Is anyone else bothered by the group of teenagers in Goose Green playground?

[El Pibe]

This felt vaguely relevant, latest bored teenageers trend in US, they're setting fire to themselves

and thought this might cheer up a few who prefer a more heavy handed approach

 

[LadyDeliah]

Sophron, you clearly didn't understand what I was saying, which was that I doubt you live close to the kinds of kids who grow up with alcoholic/drug addicted abusive parents, but in reality they are all our neighbours (maybe not in close proximity) and what happens to them affects all of society.

I wasn't even saying the kids mentioned in the original postings came from these kinds of backgrounds, but the references to scum, thugs, feral kids etc and the later posts saying they'd been subject to increasingly extreme behaviour made me bring up the connection between lack of money spent on preventing kids becoming damaged versus waiting till they are fucked up then banging them in jail.

El Pibe, I would prefer less government, at the top, not just at the bottom. If they are going to take our taxes, spend them on making society better, not on funding armies, militarised police forces, corporations who have been allowed to hoover up our public assets at huge discounts etc.

My idea of less government would also be less government to protect the elite from having their loot and land re-distributed.

I'm all for a bit of anarchy, but not sure I'll get many EDFers on board lol.

[Jeremy]

El Pibe Wrote:

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> thought this might cheer up a few who prefer a more heavy handed approach

Looks like that is far from the first punch that woman's ever thrown!

[LadyDeliah]

What woman is that?

[Sophron]

Is this Lady D. mistaking a poor drug addled teenager for one of the many yuppie millionaires of East Dulwich(despite the skateboard as she doesn't like to conflate reality with her own world view she has decided she is right)?

[TE44]

Sophran I believe the question of the parents were brought up by another poster, I'm not sure there would be

many millionaire kids.

Young adts/teenagers hanging around bothering people do tend to make assumptions on where your from, if they've had

a rough life they often feel resentful and assume, often wrongly, others are more

priviledged, and would never understand the problems the face them.this causes a big barrier when it comes to approaching them about unacceptable behaviour.

[Otta]

If they're around 14 shouldn't they be off trying to buy booze?

[3 little piggies]

Jeremy Wrote:

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> 3 little piggies Wrote:

> --------------------------------------------------

> -----

> > When my two were small I found the teens

> > intimidating and unapproachable and now mine

> are

> > 13 and 14 they are part of that 'set'.

>

> Your kids also bully younger children?

Jeremy, in response to your question, no, my kids don't bully younger children.

The 'set' I am referring to are the young teens in general, which, as a parent of young children, I was naturally wary of, having never had experience of dealing with them.

Now I have no choice, these teens are my kids' peers, my kids go to school with them, travel to and from school alongside them, they come into contact with them every day, I have had to learn how to deal with them and more importantly, so have my kids.

I still find them intimidating and unapproachable but do we just 'give up'? Are they all 'gangsters in the making'? It's easy to demonise them all but harder to work out a solution. As a parent of kids of that age I am merely trying to explain (not excuse) some of their behaviour and to say childhood goes very quickly, it only seems like yesterday that mine were the little ones playing on the swings.

And just to make it clear, I'm very proud that last week on the rowing course they was on, my 13 year old daughter and 14 year old son integrated with all the teens (including the big and scary monosyllabic ones). At the beginning of the week they were the only ones speaking to the overweigh, introverted and obvious outsider in the group, encouraging his participation and making sure to include him, whilst the others were making fun. By the end of the week he was a natural part of the group and his dad came over and thanked my two, as did the course leader.

It's a shame you only chose to highlight that small part of my post and turn it into something negative. Bullying behaviour me thinks?

[Otta]

Or a joke me thinks.

[Jeremy]

3 little piggies Wrote:

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> It's a shame you only chose to highlight that

> small part of my post and turn it into something

> negative. Bullying behaviour me thinks?

Don't be ridiculous.

You wrote a post which, to me, seemed to suggest that the behaviour of these kids was normal. While I think that some of the behaviour described here (particularly the more extreme examples) is quite abnormal.

Of course I realise that your kids don't behave in the same way... that was my point.

I don't think we should accept it just because, your know, "they're teenagers".

[Belle]

As an aside, that is a really nice story about your kids and the shy teen. You're quite right to be proud about that.

[standswithfist]

Yes - i'll second what Belle said.

[3 little piggies]

Thanks Belle,

I try to see positives in most things and I guess my kids have taken that on board too.

I think it's always better to try and find some common ground somehow. I've always looked at things not just in terms of my kids, but the kids they are mixing with, learning with, playing with, living with. I get involved with their schools and the after school clubs they go to. The more informed you are, the easier things are to deal with hopefully.

Don't get me wrong, mine are no angels. Both are argumentative, ungrateful, often unresponsive or confrontational and most of the time pretty un-civil to each other. I'm finding the teen years the hardest to deal with, there is a constant battle of wills over everything. It's very, very hard, mostly unrewarding, but it's all part of the job and I'm just catching glimpses of the light at the end of the teen tunnel.

I read an interesting article which described teen hormones as severing a lot of the early brain links, enabling new, adult behaviour to be learnt. Parents are seen as an obstruction, it's their peers who are the all important people to them. If we can influence and engage with one or two, surely that's better than alienating.

Final thought - the lovely, wonderful, funny, cute little ones running around Goose Green playground today will very soon become the surly teens of tomorrow. Hopefully none of them will be the subject of similar future posts. But can you be sure of that?

[Earl Aelfheah]

3 little piggies Wrote:

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> Final thought - the lovely, wonderful, funny, cute

> little ones running around Goose Green playground

> today will very soon become the surly teens of

> tomorrow. Hopefully none of them will be the

> subject of similar future posts. But can you be

> sure of that?

I agree and hopefully, whilst they're still funny, cute innocent little ones, they won't have to witness violent and aggressive behaviour, especially in an area designed for them to be safe and have fun.

[Sophron]

I also agree and well done for providing boundrys to your difficult teens who won't thank you now but will better learn how to navigate their way through life with out being mean, rude, violent or explicit around other people - especially little kids in a little kids play area.

[Jeremy]

> Hopefully none of them will be the

> subject of similar future posts. But can you be

> sure of that?

I take your point in a way - even kids from apparently stable, loving backgrounds can go off the rails.

But responsible parents should be able to make certain guarantees. That they go to reasonable lengths to know what their children are doing and who they're with. That if the kids get in trouble, they do something about it. That they don't threaten to beat up other parents who complain about their behaviour.

[robbin]

3 little piggies wrote

"And just to make it clear, I'm very proud that last week on the rowing course they was on, my 13 year old daughter and 14 year old son integrated with all the teens (including the big and scary monosyllabic ones). At the beginning of the week they were the only ones speaking to the overweigh, introverted and obvious outsider in the group, encouraging his participation and making sure to include him, whilst the others were making fun. By the end of the week he was a natural part of the group and his dad came over and thanked my two, as did the course leader."

Wow - your kids are like angels...

Very different, it seems, from the feral low life we are talking about at Goose Green.

[Otta]

There we go again with the "feral low life" crap. You sound nice.

> Hopefully none of them will be the

> subject of similar future posts. But can you be

> sure of that?

No one can be sure of anything, but not having the current teenagers in their playgrounds setting an example for them to follow would probably be a good start.