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*Strolls into the room full of the joys of spring*

*Sees MD74 somewhat dejected and slumped in armchair*

*Here's one for your soon to be former colleagues*


A man is convicted of theft in court.

"Before I read your sentence," says the Judge, "have you anything to say for yourself?"

"Yes," replies the man. "As God is my witness, I am innocent."

The Judge replies: ""Well he isn't. I am. You aren't. Six months."


*I think it's Pimms O'clock.*

*Starts making up a big jug*

*Anyone else fancy some?*

*Walks purposefully into quiet room dressed up for Japanese tea ceremony.*


*Admires reflection in full length window pain, thinks to self - "I look stunning with black hair and red Kimono."


*Wonders if Mr Keef is somewhere sellotaped to a lamp post on his stag party... waves to MW74 and offers cup of tea*

*Arrives in quiet room straigh from work in a state of exhaustion - staggers behind Japanese screen.*


*Shower noises and steam noted above screen*


*Jumps out from behind screen with back combed hair in super New Romantic outfit*


*Changes track on Ipod - asks: "Anyone for a boogie, I just love Dead or Alive?"*


Calls out to Mr Keef, "Is there any Snake Bite?"

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  • Latest Discussions

    • But all those examples sell a wide variety of things,  and mostly they are well spread out along Lordship Lane. These two shops both sell one very specific thing, albeit in different flavours, and are just across the road from each other. I don't think you can compare the distribution of shops in Roman times to the distribution of shops in Lordship Lane in the twenty first century. Well, you can, but it doesn't feel very appropriate. Haa anybody asked the first shop how they feel? Are they happy about the "healthy competition" ?
    • ED is included in the 17 August closure set (or just possibly 15 August, depending on which part of the page you trust more) listed at https://metro.co.uk/2025/07/25/full-list-25-poundland-stores-confirmed-close-august-23753048/. Here incidentally are some snippets from their annual reports, at https://find-and-update.company-information.service.gov.uk/company/02495645/filing-history. 2022: " during the period we opened 41 stores and closed 43 loss-making/under-performing stores.  At the period-end we were trading from 821 stores in the UK, IoM and ROI. ... "We renogotiated 82 leases in the year, saving on average 45% versus the prior lease agreement..." 2023: "We also continued to improve our market footprint through sourcing better store locations, opening 53 and closing 51 stores during the year." 2024:  "The ex-Wilco stores acquired in the prior year have formed a core part of this strategy to expand our store network.  We favour quality over quantity and during the period we opened 84 stores and closed 71 loss-making/under-performing ones."
    • Ha! After I posted this, I thought of lots more examples. Screwfix and the hardware store? Mrs Robinson and Jumping Bean? Chemists, plant shops, hairdressers...  the list goes on... it's good to have healthy competition  Ooooh! Two cheese shops
    • You've got a point.  Thinking Leyland and Screwfix too but this felt different.
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