Mathilda

I agree with Saffron about head movement being a trigger - I used to sit next to my daughter with my hand on her forehead, to keep her head still when coming up to traffic lights, roundabouts etc! Now she is older (nearly 5)she doesn't need this thankfully and though often feels sick in the car she is rarely actually sick, I still sit in the back between the kids for long journeys though just in case. Definitely avoid milky foods / drinks beforehand and open a window.

Actually I think there is a fairly good range now. My older daughter is 4 and there are plenty of programmes she likes with a main female character doing interesting/adventurous stuff - Dora the Explorer, Doc McStuffins, even Sofia the 1st is often to be seen in leggings playing sports or hiking. There are also lots with 50/50 e.g. Ben & Holly, Topsy & Tim, Let's Play (my daughter is always desperate for it to be Rebecca's turn!) The more recent Disney films are better too - you have Rapunzel where's it made clear at the end that they don't get married until several years down the line, Merrida in Brave who doesn't want to get married at all, and of course the whole (overdone) "you can't get engaged to someone you only just met" routine in Frozen!

(Mathilda's other half on this reply) Fairly understandably, I would echo (amplify even!) the positive things Mathilda has to say on here We moved in Jan 2014, and I still commute back to London (most days anyway). As with being a reluctant dad, so I was a reluctant London exile. London was in my blood and for us there was none of this "leaving London would be good.. y'know.. for the kids" We moved because we simply had to - and we spent 6 months looking at places in and outside London we could afford. And the truth is there aren't many places outside London we would want to move to but Lewes is unique (so much so it wasn't on our initial shortlist. I thought it might be "too good" to consider) The combination of Lewes life, Downs countryside and Brighton on doorstep is hard to beat - I can't imagine going back now. Have a listen to "Love Lewes" podcasts to get an idea of what happens culturally in the town as well.. but for me the Union Music store (free gigs every Saturday afternoon), the pubs, the local football team, live music, a great library, Pells Pool (oldest Lido in country), easy access to the Downs for walking are just some of the things that make up everyday life Even typical provincial achilles heels (eg can I get a good curry?) aren't a problem. Great curries and some of the best pizza in the country at the Hearth There are some beautiful villages outside Lewes and in Sussex generally - but politically, to give you an idea of the cultural comparison.. "Lewes" constituency voted Conservative at last election - that constituency includes the following: "Lewes District Council: Barcombe and Hamsey, Chailey and Wivelsfield, Ditchling and Westmeston, Kingston, Lewes Bridge, Lewes Castle, Lewes Priory, Newhaven Denton and Meeching, Newhaven Valley, Newick, Ouse Valley and Ringmer, Plumpton, Streat, East Chiltington and St John (Without), Seaford Central, Seaford East, Seaford North, Seaford South, Seaford West. Wealden District Council: Alfriston, East Dean, Polegate North, Polegate South." Basically (to generalise) the margins were such that Lewes town voted anti Conservative and the rest voted Conservative this may or may not be to your inclination? As for Neville - it's one of three largeish estates bordering the town centre (Landport, Malling, Neville). Landport would give you more house for money but isn't great. We know people in Neville and they love it but it is the one part of town that would necessitate a car maybe? It's just that bit further from centre. Otherwise you are looking at centre of town which is lovely but houses are what, three times the price of the rest? I travelled to Lewes on 3 seperate days to view various properties and would strongly recommend you do the same and not rely solely on Rightmove etc. From everything you write it sounds like you've made the decision now just need to refine the location. Good luck!

There are some lovely villages around but I haven't explored them much yet. Ringmer and Cooksbridge are the closest and you would definitely get more house/garden for your money there. They don't have much in the way of shops/services though so you would need to be happy driving into Lewes for everything.

Hello, We moved to Lewes about 18 months ago. We like it a lot, have settled in well and met lots of people. We live in the South Malling area and my daughter will start at S Malling primary in Sept. The schools are all good as far as I know. Feel free to PM me with any questions or can meet for a coffee if you are coming down to do a recce at any point!

This discussion is interesting...we moved away last year to a small town and we're really enjoying the green space and being part of a smaller community. Neither of us grew up in London and while we loved our time there, we were ready for a change. We weren't worried about safety in London - that was never a factor in the decision to move. Maybe just me but I'm skeptical that teenagers get that much out of the things to do that are specific to London, e.g. theatres, galleries. Surely most teenagers like hanging out at their mates' houses/at the park and stuff like cinema/bowling/swimming/topshop? Most places, unless you are moving to a rural isolated hamlet, will have those things within a reasonable distance. So it comes down to, can they get there on the bus (London) or do they have to walk/cycle/get lifts more (outside London). In summary live where you want, the teenagers will probably be fine...the ones round here seem happy enough anyway.

