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The question of which condiment with the bacon sanger has been raised.

Always the correct form when addressing the porker who died for your breakfast is HP. If for some reason the house has sat with no HP then Heinz tomato ketchup on the right hand slice of bread and a decent slather of Colman's English mustard on the left is acceptable.

If you're fortunate enough to have had access to the 99p shop in Brixton and now have a supply of Branston's gherkin relish (alas no Bix's cucumber relish, but there we are), then on summer morning when a person is feeling frivolous, it's just the job.

4 rashers of extra-virgin pork, triple cured on a bed of oak-smoked whiskey barrels

2 slices homemade spelt brioche, gently coaxed from a hand-greased tin

Three san marzano tomatoes, dried under an Italian sun then pulped with an ostentatious pestle and mortar.


Serve with The Guardian.

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