Just the punchline -

[ruffers]

"No, but I've been swung round by the t*ts once or twice."

[HonaloochieB]

"You were only supposed to blow the bloody Doors off!"

[flapjackdavey]

" two chairs and half a pigs head "

[Peckhamgatecrasher]

No, she went of her own accord!

[Huguenot]

No, she went in a Honda Accord.

[BrandNewGuy]

"Give him a biscuit and he might let you..."

[Ridgley]

"you wouldn't let it lie"

[HonaloochieB]

"Because he f*cks pigs"

[rememberwhen]

"It's much nicer than pork, isn't it?"

[Emerson Crane]

"Send my grass away to be cut!"

[HonaloochieB]

"Kermit's cock"

[flapjackdavey]

" they are'nt their true -forms "

[Peckhamgatecrasher]

*Bob*

[ruffers]

"Is this some kind of joke?"

[Ridgley]

"don't tell him pike"

[pablogrande]

No, some c##t from preston

[Wilhelm]

'Look Mister I'm not a real welder'

[ruffers]

You can't wash your hands in a bison

edit - Buffalo ruffers, buffalo!

Screwed that one up eh?

[Siduhe]

...shine a torch in her ears...

[Emerson Crane]

Your house

[Jah Lush]

So he gave her one.

[Huguenot]

...you can't have your kayak and heat it too.