I hate all the mothers and mothers-to-be that have inflitrated East Dulwich in recent years

[strictteacher]

These women are vile, and should have remained firmly esconced in Wandsworth (or wherever it is they've wandered over from). I can't walk around East Dulwich these days without some gargantuan 'trendy' buggie blocking my path, or some enormous girth being proudly displayed by some woman (40+ years old, if a day).

Which brings me on to the ages of these women: many are so-o-o-o old. Dulwich Park really highlights the fact that these women had children pretty late in life. I've no doubt they had professional jobs in days of yore - but my God, how they've embraced mummyhood. It's all they bleat on about. Dulwich Park has become a no go zone for me these days. I hope these women avoid Peckham Rye Park.

The Dads are almost as bad. They are largely absent, earning in the City no doubt, but when they're about they're like some HORRIBLE kiddie's TV presenter. It's vomit inducing hearing them singing nursery rhymes and trying to make up for their absences.

It is getting to the point where I avoid East Dulwich as much as possible (despite being from the area, and living there too). These women are rude, and very superficial. When they're not stuffing an (organic) rice cake in their sprog's gob, they're taking up all the room in the Blue Mountain with their buggies, offspring and gaggle of acuaintances. Note I didn't say 'friend': these women don't 'do' friends but acquaintances. They deciode they have oddles in common - because they have a kid(s).

[Jah Lush]

I've just fallen off my chair with laughter reading that. Brilliant! A marvellous rant for a first-timer to the EDF. You've made my day. Welcome to the forum Strictteacher.

[mockney piers]

Second timer.

First post was "hi, I'm Margaret a piano teacher, would you like little timmy to learn to play the piano?"

I'm guessing this lot are your core market, non?

[Jah Lush]

Sorry, Mockers well spotted, but then you'd know that wouldn't you. Must looks that one up if it's half as funny as the title.

[blinder999]

"Margaret's current pupils are aged between 5 - 90 (yes, you're never too late to learn!)"

[fish]

Maybe, they like to discuss the benefits of IVF?

[Jeremy]

Do you have cats, Margaret?

[Michael Palaeologus]

Lots of them?

[capt_birdseye]

I think the generic term for someone like this is a "WUM".

[LuvPeckham]

capt_birdseye Wrote:

-------------------------------------------------------

> I think the generic term for someone like this is

> a "WUM".

And in Plain English for all us Peckhamites ?

[capt_birdseye]

Wind-up Merchant

[snorky]

'snot wrong through.

[bald marauder]

Gets my vote for the most stereotypical, prejudiced nonsense I've read for a long time.

Should baby M express any interest in playing the piano later in life, we will be giving you and your bile a very wide berth.

[Keef]

Wind up or not, I thought it was rather funny.

[Alan Dale]

Very funny.

Hope it's meant to be a joke and not the insane ramblings of a raisin ovaried embittered infertile.

That said I will be singing Mary Poppins loud and proud up and down lordship Lane all weekend to make up for staying until 6.30 tonight...

[*Bob*]

Nice one, Margaret! As a music teacher seeking pupils, you've done a fine job of alienating approximately 90% of your potential target market. Well, they say that no publicity is bad publicity, so here's your original 'piano lesson' posting again. You sure sound like a wonderful person for children to learn with. I'll be in touch when *Bob* Junior is a little older!

My name's Margaret, and I am an accomplished classically trained musician who holds the LRAM music teaching diploma. I have been teaching piano for many years, and I pride myself on making the piano fun and accessible to all my pupils. I encourage my students to have the confidence to play a wide variety of musical genres by ear - as well as teaching how to read music proficiently.

My current pupils are aged between 5 - 90 (yes, it's never too late to learn!), and the majority of them achieve distinctions (i.e. the highest grades) in their Associated Board of the Royal Schools of Music Theory, Classical music and Jazz piano exams. Testimonials are available. I also teach pupils who don't want to take exams, but just want to learn how to play Blues, Latin, Jazz, Pop music - and more!

I've maintained a private teaching studio since the 1970's, and all ages and skill levels are welcome. I teach 30 and 60 minute lessons, depending on your requirements. Prices range from ?18 - ?35, depending on the length of the lesson. I teach in Netherby Road SE23, which is just off Forest Hill Road SE22 opposite St. Francesca Cabrini Primary school.

[MadWorld74]

um...how do you all know that strictteacher is this woman also known as Margaret?

[Alan Dale]

Read it in the tea leaves.

[Keef]

She sounds good to me, and she's probably great with kids, it's their mums she doesn't like.

[*Bob*]

Alas, I feel that Mothers and Fathers will be less likely to opt to have their offspring tutored by someone who considers them to be 'vomit inducing'.

That's my feeling anyway. I could be wrong.

[mockney piers]

as she's the registered user.

I suppose it could be her mischievous child, bored on school holiday and margaret is anive enough to leave her login details on her PC.

In which case a clip round the ear is probably in order.

[bald marauder]

MW74,

Do a search for 'strictteacher' and all other postings made by her or featuring her user name will show up - including the piano advert.

[Alan Dale]

No kid could post that. Those are the words of a withered old cat collector...

[bald marauder]

Haha, Mr Dale, (LOL) a nice turn of phrase!

[lozzyloz]

I think you'll find it's Cloaks mum. No wonder!!