The Nappy Lady

May be worth checking out Ruskin Park 1 0'clock club too - not far from Denmark Hill. Molly

I always pack way too much so I'd say lay everything out, then think do I really need that? I aim to shed a third of what is there. I laugh now when I remember how much stuff I took on my first trip to my Mums with No1, though I don't think I will ever be one to 'travel light'. Have a lovely trip. M

Ha...maybe we could all tie yellow (or any colour) ribbons to our buggies!!!

Well home births are 'illegal' in the majority of US states I believe - there was an article in the paper about it a year or so ago. I think it was also discussed in a documentary that included some women in the UK giving birth at home without a midwife present because home births were not supported in their area (which I found mega scary I have to say). Just cannot imagine it being illegal to have your baby in your own home, but I guess the whole medical industry works differently over there. Molly

Yes, I had a special running buggy, 16" bike wheels, 3 wheeler with fixed front wheel and only 6kg. Also had bicycle type brake on the handle so buggy could be slowed on downhill runs. Only just sold through classifieds, but you would find them on eBay, usually fairly inexpensive as not a 'fashion' buggy if that makes sense. Mountain Buggys also ok for running. Hope this helps. Molly

Bag the weather abd bring it back with you Pickle, please!! Would love to meet up over latter half of Easter, quite tricky to keep both happy with the age gap so a mix of ages would be perfect! Molly

Re our Mums reactions.....my Mum was at my first birth and said it was harder than her own labours watching me do it.....and the next day she was full of aches and pains because she had literally lived every contraction with me. I guess one day I may find out what it is like, must be so hard to see your own'baby' having a baby. Molly

buggie, I don't think anyone on here is 'anti' hospital birth.....personally I firmly believe that choice is the key, no point trying to have a baby at home if you are going to feel nervous throughout labour etc. as that is most certainly not condusive to a good birth experience. I never had a labour ward tour, though even as a planned home birth I was offered one. I don't think labour wards are filthy, but I do think hospitals in general are probably not the ideal environment to be in with a tiny baby if that makes sense. But of course it is horses for courses. Can't speak for littleEDfamily but as you say I think that was just what came to mind in that moment. My family were all supportive of home birth, but lots of other random people commented that I was 'brave' which I didn't feel at all, but I know that is just because of my own view of birth, and I was lucky to have births that back up these views (very lucky I know). Hope all goes really well for you, and that you own baby comes into the world easier than you/your other half (perineal massage girl.....perineal massage!). Molly x

PMSL @ Keef, very funny.....maybe, like my Hubby always says, "everyone feels sorry for you being tired/stressed or whatever and they forget about me"....that's how I read it. Maybe a common cross for husbands to bear? Iain - where you been man? We've missed you. Molly x

