for something - prob not free till nearer 11 but could do quick sandpit and lunch (always think horniman cafe superbusy but haven't ventured into the conservatory yet which might be more feasible with several people).

re the tea group thing - that's interesting pickle/fuschia - I was quite cross as i contacted them several times about it and kept being told there would be one soon but that there was a problem with volunteers - I did make it clear how desperate I was too! So it's so sad to know you guys and perhaps others are out there and willing to host but for some reason the admin has failed somewhere. I found the EDF an amazing source of support though and have made some lovely friends through it, so think it's good to bear in mind that NCT is not the only route.