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Hi - not sure this will help but I had a very sleepy, jaundiced baby first time around who would fall asleep after feeding for just a few minutes. What I found helped was stripping him off before a feed so he was a bit cooler, changing his nappy before a feed to make sure he was really awake or during a feed after he'd nodded off. If he still nodded off, I rubbed his palm, walked my fingers up his spine or gently rubbed/tickled his feet. Sometimes in desperation, I'd gently blow on his face which also seemed to work for a little while. It's so frustrating but hope it gets better for you and your partner.
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Is a shame that the community midwives haven't been helpful - in 2008 after similar problems I had some great one-to-one feeding support at home from one of them. My little one had lost a fair amount of weight and was screaming constantly in hunger for the first few days, poor thing.


Some good tips she gave (others have already mentioned most of them) included expressing small amounts then syringing some into the baby's mouth at the start of a feed (which helped calm her down - she was going into big rages / screaming with frustration, which wasn't helping with the latch-on), stripping her / me down to cool her down / keep her awake, feeding when she was calm rather than already hungry and agitated and using lots of skin-to-skin contact to help calmness.


In terms of technique, it also proved helpful to lift up the boob from below and shove a big mouthful of nipple / boob into her mouth! Felt quite odd at first, but did the trick!


Sounds like you're making progress, hope things settle down soon.

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Fuschia Wrote:

-------------------------------------------------------

> You can go up to Kings I believe and see Claire

> Kedvers...


She is absolutely lovely and an expert in everything to do with breastfeeding :)

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I'm still following your story to see how your getting along. How are things now? I'm hoping things are getting much better. Engorgement may be at its peak as the 10th day postpartum comes close, hopefully then will subside dramatically if it hasn't already.
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She's doing really really well now thank you. Perhaps some engorgement returning last night but was soon addressed.


Second Widwife appointment was this last week and she'd managed to put on 6 oz in the previous 6 days which is incredible. Think our child is actually a guzzler and seems to feed far quicker than Gina expects her to.


Thanks again

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Well done. I'm really pleased too. It is definitely worth sticking it out. Good luck with the rest of the journey.


For the record - I cried almost everyday for the first 2 months of breastfeeding. It was extremely difficult for both me and my daughter due to latching problems and 'low' weight gain issues. We received amazing help and got through our bad patch. This was 18 months ago now and we are going stronger than ever, still! There is definitely light at the end of the tunnel.


All the best.

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Digression but, why oh why does Mother Nature make bf so hard that so many women need bf counsellors? So many women do need them. Babies elsewhere in the world depend totally on bf, so it's an awful thought that they might fail to thrive.


not so clever Mother Nature!

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new mother Wrote:

-------------------------------------------------------

> Digression but, why oh why does Mother Nature make

> bf so hard that so many women need bf counsellors?

> So many women do need them. Babies elsewhere in

> the world depend totally on bf, so it's an awful

> thought that they might fail to thrive.

>

> not so clever Mother Nature!


I am not sure that's quite the case. I think we just find ourselves isolated without support from other women, mothers, aunts etc who have breastfed... and the media/society has unrealistic expectations about what bf/life with a newborn is like (expecting to feed every 4h, that sort of thing)


I think also because formula is portayed via advertising etc as "as good as breast milk" there isn't much incentive for women to persist when they face difficulties... I wonder how many women in countries where there is no ready alternative, find they can't produce enough milk?

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a lot of babies don't ask to be fed. Sometimes for very long periods. I had no problem with my milk 'flow' just that the baby was latching on properly and not taking in enough milk, Plus he slept for long periods of time.


i did exactly what i was told which was to 'feed on demand'.


i had no idea that he was getting more and more dehydrated and his deterioration in health was alarming

he ended up in special care for 7 days


the nurse in special care told me HALF the babies in special care were in there for dehydration


edit to say - i then saw a bfing coach and she was amazing. I just wish i'd had access to her earlier and not just the midwives (who aren't trained in bfing)

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Interesting, study of 1678 children in Africa and length of bf


http://ije.oxfordjournals.org/cgi/reprint/25/1/115.pdf


"only five of the children

in the study never breastfed. One did not breastfeed

because the mother died while giving birth, one

mother became paretic after birth, one child was born

with cleft lip/palate and two did not start because the

mothers believed their milk was bad and would harm

the child...


These results concur with previous studies

.....only one child in a cohort of 1148 healthy, singleton children failed to

breastfeed at all."


This is interesting, because if the number of babies who couldn't successfully bf in a poor country such as Guinea Bissau is so low, why are so many women in a country like ours, with much better nutrition and healthcare, convinced that they have no milk?

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Saila Wrote:

-------------------------------------------------------

> a lot of babies don't ask to be fed. Sometimes for

> very long periods. I had no problem with my milk

> 'flow' just that the baby was latching on properly

> and not taking in enough milk, Plus he slept for

> long periods of time.

>

> i did exactly what i was told which was to 'feed

> on demand'.

>

> i had no idea that he was getting more and more

> dehydrated and his deterioration in health was

> alarming

> he ended up in special care for 7 days

>

> the nurse in special care told me HALF the babies

> in special care were in there for dehydration


Yes, feeding on demand is a misnomer... again, if we had mothers, sisters, aunts who had bf, or more accurate info about the realities of the early days, or better hands on support, we would know that a sleepy baby needs to be made to feed... i had one of these babies (twin II) and I am sure she would have been readmitted to hospital if she had been my first child... we had to feed her by syringe for the first couple of weeks.


Quite a few women on here have had similar experiences.


i think in their eagerness to encourage bf take up, the official advice misses out a lot of key info... sleepy babies... need to feed every 2-3h.... breasts can get hugely engorged when milk comes in.. all that sort of stuff

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Why does mother nature intend on making a lot of women throw up daily whilst pregnant? Or why do we have to go through monthly visits and men don't? Mother nature treated us women unfairly for unknown reasons, maybe she was on the looking out for a nice father nature?


Everything in life is practiced and learned really. Breastfeeding included. Some women take to it so naturally, others due to various problems (possibly mother nature being not so clever again) find it a struggle. Most women with a bit of support and advice tend to overcome their problems, after all mother nature cant stop us experiencing the our problems and getting through them to help out another women in our position.


Breastfeeding was never intended to be easy just because its natural, same as giving birth. If you overcome problems with anything in life the rewards are usually satisfying. Life ain't easy.

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