Pickle - I sympathise! 20 odd years ago when I met my American husband, I didn't think twice about moving to the US - leaving my whole family behind in East Dulwich and extended family in Kent and Surrey. Was fairly lucky for the first 10 years or so that my parents came to visit every year and they stayed for a month, but after my dad died, my mum wouldn't fly by herself. She came with my sister about once a year for a 10 day visit, and just this year decided she couldn't make the trip any more because it takes it out of her too much ..... totally understand this - she is 84 and it's a lousy trip - 8 hour flight, then change planes for another 1 hour flight. We have only be able to afford to come home about every 3 years. But as I said, I never gave this a thought when I decided to live on the other side of the world! It breaks my heart to think my boys (16 and 21) might never see her again.