Funny things children say...

[Mick Mac]

My 3 year old daughter came into the bathroom one day when I was in there.

I said - "do you mind, could I please have some privacy?"

She thought, looked puzzled and said

"We don't have any of that in this house, would you like some broccoli instead?"

[brum]

That's a classic. I laughed out loud at that one.(tu)

[Eliza.D]

When my son was young he couldn't pronounce Lordship Lane. He used to say 'Are we going to Lordshit Lane?'

[KalamityKel]

I was told yesterday by my 7 yr old niece that being married was disgusting. When ask why she thought that she advised me coz that means you have sex and that's disgusting...

dum de dum

[Ms T]

My son asked me what a luigi board was.:))

[ruffers]

An exchange from when my son was three or four -

Me - "Knock knock"

Him - "Hold on Dad, I know this one"

[woofmarkthedog]

I cringe now but............a few years ago when I "honked the horn" in the car at some one ......my then 3 yr old would say....get the f*** out the way"...............not proud.........but nicley observed....had to make up a song so whenenever we 'honked" again..........took a while but it worked..

Woof

[Mikecg]

Woofmarkthechav

[chuff]

My eldest son, when 5 came home from school one day desperate to tell me something

Son. Mummy, a boy in my class said the 's' word today

Me. Oh that's not nice, you shouldn't say bad words

Son. Yes, he says, I told him that but the boy said I didn't understand what it meant so I should shut up. What does it mean?

Me. Thinking the worst it could be is 'shit' says, well tell me what he said and I will try to explain.

Son. No, you will tell me off

Me. No I won't, don't worry, in this situation I won't.

Son. Hmmmm ok.....

F*****g he'll

Me. Shock, oh that's not an s word, it's an f word!

And floundered dreadfully for ages.

[PeckhamRose]

The little girl who hugged the snowman she saw a few weeks ago, and said "Mr Snowman are you cold?" melted this childfree woman's heart.

[????]

Little boy is in the bath points at his balls and says to his mum, "mum, mum, are those my brains?"

she replies, "Not yet darling, not yet".

[woofmarkthedog]

mikethefag................

[charliecharlie]

My nephew, at the age of 4, was cuddling up to my Mum (his Grandma) and looking lovingly into her eyes...

"Granoie" (that's what used to her called her),

"Yes darling?"...

"Granoie... (long pause)... your face looks just like a landslide"...

oh, how the mighty are fallen, my Mum used to be a model...

http://barbadosfreepress.files.wordpress.com/2006/12/greenland-barbados-landslide-2.jpg

[Mikecg]

Hit a nerve did we woofy my old friend. HAHAHA!

[charliecharlie]

friend's kid in the back, we are sitting traffic,

a car is completely blocking the way and the driver is behaving like a complete plonker

suddenly this voice comes from the back (son aged 3 and a half)

"What ya waitin' for????..... Christmas!!!"

[RosieH]

woofmarkthedog Wrote:

-------------------------------------------------------

> mikethefag................

woofmarkthedog, mikecg - get a room and maybe try to work it out mano a mano

[jaybee82]

My mum told me that when in Primary School the Headteacher had to go into hospital for a hip operation. The whole school was tasked with writing 'get well soon' cards, but mine was the only one to include the caption 'Hip Hip Hooray'.

Pretty proud of that one at such an early age.

James, age 4.

[anapau]

3 yr old talking to nursery teacher about private parts.

Girl: My daddy's got a willy. My mummy says it's ENORMOUS!

[Mick Mac]

I know that child, I know that nursery, I know that mother.

[anapau]

Ah I see! Forgot to mention that same child also spent a great deal of her time describing her daddy's toe fungus.

[Mick Mac]

em - quickly deletes previous post.

[anapau]

:))

[northlondoner]

My step daughter was out her mum and aunt one summer afternoon. Step daughter was very excied to tell me about the pimps mum+ aunt had sampled at a pub. She meant Pimms. I think.

[KalamityKel]

whilst in car wiv brother and 4yr old nephew...

"oh come off it you could get a bloody bus through that! what's the matter with you? You a silly woman? Put your glasses on!"

I turned round quite shocked at the rant of the little person to see a very cheeky grin and advise that daddy says it all the time... I can quite believe it although with reference to the bus - my brother is a bus driver!

[charliecharlie]

My niece, aged 4 came back from nursery one day and was chatting about how naughty some of the kids were and how to be good at school...

her mum said "you know how to be good Flossie, don't you"

she said "yes - not say fucky hell to Miss Jackson"

Miss Jackson was her poor teacher