Rancho Relaxo

[citizenED]

*vegetarians at the Rancho - gadzooks!*

*nice touch though, Keef - you all-inclusive fella*

*sears half a steer - slams it on mammoth barby*

*slurps some of Keefs shandy*

*anyone for a rack o ribs?

[SeanMacGabhann]

* blackened on the outside, tender on the inside *

* the meant, not me*

(in the actual world I am slightly sad at how much I want this place to be real)

[Keef]

*Whispers to Sean* "The pictures are real, and yes I miss it!!!!!! Just imagine if this was your back yard!"

*Hands friend a whiskey*

[SeanMacGabhann]

* couldn't accept whiskey until spreadsheet issue fixed *

* done - lovely! cheers Keef *

[Michael Palaeologus]

*Ooh new play ground - sorry i'm late*

*Stomps in, in a bow-legged gaucho kind of way.Wearing a dusty faded poncho, shabby knee length britches, hand made sandles and a huge sombrero. Cheap cigar clenched between teeth, one of which glints gold in the blazing, high summer sun (yeah, right). Leading a bedraggled and lactating burro*

*Stuffed into waste of britches is an ancient pistol held together with brass wire*

"Aye Muchachos, this cigar is f'ing horrible, my poncho itches, my pistol is poking me in the nachos and Senora Dobbin's fleas are giving her some jip"

"I'm gaggin for a cuppa and there's no mistakin' my old chihuahua"

*Looses Senora Dobbin and she wanders off grazing and lactating*

*Wearily slumps into rattan seat, dumps pistol onto table, it falls apart*

*Perhaps the Texan oil billionaire look would have been better*

*Slips some old school Santana onto the CD player and settles down for a siesta*

[SeanMacGabhann]

* hey welcome senor - good to see you *

* but seence July 1st, for health and safety reasons, no lactating indoors *

* your fren will have to stay outside *

[Michael Palaeologus]

*Aye aye aye*

"Senora Dobbin - pop out to the high sierra next door - there's a good donkey"

"Honestly Sean, that was rather stern. Are you a reformed lactator? They are usually the most hard line on these matters"

[mockney piers]

Pours self a stiff gin *shwapp - glug*

Pours self another stiff gin *shwapp - glug*

Pours self another stiff gin *shwapp - glug*

Pours self another stiff gin *shwapp - glug*

Pours self another stiff gin *shwapp - glug*

flubbit, pours self another stiff gin *shwapp - glug*

trips up on way to barbbq, mmmm cold tiles

[SeanMacGabhann]

* what a funny angle mockney sleeps in *

* Michale I don make de rules - ElPaso council - they have inspectors *

[Keef]

*Whilst half way through preparing a gin based cocktail, he realises that some greedy git has necked the whole bottle*

*Shrugs and reaches for the JD*

*Trips over sleeping form of Mockney Piers and ends up in the pool*

[citizenED]

*pours a bucket of water over Mockney - come on Mockers there's gristle to be eaten*

*slaps MP on back and leads him to other padres by the meat*

*gee, its hot in here*

*hands out bandanas*

*that five o'clock shadow suits you well, Deputy Sean*

[SeanMacGabhann]

* why thank you pardner *

* good to see the sun do it's thang - makes the cold stuff taste all the better *

* plus it makes the gals all "funny" *

[TillieTrotter]

*spologieses to keeeef for my greed* *dons full length batheing bell cossie and jumps in with the gals*

[Keef]

*Slightly concerned about health and safety issues surrounding drinking and swimming, he throws lots of inflatable pool toys in for the girls*

*Uncovers tray of chicken that's been marinating in jerk sauce... Places it all on the barby*

*Puts on Stetson and heads over to do some bull riding, sure that the alcohol intake will lessen the pain when he is thrown after 1 second!*

[Michael Palaeologus]

*Takes Senora Dobbin OFF the Barbie - Honestly you boys*

*Pushes Senora Dobbin into the pool - that should cool her down*

*Takes very burnt chicken off the Barbie its been on there for over 5 hours and is a little charred*

*Puts on fresh supplies of chuck on the BBQ*

*Pours a tequila - chills*

[citizenED]

*tops up with one of Michael's tequilas*

*a more satisfying way to spend a Sat arf-noon I do not know*

*gets out chewing 'bacci'. Trusts it isn't banned in these parts*

*looks forward to sundown...*

[citizenED]

*Gee, time is slow in these parts*

*threw the doors open on Saturdee and still waiting for party to get going*

*tumbleweed already?*

[Jah Lush]

Storms through the doors after a good reccy of the island, Jamaican woodbine dangling from mouth, bottle of Jack Daniels in one hand, case full of classic reggae CDs in the other, puts on Doctor Alimantado's Best Dressed Chicken In Town, starts skanking and passes bottle to Citizen and reaches for Red Stripes from the fridge, "Come on man, let's get this party started.":)-D

[SeanMacGabhann]

* looks out hotel window and sees what can only be described as "a man on a mission" headed to the ranch *

* grabs pistol, boots and wallet and heads for door *

[Jah Lush]

Ah! Sean, good to see you made it at last, have a beer mate.

[SeanMacGabhann]

* beer? at this hour? bit early Jah so I'll stick with the bourbon till lunch - but cheers anyway *

* what's cooking today? *

[Jah Lush]

I was thinking along the lines of jerk chicken, rice and peas & ackee, that sort of thing, maybe some curried goat for later. Anyway, more beer.

[Keef]

*Walks in wearing dreadlock wig*

"Peace be the journey"

*Takes out bottle of over proof rum*

"Anyone got any lime?*

[Jah Lush]

Plenty in the fridge Keef, Overproof is evil, have some Mount Gay instead.

[Keef]

Overproof IS evil!

Havana 7 anyone???