The Nappy Lady

Hi BusyB, I saw a lady at Health Matters on Lordship Lane (possible Claire, but it was a good 2 or 3 years ago so I may have her name wrong). Anyway, she was very good and it seemed to help with my fertility problems. Good luck with your IVF. Molly x

Yes, I do wish they would show a few more straightforward/easy births. The focus this week was all around age which maybe affected their choice of Mums. The c-section baby Kairon (sp??), looked HUGE, both when he was born, and the size of his head when his Mum was holding him afterwards. Just as well she didn't push him out I reckon. I would love to know what he weighed. Molly

Just have to say, I think Abbey's Mum and Boyfriend are amazing this week, I am fighting back the tears, they are showing her so much love and support. I feel like I am pushing this baby out with her. M

Hmmmm, had a Micralite (one of the originals), generally liked it but found I was forever getting the front wheels caught on stuff because they stick out more than you 'think' so you tend to misjudge your width. It was good for random off road moments as easy to tilt back just onto the back wheels, but that gets tiring if you are on rough ground for long...and lethal for tipping backwards if you put shopping on the handles - did this with and without DD1 in it! Have a look at the new Mountain Buggy Swift too.....it is only 8/9kg (can't recall exactly), 3 wheels so narrower at front than back and both mine (1 and nearly 6) fit in it, even though it is the width of a Mclaren. Fully reclines and front wheel swivels for shopping but locks for off roading (important as we do lots of muddy walks etc). I have tried a LOT of buggys and have to say it is my last, and best all rounder - finally a buggy that does it all for me (hard to believe). It does what a Mclaren does, but with big wheels which is the one reason I have never, ever wanted a Mclaren. Molly

Yes, good point regarding chores being part of 'normal family life' we talk a lot about team work, so can see where there would be a conflict with pocket money for jobs done. Love the idea of the 'Hard work jar'. My 5 year old nags me a lot for sweets these days and I hate it, and of course the little one has cottoned on already at 16 months, where as her big sister had no idea about sweets until a lot older. Sigh. Sillywoman - thanks for the 10p per week for each year of their life, that's a good way of setting an amount. So, do you let them spend in on whatever - e.g. if my big girl wants to buy 50p worth of sweets each week do I let her (eek?). Molly

Ruth, something else I thought (though you post today sounds much brighter)....but if you are feeling REALLY down, and REALLY as if you may 'die' (not literally, but you know what I mean), please, please go and speak to your doctor because there is always the chance of it being a touch of Post Natal Depression, especially I think if you had a difficult birth and are trying to come to terms with that too. It is something that I think can be very hard to admit to, but I think I had a touch of it briefly with No.2, or at least my family thought I had, but I refused to accept it. Now looking back there were a couple of months when I was insanely happy, yet also on my knees all at the same time. No idea how it is possible to feel that way, but no harm at all in speaking to a professional about it. I just thought it is all very well us lot saying "oh it is normal, don't worry it WILL pass" but if you are feeling really desperate then PND should at least also be considered, and if it were that it too is normal, and nothing to be ashamed of. I hope that meeting up with some other Mum's with babies of a similar age will help, I remember with DD1 feeling so lonely, walking around the park and seeing other Mum's sitting on the grass together and resolving that I HAD to go and be brave and make some friends, and once I did it made such a HUGE difference. Something my friend and I are going to try soon is one of us staying at baby group with the 2 girls and the other going back to my house (very close by) for a big soaky bath / pamper session / book reading or whatever we feel like! I think this is something a couple of Mums could easily do for each other, and it would feel like a real luxury (I can't remember the last time I lay in a bath without a small child peering over the edge, talking to me, suggesting they take photos of me (my 5 year olds latest craze....arrrgggh no), or whatever. Big hugs again, and ignore those comments about your age, only jealous - I would LOVE to be 24 with a baby, at 40 I am on my knees by 8am most days! Molly x

....have a nearly 6 year old and don't give her anything yet (holding off as long as possible). Well, I guess she gets the odd few pennies here and there for school fairs / sweets at the shop etc. but no regular payments. I do think it is good though to help them understand the value of money and savings, so we probably will start something soon, but I'm quite keen on rewarding them for jobs done rather than just giving them a random amount each week. My friend has a list up - help put a wash on 50p, hang washing up to dry ?1, help bring shopping in from car 50p etc. etc. and her 3 boys fall over themselves to assist - even brought my shopping in for me when baby C was tiny - well worth 50p I reckon! Sorry not to be able to help more! Molly

Hmmm, I THINK it is changing after Easter, but if possible would telephone before you go just to be 100% sure..... Molly x

