Religious Callers

[LuvPeckham]

Today, I am working from Home, and for the forth time in 2 weeks I have answered the door to someone asking about my religion and do I believe in their own special God.

It is starting to scare me that maybe they know something is about to happen "The End of the World is Nigh" or soemething of that world shattering ilk.

I will admit that they are starting to annoy me now, espcially as last night they disturbed the Coven and our ritual sacrifice of a virgin (don't they know how hard it is to find a virgin these days (6) )

Is anyone else getting annoyed and what techniques (apart from the polite no thank you and shutting the door) do you use ?

[Brendan]

They?re casing the joint for Jesus.

[LuvPeckham]

What.......

They are selling Joints..... ????

[Brendan]

Joints for Jesus.

Hmmm?. It may actually catch on.

[SeanMacGabhann]

They aren't more annoying to me than the cold-calls I get from some call-centre in upnorthsville or India

But that's not to say they aren't ALL very annoying

I used to live with a Jehovas Witness - which was good because I didn't get any of them cold-calling. But they really believe this stuff. Like REALLY.. with no irony, wink or nod or nuffink. 144, 000 of us getting to heaven, people and that's it - if your names not on the list etc etc

[LuvPeckham]

I always wonder if the Jehovas Witnesses and their 'conversion calls' is a bit like Pyramid Selling, the more people they convert the better chance they have of getting on that final list of 144,000 thereby the people they convert need to convert more people to move up that list and so on...

Eventually there has to be a point where there is no way anyone else can get on the list so new conversions are actually not going to get what they signed up for....

I wonder if the religious version of the FSA has ever looked into this ?

[Brendan]

Doesn?t say much for old Jo?s omnipotence if he could only make the gaff big enough for 0.0001352666854534551928832821803987%* of the people who have ever been born.

* Figure based on the best guesstimate I could find on t?internet and assuming the assumption of these lucky folk into heaven took place in 2002 which was the year of Rapture?s last world tour.

[SeanMacGabhann]

doesn't say much for him generally if he's limiting it to that many. And we have to compete with the dead! Imagine being close to one of the last people to get in and then Ghandi shows up with a few of his mates - bah

[Jah Lush]

I got a Jehovah's Witness advent calender the other day. I opened the first door and there was two of the bastards standing behind it.

[woodie]

I find saying "thanks but i dont do jesus" works fine. (then bosh back upstairs to practice the nativity tunes. which that time, is exactly what happened.)

[ChavWivaLawDegree]

The Jehova's witnesses also beleive that the heavenly 144,000 will govern the new improved earth and all the ones who don't get into heaven and who aren't evil etc get to live in harmony on the paradise earth. They showed me, and it does actually say so in the bible.

[Asset]

oh well, must be true then

[ChavWivaLawDegree]

Yep, so you better start getting your lives in order you heathens.

[????]

I do just tell them to Fuck Off nowadays, I can't put up with their contstant interference and the damage that their (and others) babaric superstisions impose on the world ....I'm sure they've got some secret code on the pavement saying 'home of the devil' as they don't visit much..that suits me fine

[Ladygooner]

Just don't open the door to them - I never answer the door on Saturday mornings any more

[SeanMacGabhann]

Oh dear God (;-)) CWALD - that's in Revelations which, of all of the biblical texts is the most fantastical, farcical and irrelevant. (possible tautology alert, depending on your beliefs there) Besides, a cap on the number of people getting in to heaven is the least of our problems if even half the things in that book come to pass

[Brendan]

As a to-the-letter follower of the Book of Revelations I say you can take your comments to umbrage sir.

As for annoying callers, well I find that not washing the blood off before opening the door usually gets rid of them.

[ChavWivaLawDegree]

But it's in the bible SeanMc - so why is it that only the JW's seem to be aware of it?

Are the rest of Christendom sleeping?

[SeanMacGabhann]

Nope, just most other religions treat Reveleations as the black sheep of the family and tend to agree it's pretty nuts. Although there are many other books which have been dis-included in the canon anyway - no-one is reading the whole text. But now we are getting into an area of talking about religion and faiths generally which I know has upset some good people before and should perhaps be carried on in a thread oother than this one (where even religious people might be inclined to have a pop at door-to-door people)

[ChavWivaLawDegree]

It's also mentioned in Isiah and some other bits too, so is kind of wierd that other Christian denominations ignore that bit.

[SeanMacGabhann]

you're not saying YOU buy it are you?

[Brendan]

I think most of Christendom realised a long time that the bible in general is a bit nuts and can?t be taken literally. Although the official party line is that it is. But it isn?t really only sometimes when being used to justify whatever activity or belief is currently en vogue for that particular denomination.

[ChavWivaLawDegree]

I just find it wierd when different types of Christians take or leave whichever bit of the bible suits them, but something as fundamental as what happens after we die, or who gets to go to heaven etc seems wierd to gloss over.

I am an anglican pretty much, but find it interesting to see what other denominations are saying.

[mockney piers]

Wasn't it Thomas Aquinas who came up with the idea that the New Jerusalem was an inner spiritual place and not to be taken literally and most of Revelation as parable or at the very least metaphor?

Since then mainstream christian religion has stuck to that with the fringes (Opus Dei are fairly literal on this i believe, I sat next to one for 5 years and he was pretty insistent that doom was in the air) and every lunatic religious preacher from Matthis in Munster through to Koresh in Carmel (ok it's really called Waco, but the alliteration is better) embracing the more eschatalogical interpretations (especially your loons in the religious right constantly bleating on about rapture, which is a pretty modern and unsurprisingly millenarian concept).

I could be wrong of course, and by all accounts the world will end....eventually!!

[Mark]

Ask them if they would forgive you for wounding them out of anger.