Sanne Panne

I don't think there's any harm in getting the jab but I have the feeling that the flu isn't turning out to be too nasty (correct me if I'm wrong!)... so my 17 month old and I (12 weeks pregnant) will probably not get it.

If you've had a traumatising labour it's important to be able to talk about it with other people but indeed: please exclude pregnant women from your target audience (most of all first time mums to be)! Anxiety isn't going to make anyone's labour better. I had a great and easy labour so can't fully understand or judge the need to tell a horror story but again, I agree that you should be very careful when picking your audience. Of course this thread is going to give you the idea that NOBODY here would EVER tell a horror story to a newly pregnant woman ;-)

Always received it, on Barry Road. Administrator, is there a way to set up simple polls (e.g. with up to 6 radio buttons and a counter) within this forum? Would be useful for a topic like this.

Heheheh :)

littleEDfamily Wrote: ------------------------------------------------------- > I like the idea of a lovely piece of jewellery, > but, on a more practical level, what about a month > of delicious pre-made evening meals from one of > those companies who deliver (sorry can't remember > any of their names)? If someones does know any of their names please let me know! Baby 2 is on the way and I'd be more than glad to suggest this to my husband :)) It's not really a present I guess, the mum shouldn't have to cook for a good while anyway so where the meals come from isn't her problem anyway - but it could be a great way to give the dad some more time to do other things.

Jamma, I see your point and I agree that it is much more important to do your fair share from day one until the end of times but I don't see anything wrong in pampering someone as a sign of respect for the massive physical effort of giving birth. I personally find jewellery a bit weird as it does indeed seem to say "thank you" which is not a message I would be waiting for (along the lines of what Jamma said - the common term "push present" alone sounds rather awkward to me) but something like an at-home spa treatment could be a great way to actually give something back that's directly related to that physical effort - a contribution to his fair share (although I'd be happy with the treatment focusing on my face, feet and shoulders rather than elsewhere - no need to be that fair!). My husband got me the very best cheeses, pate, parma ham, champagne and other things I had been denying myself during pregnancy. We had a little feast the day after our daughter was born. Was lovely!

> I've also noticed several Christmas cards > part-opened over the past few days. I thought the > first couple were a coincidence, but now I'm not > sure. Anyone else notice this? Not yet but THAT would be an insult!

helena handbasket Wrote: ------------------------------------------------------- > I look much worse in a swimming costume > (everything seems, um, weirdly flabby......even my > knees !!????) but for the first time in my life I > actually don't care at all. > > I have never been less self-conscious in my life. > Feels really nice. That's me too! I actually think I look pretty good now whereas three years ago I would have been horrified if I saw the current Sanne in the mirror

- An alcohol free red wine that tastes EXACTLY like a really, really, really good Rioja (can't drink - pregnant) - Another labour and birth like the one I had with my daughter - MONEY - ?50k will do, Santa

intexasatthe moment Wrote: ------------------------------------------------------- > Work seems to be necessary if you don't have the > gas meter outside. Seems to be true in our case, we are 4 flats with the gas meters outside and they only dug up the pavement - no need to get into the building. We were without gas for one day and the hole in the pavement was there for 6 days. Could be worse.

lorraineliyanage Wrote: ------------------------------------------------------- > I'm starting up a new playgroup on Thursday > mornings at Push Studios, we'd love some toys for > the playgroup! Start a thread about it, you'll get LOADS from this forum!

I lived on red raspberry leaf tea too and she DID come early, at 37w6d with no prior warning (I was even included in the King's research about risk for early delivery and they said there wasn't the slightest indication she'd be early). My waters broke 3 hours after the fire alarm went off at home (worse actually, I was holding the alarm in my hands as I was changing the batteries in the middle of the night and did something wrong) so maybe the adrenaline rush had something to do with it. Just a suggestion ;-) I had a great labour that was so quick (maybe thanks to the RRL tea? I don't think it made her come early but it may have improved the experience) that I ended up with an unplanned homebirth (with the great Oakwood midwives there). Couldn't have been better! Edited for typos...

Thanks for all the tips so far! Might head down to Purley Way soon... and will definitely have a look in the shop on Rye Lane too. I remember spotting it ages ago (it's pretty close to the beginning coming from the Common) but forgot about it again. And Molly, I've been stalking plenty of parents, childminders and grandparents already - will keep doing it! Nothing like a first hand review. With the online reviews you never know if it's genuine or (in the case of a raving one) if it was written by an employee of the company.

I really, really don't know what double buggy to get when baby 2 arrives and baby 1 is too small to always walk or always be on a buggy board. I got some great advice in a thread I posted earlier but would still like to see, feel and try a few different models. Isn't there supposed to be a massive buggy/pushchair warehouse somewhere in South London? Does anyone know where it is and what it's called?

All very true Molly! For the same reason you counted your breaths I used a TENS machine. Well, I originally got it for pain relief but in hindsight I think the main benefit was that it kept me occupied - it turned the contractions into a little ritual. Lots of women have great birth experiences but like you said Clare, you tend to hear or read about the negative stories more often. We should start a positivie birth stories thread here some day.

