Mellors

Gin? (for both of you) x

Its been diverted down my street today, so going right past my front window. They are so few and far between its not been a bother at all!

*drums fingers anxiously* I am just hoping for any of my 6!

I promise to catch up with you ladies very soon (baby due 8 May), but am meant to be moving house this week (eek!) and then away till after Easter.

I'd definitely be interested, although am not around much now until after Easter. New baby No 3 is due at beginning of May, but have been evangelical about cloth with Nos 1 and 2, so maybe can share some tips (and get to look at everyone elses cute nappies/babies!). When the weather is warm its lovely to have them in playmats out in the park just kicking about in their little fluffy bums. Also suits those of us with boisterous older children! Please do let me know when you get things organised and I'll come along.

I always made sure my morning activities were somewhere completely contained where toddler could run about without me needing to keep that close an eye out whilst I fed - either playgroups, friends houses, Crystal Palace 1 o clock club, soft play. I also had a childminder a couple of mornings a week after a while, so I could escape to Baby Cinema - bliss! Afternoons were more tricky as it was Autumn/Winter and rubbish weather - again friends houses, small soft play (Beckenham/Peckham - not Gambado), or, frankly, TV at home. It does get better when baby gets quicker at feeding and feeds less frequently. Remind me why I am doing this again?!

:( How horrible. Barstewards. In a nicer world, you'd have liked to have thought somebody would have kindly knocked on your door and pointed it out to you.

I had it done at Optimax, Finchley Rd. Can't quite remember how much - ?1500 fo rboth eyes sounds about right. I ignored them telling you you needed somebody with you!

Yes, had it done on the the Monday morning, had to go to bed Monday afternoon with eyes shut (although had got Tube home on my own, wasn't too awful) then could see perfectly and was back to on normal Tuesday morning. In my experience you'd need help for one day. Wish I had had it done years ago, its amazing!

It was only a new little one - don't think it could have been more than a few years old? Presumably the same people planted it a wee while back?

I saw them taking a whole tree out on Whateley Rd yesterday, roots and all, and shredding it.

To allow traveller's vans to get comfortably parked along it?

I think quite a few nurserys do it, despite it being against the law, or otherwise they would have to pull out of the scheme altogether to make running the place viable.

I've had both dogs and buggy-refusing two year olds. The two year old was way more likely to run into the road and get squashed....

Actually thats not true - you should be able to get all your time for free as long as you attend over three days. Here are the Government rules: The Free EY Entitlement can be taken flexibly within the following limits: * The full 15 hours have to be taken over at least three days per week and a maximum of five days per week * A minimum of 2.5 hours can be taken in one day * A maximum of 10 hours can be taken in one day, but no more than 12.5 hours over two days. You can take the Free EY Entitlement at up to two providers. The basic offer is three hours over five days a week, or five hours over three days a week, but many providers will allow you to take the provision flexibly, in a pattern that meets your needs. So, for example, your child could have nine hours at a nursery or reception class and six hours with a playgroup, day nursery, childminder or independent school. I don't know why you are being charged. I'm at Puddleducks in Nunhead, and they don't charge extra unless you go over your hours, or attend outside termtime.

From age 3, children get 15 hours a week free, term time only (so 39 weeks a year, not 52). Mine is a private nursery, and doesn't pro rate it or charge extra, but I know that some (naughtily) do.

Hard to say, it totally depends on the birth. With No 1 I was 14 days late then in hospital post CS, so wouldn't have made it. With No 2 I had her at 2.30am and was up making lunch and sitting in the garden the same day, no bother. I think you need to plan to take the baby round with you on the day - at a few days old they are really too unpredictable re feeding/sleeping/crying to leave with somebody else. If you take a pram with a carry cot you can pop baby in there when they are asleep?