Ruth, I can't add much to what others have said, other than get the wax earplugs that mould to the shape of your ears for the times when others can be on 'duty' so you don't even hear what is going on...if they need you, they can come and get you and you will get some much needed sleep. I've been at both ends of this - my first, now 5 (really did) sleep through almost all the time from 10 weeks old, heaven knows why, I am sure it wasn't down to anything we did, mostly just good luck because our 2nd, now almost 17 months is still very random, and wakes in the night more often than not. With number 2 I co-slept for a LOT longer, and was very soft with her because she was a much longed for and 'precious' baby, so I suspect I probably should have got a bit tougher sooner (but not at 12 weeks). I finally put my foot down when she was about 13 months old and still getting me up 4 or 5 times a night and started going in to soothe her but refusing to breast feed. She actually got the message pretty quickly, but was very cross for a while (but always right as rain and sunny in the morning!). It is such a hard time, do try to take any offers of help you can and sleep when your baby does whether that is during the day or at night. EVERYTHING else can wait, trust me, I hardly did a thing around the house for 6 months but after one good cleaning session you would never know (which makes me wonder why I clean as often as I do the rest of the time!). ....and finally, if not too late can I say sorry to any fellow Mum's who knew me when I had a-baby-that-sleeps-through....being my first I was so caught up in the magic I had no awareness of how it might be for others who were not having such a good time....which is I'm sure the issue with talking to other first time Mum's who are also so lucky. We don't mean any harm, we just don't know any different. Anyway, don't wish to hi-jack the thread.....really hope things improve soon. Hugs, Molly x

Yes, I had the 5am waking thing for a while with both of mine, it is a killer - now back to 6.30am ish which is so much better. Horrible, but it is a phase that passes. If you have access to a microwave on holiday you can now get microwave sterlising bags to use which makes life much easier so others have told me (never used myself). Molly

Ha - found it (was starting to think I had imagined it)!!! http://www.madeformums.com/reviews/baby-gear/bouncer-and-rocker-chairs/beaba-up-and-down-rocker/review/753.html I have no idea where I saw this, how funny, but I came across it recently, maybe whilst doing buggy research or something! I have to say, it is a LOT of money.....so would think long and hard about whether you really need it. Could baby be in a bouncy chair at the normal height with an extra layer on, or an extra blanket instead? Hopefully in a couple more months we will be into the spring 'proper' and your house will feel a little less draughty (I do understand what you mean about draughts at floor level don't get me wrong), but it is so easy to spend a fortune on accessories in the early days, and I hate to feel like I am encouraging you to do so! Then again, if you plan on having more I guess it will get plenty of use in the long run, and it would be good in the early days of weaning maybe too, rather than a high chair (hmmmm providing excuses and justification now when it isn't even me doing the spending!). Molly Molly

I saw a baby chair recently that you could have on three levels, floor, settee or table height. IIRC the base adjusted a bit like an ironing board. Can't remember the make but I bet if you google adjustable baby seat or similar you will find it. Sorry if earlier posts are referring to the same product. Molly

You can get car seat travel bags - I got one from Soup Dragon last year. Molly

Hi, it is Health Aid, Acidophilus Plus. M

You may recall my post a while back about my concerns re older daughter's tummy/digestive system. Well, I have been experimenting with probiotic suppliments over the past month or so, and went on to a new brand as of Wednesday and finally we have seen a real difference. Also, no more complaints about her tummy hurting, and she is eating like never before, so I am convinced that something significant has changed. It is really brilliant news, and fingers crossed it will stay this way. Molly

> Yes am thinking this might work. I'm not very > good a reading the tired 'cues' - or I think I am > then cross cross cross at being put in cot. As I > say though we are on new regime so it has all been > change.....and hopefully cot rage will lessen! He will learn to love his cot in time SB and it is soooo good when they do! M xx

SB, I think if you stick with it he will start to sleep for longer than 50 mins, this is probably linked to the learning to resettle - after 50 mins he probably came into a light sleep and woke up, and isn't yet quite sorted in terms of settling back down....but if you keep going with it he will be. Also, my girls lunch time nap varies from 1 to 2 hours (and today was a rubbish 40 mins, down to molars coming), so it can vary anyway. Re lunch - what I do now is - breakfast at 8am, then off to playgroup where all very busy, but there is food on offer - fruit, toast, milk so baby tends to be snacking most of the morning. If not there I'd offer her similar snacks anyway at about 10/11ish. Home for 11.30am and usually between then and 1pm she will crash out (was always 11.30 to 12pm but has started to be able to last longer). Then up after say 2 hours - must be by 3pm latest for school run and to ensure bedtime is not affected. Depending how much she has eaten in morning I will offer another snack - can be something like a fruit pouch if need be as she can eat this on way to school in the buggy. Then dinner is at 5pm and will be a proper meal with the 'big girls' - always seem to have a gaggle of children here after school these days. I find she eats REALLY well now at 5pm and I actually think it has improved since not trying to sit her down to a 'proper' lunch as well. It took me a while to work this out as I too was a bit stuck for a while on how to work around the big nap. Molly

....but I believe Fuschia that T-shirts do not filter out all harmful rays completely, so suncream is still essential all over....sure you know this, but just for safety's sake wanted to clarify. Molly

Signora Focaccia Wrote: ------------------------------------------------------- > Yes, and a lot of the 'identities' who were so > keen to discuss this matter seem now to have > disappeared. ....or decided to stop posting in order to let MIND deal with the matter, following the post by FatherJack who started the thread, and others I believe.

