my beard is dead, long live my beard

[Asset]

I rather imagine it to look like Azul's now departed effort.

[SteveT]

A proper mans beard is determined by how much of a handful you need to lop off, to scour the Sunday roast tin clean;-)

[KalamityKel]

Steve y must u always conjure up such disgusting images? :|

[Jah Lush]

I grew a beard once when I was in my early 20s but got bored of it after six weeks so shaved half of it off and had my hair died blonde. Obviously I did look very silly with blonde hair and half a dark brunette beard but I'd do anything for a laugh in those days and naturally I was very very very drunk.

It only lasted for the Easter Bank Holiday weekend whilst I was staying with a girlfriend when she was at Canterbury University. The other half of the beard went before I went back to work although trying to get my hair back to it's natural colour was a bit of a disaster as at first it went a sort of horrible reddish copper colour.

[Cassius]

Johnny Depp looks good with a beard - can't think of anyone that does (not even George Clooney can carry it off)

[Brendan]

I have about 4 days worth of stubble. Does that count?

[mockney piers]

Captain Birdseye did alright. Does that make beards fatal? hmmmmm.

[Brendan]

That could be why we have this enduring cultural image of old men with beards. Only it got confused somewhere along the line and it is in fact the image of a young man dying of beard.

Passed down from the great beard epidemic that was responsible for the fall of the Viking kingdoms.

[mockney piers]

And the great Joy of Sex Beard pandemic of 1972 led to the almost complete disappearance of new men by the turn of the millennium*.

I think next stop New Scientist!!

it's progress is excruciatingly slow, firstly you're clean shaven and out with your mates talking about football. You discover the first joys of beard and sex and pretty soon you're doing the washing up together and talking about skin regimes among couples after the ballet.

By the time the beard is shoulder length the Vicar of Dibley is amusing, and soon the will to live is simply sapped from your body....or something.

[Brendan]

You know I am feeling a bit poorly and I went to Boots on my lunch break and bought one of those scrunchy, shower sponge things.

As soon as I get home I?m shaving before I end up doing the laundry and baking another victoria sponge.

[Peckhamgatecrasher]

Don't worry, Brendan. Sean's already admitted on another thread that he buys cosmetics in Dr Boos.

[Brendan]

Oy vey

[RosieH]

mockney piers Wrote:

-------------------------------------------------------

> By the time the beard is shoulder length the Vicar

> of Dibley is amusing, and soon the will to live is

> simply sapped from your body....or something.

do you think ZZ Top enjoyed The Vicar of Dibley? No sir, they did not. They enjoyed the company of ladies with long and luscious legs - as they should. A beard is a fine thing, all the better to hold onto in moments of passion

[Asset]

Brendan Wrote:

-------------------------------------------------------

> You know I am feeling a bit poorly and I went to

> Boots on my lunch break and bought one of those

> scrunchy, shower sponge things.

>

> As soon as I get home I?m shaving before I end up

> doing the laundry and baking another victoria

> sponge.

Not being a bit gender stereotypical here are you Brendan?

[Brendan]

Gender stereotypical. Pah. Typical woman.

[Asset]

never miss a trick

[mockney piers]

ZZ Top subscribe to Esquire....fact!!!!

[SeanMacGabhann]

aaaannnnd? Not exclusively mind... some I get in Boos, some in Boots and some in Val's opposite the library. s'all about context innit?

[Annasfield]

RosieH Wrote:

-------------------------------------------------------

>

> do you think ZZ Top enjoyed The Vicar of Dibley?

> No sir, they did not. They enjoyed the company of

> ladies with long and luscious legs - as they

> should. A beard is a fine thing, all the better

> to hold onto in moments of passion

Seconded (tu)

[Brendan]

Sean what cosmetics do you buy in Vals?

Colman?s mustard face masque perhaps or Red Stripe shampoo? Maybe some salt-fish body scrub.

[david_carnell]

If you are really interested in beards you should have seen me compete in last year's World Beard and Moustache Championships. The winners (alas I am not among them) from Brighton can be seen in all their glory here.

Huzzah for the Garibaldi!

[KalamityKel]

*shudders at the thought of men's facial hair*