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Police have a duty to inform schools of anything that they consider of concern


Schools make a decision as to whether to inform the parents and have to weigh up whether parental scaremongering against promoting basic caution


I think it is appropriate for schools to issue the warning as it is appropriate for parents to talk to their children about staying safe.


And well done that Year 6 boy who knew enough to say No thanks and to report it

There are about 50 primary schools within two miles of Eliot Bank (I just checked). Each school presumably made a judgment about whether to notify parents. Had they all decided to do so, that would be at least 15,000 parents being notified urgently that a child had been offered a lift by a stranger and had said no. I know it's a very tough thing to make a judgment call in these situations, I'm glad I don't have to do so. But still.
Very well done to the child and well done to Heber who I think handled it well. My only very little criticism is that when I phoned the office (mum of Yr6 who walks home on own) they could not tell me whether this was a general 'South London' warning after two near abductions in Kingston or a new incident. As I say, well done to the school - played right I think.

uncleglen Wrote:

-------------------------------------------------------

> There is a world of difference between a year 6

> child and a 6 year old child (no-one would let the

> latter go to school on their own I would hope)


Yes, I think some people do let young children, eg 6 yrs old walk to school alone... wasn't there a thread about it a while back?


But 6 yrs or yr 6, if the school had not informed parents, and a real abduction occured a day later, people would then be criticising the school for not contacting parents in the first instance. So I think the school did the right thing.

Curmudgeon Wrote:

-------------------------------------------------------


> And well done that Year 6 boy who knew enough to

> say No thanks and to report it


xxxxxxx


Agreed.


But also very sad for the man offering the lift if it was genuine.


What a reflection on our modern society that we have to assume, and teach our children to assume, that apparently kind strangers can't be trusted.


I think on balance the schools who texted parents played it right though. Though perhaps "attempted abduction" was a bit strongly worded.

If a man was to pull over and offer my child a lift I would consider this to be very inappropriate and a huge cause for concern. To say it is 'unnecessary scaremongering' is very naive of you, in this day and age grown men don't just go around offering lifts to young children! Would you offer a lift to a random child in the street? Of course you wouldn't!

This sort of thing needs to be highlighted to remind parents and children to be vigilant as this isn't normal behaviour, the incident clearly alarmed the child enough for him to report it.

-------------------------------------------------------

> In which case, I would say labelling it as an

> "Attempted Abduction" was unnecessary

> scaremongering (however dodgy the person offering

> the lift might have been). I would suggest that

> it is just as safe to let your Year 6 child walk

> to school in East Dulwich next Monday as it was

> yesterday, or ten years ago. In fact, it's

> probably safer. And remember children, if a

> stranger offers you a lift, always say no - just

> like my mother told me.

I completely agree with Lishyloo,


The poor child must have been really scared. There are no witnesses to elaborate on what happened. The boy was uncomfortable with the situation and reported it - well done. I think if the school had not told parents then there would be grounds for an outcry.


I was taught stranger danger at school and at home when I was growing up. Is that kind of stuff still taught?


D




Lishyloo Wrote:

-------------------------------------------------------

> If a man was to pull over and offer my child a

> lift I would consider this to be very

> inappropriate and a huge cause for concern. To say

> it is 'unnecessary scaremongering' is very naive

> of you, in this day and age grown men don't just

> go around offering lifts to young children! Would

> you offer a lift to a random child in the street?

> Of course you wouldn't!

> This sort of thing needs to be highlighted to

> remind parents and children to be vigilant as this

> isn't normal behaviour, the incident clearly

> alarmed the child enough for him to report it.

> --------------------------------------------------

> -----

> > In which case, I would say labelling it as an

> > "Attempted Abduction" was unnecessary

> > scaremongering (however dodgy the person

> offering

> > the lift might have been). I would suggest

> that

> > it is just as safe to let your Year 6 child

> walk

> > to school in East Dulwich next Monday as it was

> > yesterday, or ten years ago. In fact, it's

> > probably safer. And remember children, if a

> > stranger offers you a lift, always say no -

> just

> > like my mother told me.

I too agree with Lishyloo.

As the mum of a year 6 girl and year 7 boy I would be very concerned at anyone, male or female, offering them an unsolicited lift to school, bus strike or no bus strike, and likewise, there is no way I would stop and offer an unknown child a lift.

Well done to the lad for his response and I think Heber were right to alert parents,.

I'll be letting friends know so that the 'stranger danger' message can be repeated, and after reminding my two, they'll be making their own way to and from school as usual next week.

Each point of view has its merits, but surely it was a little over the top for the school to term the incident as an "attempted abduction" without, apparently, having any evidence in support?

More years ago than I care to remember, a man whose face was vaguely familiar to me offered me a lift on my way home from school. As taught by my school and parents, I declined, thought no more about it and didn't tell anyone as I didn't attach any significance to the incident. Very soon afterwards it transpired that the man was a business colleague of my father - I had met him once. He took the trouble to phone my father to tell him of the incident, and my parents were happy to know that I was acted as guided by them and my school.

A year 6 child is 10-11 and they are allowed to leave school without an adult IE walk home alone.


I am all for the school telling kids what to do about strangers and knowing about risk.

But sending all the parents (of which I am one) this text with such dramatic wording was misguided and unnecessary. As far as I know no other school in the area did the same thing. I would be very interested to know what the police or Southwark council would have advised them to do in this situation.

The only evidence put forward so far is that it is an attempted lift offer - it is certainly true that offering lifts has traditionally be seen as an entre into attempts at assault/ abduction - but offering a lift per se may be seen as a necessary but not a sufficient preliminary to such activity.


Of course warning parents that there could, based on the offer of a lift, be a predetary adult about may be sensible, but it is about suspicion, not certainty.


It is still quite possible that the adult involved may have recognised the child (possibly a neighbour) and have been making an entirely innocent offer of assistance (it is also true that many incidences of child assault are instigated by people who already know - and may have been grooming - the child, so the 'no lifts unless pre-arranged with a parent' rule that we instill in children is still a sound one).


We must try to draw a line between reasonable caution and being alarmist. If the police do have reason to believe there is a predatory adult in our area (outwith the sole 'evidence' of the offer of a lift) then perhaps they should make this clearer.

I personally would want to know, and I will make up my own mind whether the school is being alarmist or cautious. To me this is a right to know issue--we could argue about whether it's sensible or alarmist till as e-dealer said the cows come home. As for people genuinely offering children lifts--puh-lease--why not then offer everyone at the bus stop a lift?

It's the Kingston incidents that seem more scary. Press reports from back in May say it was a man and woman.



Edit. Although seems now they weren't linked


https://www.sutton.gov.uk/index.aspx?articleid=16262



clux Wrote:

-------------------------------------------------------

> Similar happened about 4 months ago at a lewisham

> school... Again a year 6 pupil, on her way home.

Sue Wrote:

-------------------------------------------------------

>

> But also very sad for the man offering the lift if

> it was genuine.

>

> What a reflection on our modern society that we

> have to assume, and teach our children to assume,

> that apparently kind strangers can't be trusted.

>

> I think on balance the schools who texted parents

> played it right though. Though perhaps "attempted

> abduction" was a bit strongly worded.



'Modern' society? How old are you!? My grandparents (who were born in the 1890s) warned me of not talking to strangers!

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