....and just to add, we got one of the baby wetsuits for our little one for Spain last year as we knew the swimming pool was unheated, and cold to be in, despite air temperature.....it made a huge difference and she spent three times as long in the water when she had it on, so I think they are well worth while for very little ones too. Molly

The Outlook Shade-a-babe ones are good - cover buggy completely, but have a zip open flap at the front, so you can provide a 'window' for older children if required. They look like they are completely enclosed, but actually it is easier to see out of than into if that makes sense. You get various ones to fit different buggys. Parasols look pretty but only really work when you are parked up, and can angle it to suit, when mobile the sun moves all the time so they are hopeless, and also a lot of them are really flimsy and break at the sightest gust of wind. Can I also vote for UV sunsuits, and paraben free suncreams (which you can get from Lloyds Chemist, or Health Matters). My eldest would always come up in a rash if I used highstreet sun creams, but is fine with the (annoyingly more expensive) paraben free makes. We mostly use an Australian brand now - can't recall the name now, but it is sold in Lloyds chemist and is white with a pink or orange map of Australia on the front. It is really easy to put on too, where as some of the other makes I tried are quite thick, so you end up with a blue/white and very greasy baby! Molly

Thank you ryedalema for this thread, it's a good subject :)) I had one baby at the start of July and the other at the start of October. I actually preferred the latter, I liked the early days snuggled in at home whilst it was cold, and then having an older baby, sitting up etc. to go and enjoy the park with. Also, it was so hot when I had my first she spent her whole time just in a nappy, didn't get to swaddle her or use the beautiful baby shawl I had knitted etc. which I did with my winter baby. I remember with DD1, by the time I really got my act together enough to go and sit in the park with her etc. the summer was pretty much over. At the very start I got very hot and sweaty (nice!!) whenever I went out anywhere, and also when she was feeding a lot in the early days I didn't find it comfortable to do so in the park....so inept back then, I needed a comfy chair, cushions and all sorts!! Interesting though to hear how others experiences have varied. Do you think it is harder because of having older children? I think it makes a big difference because they really need to get out and run around (I had the luxury of my older girl being at school, so was able to have lazy days at home with my newborn all over again 2nd time around, which I did revel in!). Molly

So on that basis shall we all stop posting and adding fuel to the fire?

Do you ask permission before blowing you nose in a changing room Cate? For a breastfeeding mother feeding a child for 2 minutes is just as instinctive and reactive. I have no doubt that had the shop been busy and people waiting that she would not have used the changing room in this way, but it wasn't, so she used her common sense, something that seems to be lacking in many of the posts on here. I would LOVE for some of the 'anti' brigade on here to have charge of a baby for the day and go out shopping with a bottle, (as the closest option), to be treated as if breastfeeding and see how you get on, I think you would find it quite enlightening. We may as well lock this thread now too because quite honestly the debate could go on and on and those who refuse to understand the nature of breastfeeding, and have no personal experience of it are never, ever going to change their views or begin to understand what it is like. Sad but true. No doubt if she'd left the baby crying in a buggy while she finished trying on/shopping there would be people posting about 'how annoying it is to have to put up with screaming babies in all the shops in ED these days'. I am shocked and saddened by many of the posts on here as I really thought that in general people were supportive of breastfeeding. It is really sad to think that people are so negative about such a natural human process. I don't know why anyone is taking notice of an article in the Daily Mail. It is a 'rag' and nothing more, personally I wouldn't waste my time on it. I am sorry that the story has gone so far, in as much as I believe MIND were acting upon the incident and will put things right in due course. I do hope that their work does not suffer long term - personally I doubt it will as I am sure they have very effective PR, and judging by my mother's work with charity shops they are mostly swamped by donations. I am sure they will deal with the matter in a suitable way and that the shop Manager will not suffer unduly for his actions (nor would I want him to). At worst he may have to go through some kind of hearing, but more likely they will just provide him with some guidance, or maybe training. Again, I don't see any lynch mob, nor anyone screaming for his resignation/sacking......but I guess there will be those on here who want to try to turn this around and make 'localmama' look like the baddy in all of this. I still say Steve behaved wrongly, and so there will be inevitable consequences. I hope they will not be too severe, but had he not behaved as he did none of this would have happened, so why are people trying to make him the victim? Is there anyone here who actually thinks it is acceptable to spray an aerosal at a mother and 2 small children, and to verbally abuse them......really??????? Molly

One of the midwives was also talking about this on the programme (how women 'want' to experience giving birth 'naturally' and that there is no logical explanation for it, just an instinctive thing). Snowboarder, I agree with what everyone else has said, and although I did have 2 fab natural births the 'how' of the children's arrival becomes less and less important as time goes on so don't be too sad. I think the moment of being handed, and finally seeing your baby's face for the first time is much more important, and we all have that amazing feeling in common. The 'rite of passage' also has many downsides, not least the terror of coughing or laughing too hard ever again! Molly Molly x