Hi reren, A quick 'download' of thoughts, sorry if any of it seems to be stating the 'bleedin obvious' - As a Mum myself, and given you and your Mum are close I am guessing all her concerns are based on the fact that she is worried about the safety and welfar of you and the baby. So I think if you can you need to try to reassure her, and understand/validate her concerns rather than making her feel they have been dismissed. Then you can always say 'Mum, I do understand why you are worried, you are my Mum and that is what you are programmed to do, but X (partner) and I want to have a home birth if we can, we've thought about it long and hard, and we are going to do it. However, I promise, if the medical experts advise me to have a hospital birth at any point, even during labour itself I will of course take their advice and transfer. - Depending on her age, her concerns may also be due to 'her generation' having been firmly programmed to consider birth to be a 'medical proceedure' rather than a natural process. I was my Mum's 6th baby, but despite having had home births before, in 1969 when she had me, at the age of 40 she was MADE to have me in hospital, because FORTY YEAR OLD WOMEN DIDNT HAVE BABIES!!!!!!! A good indication of how times have changed (I gave birth at home in 2008 at the grand age of 39 and she and I both laughed about the disparity). - Does she ever come and visit? If so could you arrange for her to be with you for one of your ante natal appointments so she can ask some questions of the midwife? You can 'prime' your midwives about her concerns and hopefully she can allay some fears. Brierly also have meetings I think, certainly get togethers for mums and babies who have been under their care, again maybe you could arrange to attend one of those with her, and talk to some of the parents who have gone through it. I know some of them may have ended up in hospital, but even that may reassure her. - I know Brierly could give you a rough idea of how many parents end up transferring, but also will be able to tell you the TEENY TINY amount that ever go in under a blue light....it is very, very rare. Most decide to go in calmly, with a sensible discussion and with all present in agreement that it is the right thing to do. - Personally I FIRMLY believe that you are safer at home if a home birth is what you want, for a number of reasons; 1) You will feel more relaxed, in a 'safe' environment, of your own making and that you are in total control over. Don't underestimate the value of positivity during labour. Your body knows what to do, but needs to be 'free' to get on with it - interruptions, alien environments, car journeys to hospital all interfere with this (in my opinion). All this means you are more likely to have a better birth, allowing for of course some unavoidable circumstances than no one can predict. 2) At home you have 1-1 care from a midwife (with a 2nd midwife in attendance for the latter stages). In hospital the midwives are in and out of your room, and on a busy night can be quite literally run ragged. Again, I believe that any problems are going to be picked up much sooner by the midwife who is at your side from the moment you are in established labour. A Brierly midwife will already know you, and will be more sensitive to any 'changes' that may indicate that action is needed. If intervention is needed they may well pick up on it sooner than if you are in hospital, and as others have said, you can be taken in either under your own steam or by ambulance, and she can call ahead to have things ready at the hospital. For me the fact that Kings is 5-10 minutes away was a bit deciding factor, not that in the end we needed it. Also, an ex paramedic told me that whenever they get a call to a 'woman in labour, urgent', or 'new born with problems of some kind' it gets priority over pretty much any other call they may have and response time is often 3 to 4 minutes. I will add her that if not URGENT this may not be the case, one friend who laboured for about 1.5 days at home and eventually went to hospital waited about 2 hours for an ambulance as it was a busy day, and apart from her being tired there wasn't any medical reason for her to be a priority. 3) Hospitals are just plain nasty places, the beds are narrow and uncomfortable, the wards are noisy, the midwives can at times be over stretched (still wonderful, but working under very difficult circumstances).....and, let's be honest, full of sick people. Having had both of mine at home I actually really HATED taking them in as newborns so I could give blood to be accepted as a blood donor. Not that I am a hygiene freak, but it did feel all wrong taking my lovely, perfect newborn into a place that I knew probably had more than its fair share of germs lurking here and there. I don't mean this as a pop at any specific hospital, and if someone needs or wants a hospital birth I think they should have access to one, I'm just trying to explain how I felt about them, compared to a home birth. 4) Sometimes in hospital really little things can get overlooked that can make a huge difference to your first hours of being a Mum. A friend of mine had twins, and somehow they 'forgot' to tell her that her husband could stay the night with her to help. Post C section, she was left on a bed, with the call button out of reach, and the babies in cots, but unable to reach them or pick them up (due to the C section). She lay in bed sobbing until after about 4 or 5 hours a nurse happened to come across her. Said nurse was of course furious, and it all got sorted out....but how on earth was that allowed to happen. OK, twins - a very specific story, but I've heard of babies being given bottles against instructions etc. I dunno, maybe I'm just a control freak. Want my baby, under my control, to do what I want with from the minute she was in the world. Oh and having a bath, and then tea and toast in bed and tearing my eyes of her little face to watch the sun come up (first time around) was pretty amazing too. 5) Oh - just thought of this - in One Born Every Minute they always wrap the babies in towels before handing to the parents and it really upsets me. With both of mine we did skin on skin for about 2 hours after the birth, with a dressing gown/blanket or whatever wrapped over their back if need be. Skin on skin is REALLY important, and nothing better than just marvelling at their tiny feet, toes, hands etc. Don't wrap them up in towels and clothes (sob). MY BIRTHS: First baby - 5.5 hours of established labour, born at home in our bedroom, on the floor at the end of the bed. Born at dawn on a July day. Second baby - 1.5 hours of established labour, born in a birth pool in our dining room, in front of a wood burning stove, by candle light on an October evening. One hour later a couple of neighbours dropped in by invitation and 8 of us were drinking champagne in the sitting room! Not for everyone I know, but close friends who had ridden the roller coaster ride to having our 2nd, and we were all just so happy to welcome that little girl into the world....finally. Hope this helps. If I think of anything else I will post more, and do PM me if any questions, or anything else I could do to help? As others have said, it is YOUR birth and you must do what you want, that is more important than anything. xx Sorry this has ended up such a long post. Molly

Smiler, I guess there might be an update on the website? Molly

It was amazing, the will to survive that those tiny prem babies display never ceases to amaze me, they face such huge battles. Poor little William, when they showed him at 8 months still tubed up etc. and in an incubator I felt so upset, thinking of my two at that age and all they were already getting up to. Poor little man, I do hope things work out for him. I'm really glad they decided to do something a bit different this week, though it was very emotional viewing. Molly

I didn't bother going either, did briefly consider it, but decided there was plenty of help around afterwards if I needed it, and remembered it being a long old session. Molly