What is the maternity policy like at your current company? If its just statutory pay it might be worth looking to move jobs to a bigger/more corporate place now, I wish I had done this! If your OH is self employed then could he be the one to work part time and do 1-2 days childcare during the week? Its much easier to manage a freelance/self employed job around the kids. Childcare vouchers can help, also when children get to 3 years old they get 15 hours of free nursery per week. Other than that - yes it is just financially very hard when they are little!

Isabel Allende - Portrait in Sepia - strong woman making her way in the world in times of yore. Joseph O Connor - Redemption Falls is a more recent one in this vein. Definitely handmaids tale and poison wood bible! Tina Fey - Bossypants Mary McCarthy - The Group

OK thanks both - will stop worrying in that case!

So my 9 month old has started nursery 2.5 days a week and has settled in great. My one worry is that she hardly drinks any milk when she is there. At home she is still breastfed and would have maybe 3 x BF during the day, but at nursery she will have 60 ml max milk from a sippy cup (bottle refuser) during the whole day. Is this OK - it doesn't seem enough? She eats really well, drinks water and still feeds at night, I was planning to try and cut down on the night feeds but maybe I shouldn't. Any experiences / advice would be great! Thanks.

Hi, just to say I have 2 girls, the little one is only 9 months but already much more of a scamp than the older one. My own younger sister was the same, always the one wanting to climb onto the table, throw toys, rip books etc! So it might just be a younger sibing thing...

My second baby was like this, completely different to my first and a shock to the system! She cried for hours every day and I was pacing the floor with her until she would finally fall asleep around midnight. I kept trying to give her formula as was convinced she must be hungry - she wasn't, was putting on weight fine with BF. I co-slept with her in the crook of my arm and she did sleep well once asleep. Infacol and gripe water helped a bit, lots of walks in the buggy or sling were essential. It did get loads better around the 3 month mark which seemed like ages at the time and I was literally counting down the days. There is a book by Sheila Kitzinger called Why Babies Cry which I found quite helpful. Good luck and I hope things get better for you soon.

Hello...anyone find a solution to this? My daughter is nearly 7 months and straps are slipping off already. She would enjoy facing forward and / or sitting upright I think, but I'm not confident that she would be secure enough. We switched older one to maclaren for this exact reason but I love my bee and would prefer to keep using it a while longer! Thanks.

Hi, we moved to Lewes in January and really enjoying it so far. Its a friendly, arty town, good range of shops and facilities for its size, lots of green space, lots going on for kids. Our house (on one of the newer estates) was definitely way cheaper than Dulwich & surrounds but older properties are expensive. London is just over an hour a way but there seem to be often delays so the commute can be a slog, and the season ticket is a big cost to factor in if you would be commuting.

Sorry to hear that Annabelle, we have recently moved away from East Dulwich but loved Cheeky Cs. All the best for the future.

Hi, we used a babybay for baby 2's early months and it was ace. I got the Coco mattress from NCT site, it was ?42.50. Agree with jennyh about the bee on both counts.

The jelly babies sessions are great. I used to turn up half an hour before during the week and would normally get in, but if not would go into the soft play instead. At the weekend they are very busy so you do need to book ahead.

Hi, I employ myself through a limited company and am claiming SMP so slightly different situation. It seems to be a very fuzzy area but my accountant thinks I can make 10 days of takings at a rate that would be considered standard for someone in my industry. And I need to record these as 10 whole days work and have paper trail / invoices to support it if was investigated. So that's what I will do if I ever get a chance to do any work - with a demanding baby and a 3 year old I'm lucky if I get time to shower every day as yet! Hope this helps. Ive invoiced (& received payment for) work done before I went on leave, I'm not going to include that in the 10 days.

Yes definitely get them a few weeks before you go! NHS advice is to make an appt 8 weeks in advance. The GP should be able to do the standard ones for free, and there will be optional ones that you can either get a prescription for or get at a private travel clinic.

The John Lewis ones are nice, and very reasonably priced.

The one I went to a couple of years ago was quite militant - breast feeding was promoted as important above all else and something that you should battle on with through any illness or feeding problems. That's not really my view so would have preferred it to be more balanced! They also showed a strange anti pain relief in labour video at the end. That said the workshop did include loads of useful info & tips so was def worth attending.

Hi, I second the spatone iron supplement in juice, it really helps. You can get it in Health Matters. Also, I do pregnancy yoga at home from a DVD as just find it easier to fit in - the one I have is called Buddha Bellies.

Recently went to London Docklands Museum with my 2 year old, she loved it, lots for the adults and it tends to be quiet on Saturdays too. We just went to the Strada next door but there's lots of lunch options around. Haven't been on the cable car yet but really want to!

We use this company: www.getsetclean.com 02035363616 They are great!

Great news mrsS, I hope you start to feel better soon!