1) How will I get the supper/bath/bedtime routine done with my eldest (who'll be 18/19 months when Unborn One arrives) with a Newborn? By tearing out your hair, and watching a lot of Beebies. Actually, I used to stick littlest in bouncy chair for most of it and just ignore any crying. Sling also v helpful. I dunked her in bath, put her in sleepsuit, and bf her whilst older one was in bath, then threw her in cot whilst I did his story etc. She slept loads better than him, probably because she was ignored from day 1! 2) Will the baby's crying wake up my eldest at night? Umm, dunno - mine were in separate bedrooms from day 1, but toddler is pretty bombproof. 3) How will I breastfeed a newborn with a cheeky toddler running riot? Husband has totally and utterly baby-proofed Cheeky S' room, so that I can take both infants upstairs, Seb can play etc and I can sit in the glider feeding newborn. This is likely to work about 5% of the time. Its all about the timing - I used to try and do the first feed before toddler woke up, 2nd feed when we were at playgroup/friends house in morning, lunchtime feed whilst toddler was having lunch, afternoon feed whilst toddler was watching TV/in somewhere enclosed to run about, bedtime feed whilst toddler was in bath. If in doubt, resort to Beebies/bribery and muddle through. 4) Lack of sleep? How does one do it without fainting in the day? I would try and get S to nap on his own during the day, and get baby to sleep at the same time as soon as you can. It was only having them sleeping together, even if only for an hour, that got me through the day. I also farmed toddler out to anyone who would take him as often as poss and tried to have a rest if I could get baby down. 5) Cheeky S due his second MMR jab right around when I'll have a teeny newborn. Is it okay for his Grandma to take him to the clinic? She'd have his red-book, but do I need to notify them/send a letter saying 'I am his Mum, it's okay, I give my permission?' The thought of having to hold him down (as I did yesterday, ack) and also deal with possible screeching newborn at the same time is too much and not fair on Seb, I think. Absolutely get granny to do it, they won't even know. 6) Am I likely to ever sleep again/wear a nice pair of non-baby stained jeans/eat a meal without being interrupted ever again? No, not for about 5 years. Mwhahahahahaa. Seriously though, you'll be fine. Its hard, I won't lie, but you get through it. Lets face it, its too late now, you have to! In hindsight I wish I had been more open to accepting help from anyone at all - cleaner was essential, and I wish I had pleaded with family/friends more. Also, after about 6 months I had to admit I really wasn't coping very well, and went to the docs for antidepressants, which totally changed my life (Mummy's little helpers as they were known in this house!). I had them for about 6 months, and it probably saved me getting a divorce. Wine probably helps in much the same way though (I don't drink, but think maybe I should start!). Loweing standards is essential. Eating ready meals and ignoring mess won't kill you. WHY am I now having No 3 ?!?!

I used cloth nappies and wipes right through with both mine, and will be doing again with No 3. If nothing else it saves you ????. The odd time I've used disposables e.g. on holiday, I was astounded to get through about ?10 - ?15 of nappies a week, and the horrid stinky full bin was enough to put me right off. My whole set up, which will have done me three kids, cost me about ?200 - ?300 or so, and I'll have had 3 x ?40 vouchers from the council towards that. ?10 a week x 3 kids x 2 years = about ?3,000 saved by my reckoning? Mine rarely leaked (and if they did its because I was pushing it and not changing often enough!), and I agree with just sticking them in a bucket then chucking them in the wash every couple of days. No hassle given the amount of washing you're doing anyway. I made up loads with babygros, towels etc. I don't know if its related, but both mine were out of nappies at just over 2, much sooner than lots of their disposable wearing mates. Hurray! Plus they look cute :))

Clare - it seems to depend on which allocated midwife you have as to where your appts. are held. I am due at the same time as a friend of mine under the Lanes - I've had all my appts at home, and hers have been at DMC? The toilet is big enough btw - I've squeezed in me, baby and toddler before now!

I think I'm braving myself to splash the cash on one of these for new baby. Do you think its worth the extra money for the Bee Plus (about ?65 new, or quite a bit more second hand)? Also, I'm assuming I won't need the cocoon as baby is due in May and it will be warm. Is it essential for a newborn? I'll have the car seat which clips on so can use that as well, and a sling (and am not planning mega walks all day with it). Thanks v much.

They only come out once in the early stages (for your booking appointment), after that you see nobody will you are about 6 months. Agree you could do it at the docs though.

Absolutely ask loudly. No question about it - rude buggers.

I hear ya re the early starts. Revenge for October, when all those lucky sods who don't have kids were busy Facebooking about their "extra hour in bed". Mwhahahahaha.

You have my every sympathy, I had exactly the same with my son, and it drove me demented. I did persevere with a bedtime routine, but to be perfectly honest, despite trying everything in the book, and in the end the only thing which worked was to wait until it passed - which as I recall was around the 3/4 month mark, so not long to go now with your little one. We started having the odd good night, and then there were more good than bad, and then it had gone. It wasn't an overnight thing. Good luck, I know how dreadful it is! x