Hugs Ruth, Not much to add, except I saw in the Jo Jo Mamon brochure a thing you wear and slip a carton of ready made formula into so it heats it to body temperature which I thought was very clever - here; http://www.jojomamanbebe.co.uk/detailfash.php?type=FASH&code=B9158&proddesc=Snug.Snak+Milk+Warming+Belt&supercategory=BRN00042&branch=&wcategory=CAT00272&catdesc=&super=0030BRN00042~0010BRN00052~0020CAT00272&treecode=TRE00009 Suspect just popping it inside your stretch top would do the same job though! Really hope it works out for you, and that, if you want to carry on you are able to combine breast and bottle feeding. This may just be a temporary 'blip' due to you both being ill, so hope things will get back on track for you. Molly x

.....sob...you have ruined, I say ruined cbeebies for me, I am never going to be able to watch it in the same way again.

Snigger...that would be soooo funny.

Clowns are just plain creepy if you ask me ::o

This is how I remember; SPRING forward FALL back.... Otherwise I never remember which way the clocks go when without thinking very hard (like Paddington Bear)!! Molly

This is so funny....it is next Sunday 28th girls don't panic, proof if ever you needed it that being a Mummy sends you a bit loopy (in the nicest of ways....I only know because it says in my diary!!). Hugs, Molly ;-) p.s. we always just carry on as normal and they usually adjust within a day or two at worst. You can split the difference and shift everything by half an hour for a couple of days if you want to do it a bit more gently.

OK - here's another one...a really lovely 'water play' feature of some sort even if it only runs in the very hottest part of the summer. There is one up in Matlock where my Mum lives and the children LOVE it. Not sure if they are doing something at Goose Green, does anyone know? I tried very hard to get one at Peckham, even got some funding for it, and I am told it will happen one day, but so far all they have done is decide the old pool was in the wrong place (too visible from the road, too exposed wind wise etc) so they filled it in. Sigh. I tried really hard but in the end my energy fizzled out...after about 3 years, so sorry for that one.... :-(

More and more these days Baby C is getting savvy to the fact that she has water where big sister has tasty juice, and is also much more aware for her age of stuff like biscuits and sweets etc. because her sister has them at times. At 17 months her big sister never even knew about this stuff! I find I alternate between thinking this is inevitible and nothing to worry about in moderation to feeling like a very bad Mummy for not putting my foot down more. What do / did the rest of you do? Should I be making my 5 year old hide under the stairs whilst enjoying the delights of a packet of chocolate buttons??!!! Molly

Can do this week as doing a baby first aid course, but would be up for joining you guys another week - Wed and Fri mornings very good for us. Molly

As far as I know all the photographers named above are good. We have photos by Nousha and I believe they are a bit different because Lionel is an ex royal photographer who has been on the cover of Time magazine etc. so they have 'mega' credentials (in my opinion). I know they print onto incredibly expensive paper and print with inks that cost more than gold (imagine - you wouldn't want to press print 'till you were REALLY sure!). We LOVED our photo session with them, and were blown away by the results. I can't speak for the others as haven't used them, and don't know about their printing processes etc. But what is good is that there is plenty of choice, and hopefully something to meet every budget. Personally I'd suggest going and meeting a few/seeing their work and comparing prices. It isn't just about cost, but also about how you feel you get on with them - you need to be relaxed, how flexible they are - say would they do an early morning shoot if that is when baby is at its best - even if 8am etc and can you cancel at short notice if you have a crisis - baby not sleeping, or doing a nosedive in the park like ours did, resulting in an attractive bloody nose (typical!), and also importantly to see if you like the style of their photos..... and I guess you can check out what paper and inks they use whilst you are at it, not that I knew about this until we had our shots done! Good luck with it. Molly

We have stair gates top and bottom, but always let the little one do it herself, unless time doesn't allow / tantrums etc. At the top it means I can shower and she and big sister can play in the bedroom but go back and forth to me, without the stair gate I would be a nervous wreck thinking she might decide to bomb off down the stairs herself - and she too is determined to walk down them now, so it is a bit scary. Of course the other 'problem' to throw into the mix is having a 5 year old sister who is often trying to push past / help / catch her to reclaim a toy or whatever. I do understand the theory behind not having stairgates, but for me it is just too scary a thought as I know I could get distracted too easily. Hopefully not too much longer to go with them now though. On rainy days practicing going up and down the stairs is a great way to wear them out! Molly

Interesting, very similar to the stuff I have been wishing for, and I wondered if I was just being 'greedy' given we have softplay in Peckham (personally 'Yuk' but....), cafes in the park etc.... But this is our 'ideal' world so we are allowed to be 'greedy' and unrealistic! Will the ED Pool have any kind of baby pool etc following the revamp? I suspect not, but just wondered. Molly