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Dishwasher

drew

By drew
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SimonM

SimonM

Posted
Posted

Well, the evidence suggests that your lifestyle does not appear to warrant a dishwasher at all. Indeed, I have reasonable cause to believe that you live on Scoop's coconut ice cream



This is a vile and base calumny, and clearly libellous. I had mint choc chip at the weekend (paid for with one of mys sisters, getting my mother in change: still not sure who had the real bargain there :'(). Anyway expect my chap popping around to serve the writ any day now...


The new dishwasher is the dog's bollocks!

katie1997

katie1997

Posted
Posted

Ladymuck Wrote:

-------------------------------------------------------

> katie1997 Wrote:

>

> > *rings SCIC VIP hotline to reserve stocks*

>

>

> Ahem!

>

> *couriers Notice to katie1997 in respect of

> infringement of intellectual property primary

> right: unauthorised use of Trademark SCIC*


*respectfully submits application to use SCIC trademark to ladymuck*


I mean....does woof(trade)markthedog have the monopoly on these or what? Y-es I thought so!


Katie1997


Oh dishwashers are great btw, did I mention that Bosch are good?


Edited: Bosch obviously..

Ladymuck

Ladymuck

Posted
Posted

SimonM Wrote:

-------------------------------------------------------

> This is a vile and base calumny, and clearly

> libellous. I had mint choc chip at the weekend...


Given the available data on the now rather famous EDF. My on-line observations constitute "fair comment" in that they were fair and not motivated by malice. Moreover, not only do my observations fall short of being false, they also fail to discredit your reputation (such as it is). Had I referred to you as (but, for want of another example) a "greedy pig" now, that would have been quite another matter:))).


> Anyway expect my chap popping

> around to serve the writ any day now...


Given your manifest lack of evidence, and the fact that your reputation has suffered no damage, it is my submission that you, the Plaintiff, have no case to answer. Notwithstanding this and in an attempt to demonstrate goodwill, I would be prepared to accept a small token from you in return for foregoing a counter-action against you for injury to my feelings which your - rather misguided - initiation of legal proceedings against me have caused to my egg-shell like personality. Under the circumstances, I feel that a double scoop (large) of SCIC(TM) (together with a sample of the mint choc chip) would be appropriate.


> The new dishwasher is the dog's bollocks!


This was never in dispute. And, having now viewed the photograph, remains so. In any event, it is irrelevant as not pertinent to the legal matter at hand.

woofmarkthedog

woofmarkthedog

Posted
Posted

legalbeagle Wrote:

-------------------------------------------------------

> I thought a "pony" was slang for fifty quid? You

> know, like:

>

> I've got a pony in my pocket

> I'll get the suitcase from the

> Cos if you want the best, but you don't ask

> questions

> Then brother, I'm your man

...................::...............

What...


...a load of "pony & trap"



Really....




w**F


>

> No?

Ladymuck

Ladymuck

Posted
Posted

katie1997 Wrote:

-------------------------------------------------------

> *respectfully submits application to use SCIC

> trademark to ladymuck*





Dear Ms. Katherina Van Der Wotsit,


In consideration of your previous, rather gracious, loan to me of your chauffeur, I would be prepared to permit you to use the trademark SCIC.


I would stress, however, that this act of generosity on my part should not be taken as a precedent for the future - any abuse of which shall result in my immediately seeking an injunction against you with a view to obtaining damages for infringement of registered trade mark and passing off.


Lady Esmerelda Fatima Billington-Jones.

HonaloochieB

HonaloochieB

Posted
Posted

SimonM Wrote:

-------------------------------------------------------


> The new dishwasher is the dog's bollocks!


Plainly both unhygienic and what's more needlessly cruel.

Expect a visit from the RSPCA and the Health & Safety Executive in the near future.

I won't dob you in to the Animal Liberation Front for the moment, Christ no one deserves that.

Ladymuck

Ladymuck

Posted
Posted

Actually, this all reminds me of a (terrible) joke...


Woman has to go out...leaves house with her parrot inside.


Meanwhile, man comes along and knocks on door.


Knock Knock


Parrot: who is it?


Man: it's the plumber


Parrot: who is it?


Man: it's the plumber


Parrot: who is it?


Man: IT'S THE PLUMBER!


Parrot: who is it?


Man: jeez...you deaf? It's the plumber.


Parrot: who is it?


Man: IT'S THE F-UCKING PLUMBER!


At which point the plumber has a heart attack, collapses and dies.


[2 hours' later, woman returns home...sees dead man at her door]


Woman: who the hell is this?


Parrot: IT'S THE F-UCKING PLUMBER!

HonaloochieB

HonaloochieB

Posted
Posted

Two wee Scotsmen who cannae reach the doorbell.


Look, I blame the Catholic church, had I not been raised in it, I wouldn't have had access to the monthly Crusade Messenger magazine, which in turn furnished me with this sort of joke.


Though now I think of it, it may have been the secular Whizzer and Chips.


Or Wham! even.

Ladymuck

Ladymuck

Posted
Posted

HonaloochieB Wrote:

-------------------------------------------------------

> Two wee Scotsmen who cannae reach the doorbell.

>

> Look, I blame the Catholic church, had I not been

> raised in it, I wouldn't have had access to the

> monthly Crusade Messenger magazine, which in turn

> furnished me with this sort of joke.

>

> Though now I think of it, it may have been the

> secular Whizzer and Chips.

>

> Or Wham! even.


Ahem...have I missed something? Where's the rest of the joke? I.e. what happens after:


Two wee Scotsmen who cannae reach the doorbell.

HonaloochieB

HonaloochieB

Posted
Posted

Keep up LadyM.

I said 'Knock knock'.

You said 'Who's there'?

I said 'Two wee Scotsmen who cannae reach the doorbell'

That was the punchline. Not a great or even a good punchline I'll admit.

But blame the Crusade Messenger. Or Whizzer & Chips. Or Wham!


I'm Pontius Pilating this one.

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