Does she eat omelettes? That's a great finger food in which you can hide lots of finely chopped greens and other foods you're worrying she isn't eating enough of! It doesn't really help in terms of teaching her to eat those foods but at least she gets the nutrients in the meantime if you're concerned... You can also hide some pureed veg (and grated cheese) in the pasta sauce. My daughter also went through phases while weaning (in fact until about 14 months), sometimes happily eating broccoli florets, sometimes refusing everything green, sometimes refusing the spoon and so on. The spoon refusal actually lasted 2-3 months... very annoying but it will improve again at some point! Edited to add that they sometimes like the weirdest things that you'd only consider adult food such as garlic shrimp...

I just have some anecdotal input, a friend of mine in the US just had her baby after PGD (first try was a success) after 3 early miscarriages through "natural conception". I know one example isn't statistically relevant but still want to wish you luck!

Alternatively you could try SLIM (South London Independent Midwives) but they charge about ?5k I believe (don't quote me on that - but you pay quite a bit).

I'm now spending money on the guaranteed next day delivery service for things I can really not buy in a shop. I really hope that service does work, I think it goes through slightly different channels. But they don't deserve to receive my money of course. Not for this reason...

Agree with sillywoman, it's worth building the relationship with a new team if you're not sure whether they're going to be operational again in May. And by now the Lanes/Oakwood midwives know whether they'll have spaces for May (as not many patients of the GP practices they operate from will still be discovering that they're pregnant and are due in May ;-)). If they're being difficult about admitting you because they're nearly booked up, you can always switch to their respective GP practices - which pretty much gives you the right to use their services (a bit cheeky I know.. .:-$).

If the hospitals are indeed pretty much the same as sillywoman says I would choose the one that's nearest - King's. If your labour is fast or intense (mine was so fast I never made it to hospital and it was my first baby - it was a great experience though!) you want to spend as little time as possible in a car/cab feeling uncomfortable and/or worrying about traffic. As I told you when we met earlier today, having your own midwives accompany you to hospital can make a world of difference... the Forest Hill Road GP practice has this service and I believe the Dulwich Medical Centre now do it too (both for King's). If you switch GP practice to one of those (double check with the Dulwich Medical Centre that their midwives are indeed allowed to deliver your baby in hospital) you will have access to their midwives who are absolutely great.

I'm pregnant with #2 and if all goes well our children will have a 23 month age gap, which is pretty much what we had hoped for. In a way we're still adjusting to life with a baby/toddler but we're of the "you might as well get on with it" school - we love the newborn phase but the early months/years are tough (as you know) - so why not deal with the lovely but tough and sleep deprived bit within a relatively short space of time (as Smiler said, if luck is with you - sorry you've had to go through miscarriages Smiler, the thought alone breaks my heart :(). And who knows, we may find out that the tough bit only starts at age 3 when they smash each other's heads with My First Laptops, but we'll see about that when the time comes. One of the reasons we want to "get on with it" is that I don't want to work full time before our kids go to school but we can't afford that lifestyle forever, not if we want to live in a 3 bed house with a garden one day. So the closer the children are in age, the sooner I can get back to making a relevant income again. If that's your case too, it may be worth considering a relatively small age gap. And last but not least I'm almost 36, which is really not that old but as time goes by so might the ease with which we get pregnant, although again that may just be prejudice (and probably varies tremendously between one woman and the other). My sister and I have 4.5 years between us, it wasn't planned that way but it happened, and my mum says it was lovely as she was able to fully enjoy both babies individually, so that's another way of looking at it.

Tue, Wed and Thu all sound good (I have a preference for Thu). I think it would be great to start as early in the morning as possible (9 or 10am) because of the majority of the bigger babies' and toddlers' naptime.

Sorry this is not local (my class was near Regent's Park) but it was absolutely great (teacher was a very experienced and lively paramedic) and very affordable. Just in case you don't get a good local recommendation: safeandsound.uk.net

How old is babySB? How long have you been at home already? I think you can only really know if being a stay-at-home mum is for you by trying it for at least a year (unless you know in advance that you don't want to do it). I did it for 15 months and then got an itch to spend a few days a week doing something else (in part because I didn't really know how to entertain my baby all day every day (bit embarrassed to say that I was running out of inspiration) and in part because I thought it would be good for her to spend some time with other babies as well). But I don't want to work full time until kids are in school if we can keep affording it. To me, the ideal solution is to work part time BUT it in spite of (or maybe because of) my degree and experience it is VERY hard to find part time work if you don't do a natural transition by going back to your old job (or at least old company - I took voluntary redundancy because of the great package but in hindsight maybe I shouldn't have) in a part time capacity. For interesting jobs, the culture in the UK seems to be that you "can only do them full-time", which I don't agree with at all coming from a culture where plenty of high ranking jobs are done part time or as a job share, even by men. Not sure about flexible childcare - I believe some childminders can do it and there are also ad hoc services but those are expensive - you may be better off blocking two or three days a week and trying to get your work done in those days. One thing I've experienced is that doing a bit of work in the evenings after a full day with my baby is just too much (for me at least). If you do want to go for part time work at some point, definitely have a look at www.womenlikeus.org.uk and also consider becoming self employed like I did. Good luck with your decision!